Ladies do you think rape is something men do
out of a desire for control empowered by years of patriarchy?
You clearly have been mislead by the notion that women
are people too.
Because, let's face it ladies,
Rape? It's your fault.
It all begins with what you wear.
Scientific study suggests that women who wear skirts
are the leading cause of rape.
Do you know why?
Because men have eyes.
In fact, here are some examples of provocative clothing
that could cause rape.
Notice the one thing they all had in common?
That's right, all women.
No women, no rape.
Now, some people might actually argue
that the crime is committed by men
and to these people I say:
"Who gives birth to these men?"
Right again, it's us. It's my fault.
Indian culture provides for several progressive methods to counter rape.
For example, the godman prescribed, "Bhaiya".
Where you just refer to your attacker as "Bhaiya"
and, voilà, rape cancelled. Now...
"Bhaiya, bhaiya".
Ladies, this works every time.
Another way women shamelessly propagate rape
is by working late into the night.
Ladies, why work late and be independent?
In fact, why work at all?
That's what husbands are for.
Fun fact, if he is your husband,
it's not rape.
Powerful people have been spreading rumors that
things apart from you can cause rape.
For example 'Chowmein'.
Chowmein is made in the kitchen and who's in the kitchen?
Movies. And who titillates men on screen?
And cell phones.
Cell phones are made for talking and who talks a lot?
In fact to elucidate further, here is a pie chart.
As you can see, women are the leading cause of 100% of all sexual assaults.
Oh, I'm sorry. The math is wrong. Clearly this pie chart was made by a woman.
Now before we go, let's not forget:
If you're tired of being humiliated by rape,
you can always go to the cops and be humiliated by them instead.
Madam, when rape was happened, were you with boys?
No, not.
Why you went out without boy's protection?
Well, actually, there were a couple of my friends there.
See? Who are with boys at night?
What will happen?
So, what did we learn today?
It's, it's my fault.
Thank you officer, thank you.
And lastly ladies,
stop seducing juveniles into raping you.
They get let off easily.
And that, just makes you
a statutory rapist.
And whose fault is that?
It's your fault.
It's my fault.
It's your fault.