[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.46,0:00:19.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's an ancient and well-known\Nphilosophical riddle that asks:
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.83,0:00:26.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"If a tree falls in the forest\Nand no one is around to hear it,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:27.75,0:00:29.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,does it still make a sound?"
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.40,0:00:36.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A scientific view is that,\Nwhile a tree will make waves in the air,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.41,0:00:40.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to make a sound,\Nit takes an ear to hear it.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:40.30,0:00:42.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My question is,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:42.10,0:00:47.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if a person speaks and offers\Na TED Talk, for example,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.52,0:00:51.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and no one listens,\Nis that really communication?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:51.70,0:00:56.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I believe that listening is\Nthe missing half of communication.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:56.45,0:01:00.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is absolutely necessary\Nbut often overlooked.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:02.10,0:01:05.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We live in an age we call\Nthe Age of Communication.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:05.36,0:01:10.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Certainly, with cell phones,\Ntexts, tweets, and emails,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:10.00,0:01:12.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there is a lot of talking going on.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.22,0:01:15.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But how much listening can there really be
Dialogue: 0,0:01:17.18,0:01:20.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with so much interruption and distraction?
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.17,0:01:30.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My passion for the last 30 years\Nhas been helping people get to "yes"
Dialogue: 0,0:01:30.24,0:01:32.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in very tough negotiations.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:32.99,0:01:37.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,From family feuds to boardroom battles,\Nfrom labor strikes to civil wars.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.72,0:01:43.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I hear a lot of talking, but I don't hear\Na lot of real listening.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.10,0:01:45.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We think of negotiation\Nas being about talking.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:47.12,0:01:49.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In fact, it's really about listening.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.54,0:01:52.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you study the behavior\Nof successful negotiators,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:52.36,0:01:55.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you find that they listen\Nfar more than they talk.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:55.42,0:01:59.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After all, we're given two ears\Nand one mouth for a reason.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:59.40,0:02:03.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We should listen at least\Ntwice as much as we speak.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:03.90,0:02:09.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why listen? Why is it so important?\NLet me tell you a story.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.82,0:02:15.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Some years ago, I was in the country\Nof Venezuela serving as a third party
Dialogue: 0,0:02:15.66,0:02:18.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,between the government\Nand the political opposition
Dialogue: 0,0:02:18.52,0:02:23.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at a time of intense conflict,\Nwith a lot of people fearing a civil war.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:23.41,0:02:26.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My colleague, Francisco Diaz and I\Nhad an appointment
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.94,0:02:31.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with the President, Hugo Chavez,\Nat 9:00 PM at the Presidential Palace.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:31.48,0:02:33.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Finally, at midnight,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:33.19,0:02:35.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we were ushered in\Nto see the President
Dialogue: 0,0:02:35.13,0:02:38.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who had his entire cabinet\Narrayed behind him.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:38.33,0:02:43.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He asked me: "So, Ury, what do you think\Nof the situation going on here?"
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.87,0:02:49.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I said: "Mr. President, I've been talking\Nto your ministers here, to the opposition.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.88,0:02:52.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I think you're making some progress."
Dialogue: 0,0:02:53.35,0:02:56.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Progress? What do you mean\Nprogress?" he shouted.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:57.61,0:02:58.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"You're blind.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:58.95,0:03:02.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're not seeing all the dirty tricks\Nthose traitors are up to."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:02.50,0:03:06.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He leaned in very close to my face\Nand proceeded to shout.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:06.52,0:03:08.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What was I going to do?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:08.53,0:03:10.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Part of me felt like\Ndefending myself, naturally.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:10.86,0:03:12.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But what good would it do for me
Dialogue: 0,0:03:12.80,0:03:15.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to get into an argument\Nwith the President of Venezuela?
Dialogue: 0,0:03:15.52,0:03:16.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:16.79,0:03:21.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How would that advance peace?\NSo I just listened.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:21.20,0:03:24.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I gave him my full attention.\NI listened to where he was coming from.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:25.73,0:03:29.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,President Chavez was famous\Nfor making eight hour speeches.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:29.70,0:03:34.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After 30 minutes of me\Njust nodding and listening,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:34.87,0:03:38.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I saw his shoulders slowly sag.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:38.79,0:03:44.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He said to me in a very weary tone\Nof voice: "So, Ury, what should I do?"
Dialogue: 0,0:03:44.52,0:03:51.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's the sound of a human\Nmind opening to listen.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:51.16,0:03:53.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I said: "Mr. President,\Nit's almost Christmas.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.96,0:03:56.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The country needs a break.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:56.56,0:04:00.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Last year, all the festivities\Nwere canceled because of the conflict.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:00.62,0:04:03.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why not propose a truce this time
Dialogue: 0,0:04:03.39,0:04:06.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so that people can enjoy\Nthe holidays with their families?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:06.71,0:04:11.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After that, maybe everybody\Nwill be in a better mood to listen."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:11.44,0:04:15.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He said: "That's a great idea. I'm going\Nto announce that in my next speech."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:15.88,0:04:17.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,His mood has completely shifted.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:17.99,0:04:21.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How? Through the simple\Npower of listening.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:24.03,0:04:27.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because I listened to him,\Nhe was more ready to listen to me.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:28.83,0:04:33.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There are at least three important reasons
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.57,0:04:38.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,why it's important to listen\Nin any negotiation or conflict.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.49,0:04:43.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The first is that it helps us\Nunderstand the other side.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.30,0:04:46.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Negotiation, after all,\Nis an exercise in influence.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:47.42,0:04:50.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You're trying to change\Nsomeone else's mind.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:50.66,0:04:53.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How can you possibly change\Nsomeone else's mind
Dialogue: 0,0:04:53.67,0:04:56.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if you don't know where their mind is?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:56.72,0:04:58.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Listening is key.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:58.50,0:05:01.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The second reason is just as important.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:01.22,0:05:04.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It helps us connect with\Nthe other human being.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:04.51,0:05:09.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It helps us build rapport.\NIt builds trust. It shows we care.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:10.61,0:05:13.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After all, everybody wants to be heard.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:13.42,0:05:16.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The third reason is,\Nas with President Chavez,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:16.63,0:05:20.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it makes it more likely that the other\Nperson will listen to us.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:20.85,0:05:23.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It helps get to "yes."
Dialogue: 0,0:05:24.33,0:05:27.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In short, listening may be\Nthe cheapest concession
Dialogue: 0,0:05:27.28,0:05:29.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we can make in a negotiation.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.40,0:05:33.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It costs us nothing,\Nand it brings huge benefits.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:33.22,0:05:39.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Listening may be the golden key\Nthat opens the door to human relationship.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:39.79,0:05:41.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How do we listen?
Dialogue: 0,0:05:43.72,0:05:47.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It turns out that we often\Ntake listening for granted
Dialogue: 0,0:05:47.90,0:05:50.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as something easy and natural.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:50.16,0:05:55.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But in fact, at least in my experience,\Nreal genuine listening is something
Dialogue: 0,0:05:55.42,0:05:59.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that needs to be learned\Nand practiced every day.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:59.09,0:06:02.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In ordinary listening,\Nwe're hearing the words.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:02.93,0:06:08.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're often thinking, "Where do I agree?\NWhere do I disagree?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:08.24,0:06:13.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What am I going to say in response?"\NIn other words, the focus is on us.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:14.91,0:06:20.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In genuine listening, however,\Nthe spotlight moves to the other person.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:21.85,0:06:26.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We put ourselves in their shoes.\NWe tune into their wavelength.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:27.90,0:06:32.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We listen from within their frame\Nof reference, not just ours.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:32.91,0:06:35.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's not easy.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:35.36,0:06:39.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In genuine listening, we listen\Nnot just for what's being said,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:39.33,0:06:43.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but for what's not being said.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:43.02,0:06:48.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We listen not just to the words,\Nbut to what's behind the words.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:48.81,0:06:54.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We listen for the underlying\Nemotions, feelings, and needs.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.82,0:06:59.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We listen for what that person\Nreally needs or wants.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:59.40,0:07:01.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let me give you an example.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:01.89,0:07:07.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,About a year and a half ago, I was\Ninvited to help a Brazilian entrepreneur
Dialogue: 0,0:07:07.25,0:07:09.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by the name of Abilio Diniz.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:09.58,0:07:13.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He was trapped in a titanic legal dispute
Dialogue: 0,0:07:13.80,0:07:19.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with his French business partner over\Nthe control of Brazil's largest retailer.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:20.66,0:07:22.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Financial Times called it perhaps
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.64,0:07:29.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the biggest cross-continental boardroom\Nshowdown in recent history.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:29.03,0:07:30.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It had gone on for two and a half years.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:30.98,0:07:34.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was immensely costly and stressful,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:34.24,0:07:36.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not only to both parties\Nbut to their families
Dialogue: 0,0:07:36.98,0:07:40.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the 150,000 employees\Nof the company.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.69,0:07:45.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I sat down with Abilio\Nin his home, I listened to his story.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:45.64,0:07:47.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After that, I had a question.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:47.67,0:07:52.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I said: "Abilio, help me understand here.\NWhat do you really want?"
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.32,0:07:56.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He said: "Well, I want\Nthe stock at a certain price.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:56.52,0:07:59.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want the company headquarters.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:59.34,0:08:03.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want the elimination\Nof the non-compete clause."
Dialogue: 0,0:08:03.04,0:08:08.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He gave me a list. As I listened, I heard\Nsomething deeper there that was unspoken.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:08.44,0:08:12.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I asked him: "Abilio, you're a man\Nwho seems to have everything.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:12.38,0:08:15.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What are these things\Nreally going to give you?
Dialogue: 0,0:08:15.00,0:08:17.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What do you most want in your life?"
Dialogue: 0,0:08:17.85,0:08:20.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He paused for a moment\Nand thought about it.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:20.22,0:08:25.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Finally, he said: "Freedom.\NI want my freedom.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:25.63,0:08:28.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want to be free to pursue\Nmy business dreams.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:28.96,0:08:33.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I want to be free to spend time\Nwith my family." That was it.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:33.53,0:08:36.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was hearing the human being\Nbehind the words
Dialogue: 0,0:08:36.51,0:08:39.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not just the champion businessman.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:39.44,0:08:43.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Once we were clear about his deepest need,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:43.91,0:08:49.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then the negotiation itself,\Nwhile challenging, became a lot easier.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:49.10,0:08:52.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In four short days, my colleagues and I,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:52.35,0:08:54.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by listening to the other side,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:54.88,0:08:57.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,were able to take this titanic dispute
Dialogue: 0,0:08:57.32,0:09:02.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and resolve it with a settlement\Nthat left both sides highly satisfied.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:02.42,0:09:05.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As Abilio being a friend\Nin the process later told me,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:05.80,0:09:11.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I got everything I wanted.\NBut most importantly, I got my life back."
Dialogue: 0,0:09:11.04,0:09:16.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How did that happen?\NThrough the simple power of listening.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:19.77,0:09:26.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If listening is so useful,\Nwhy isn't everyone doing it?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:29.66,0:09:32.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,To tell you the truth, it's not so easy.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:32.100,0:09:35.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If I reflect on my own experience\Nfor a moment,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:35.57,0:09:40.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,there are times when I feel like\NI'm listening pretty well in my work,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:40.23,0:09:46.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,only to go home and find out\NI'm not listening so well to my wife.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:46.72,0:09:49.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's humbling. I can tell you.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:49.75,0:09:54.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The real problem in the way,\Nwhat makes it so hard to listen
Dialogue: 0,0:09:54.12,0:09:57.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is that there is so much\Ngoing on in our minds.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:57.87,0:10:01.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There is so much noise and distraction
Dialogue: 0,0:10:02.33,0:10:05.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that we don't have the mental\Nand emotional space
Dialogue: 0,0:10:05.34,0:10:08.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to be able to truly listen\Nto the other side.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:08.82,0:10:11.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How do we clear our minds?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:12.44,0:10:16.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It may seem odd, but the secret is,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:16.51,0:10:20.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if we want to listen to the other side,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:20.31,0:10:23.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we have to learn\Nto listen to ourselves first.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:24.70,0:10:27.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I was sitting there\Nwith President Chavez,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:27.56,0:10:31.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what really helped me\Nwas that, just beforehand,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:31.48,0:10:34.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I had taken a few moments of quiet
Dialogue: 0,0:10:34.67,0:10:37.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to pay attention to\Nwhat was going on for me.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:37.44,0:10:41.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I listened to myself to quiet my mind.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:41.11,0:10:44.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When he began shouting, I was ready.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:44.45,0:10:47.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I could notice that my cheeks\Nwere reddening,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:47.65,0:10:51.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and my jaw was a little clenched.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:51.65,0:10:54.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt some fear and anxiety.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:54.50,0:10:57.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,By paying attention\Nto those sensations and emotions,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:57.38,0:10:59.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was able to let them go,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:59.58,0:11:04.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so that I could truly listen\Nto President Chavez.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:04.15,0:11:10.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if, before an important,\Ndelicate or sensitive conversation,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:10.30,0:11:16.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we took a moment of silence just\Nto tune in and listen to where we are?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:16.50,0:11:21.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I believe that if we did that,\Nif we truly listened to ourselves first,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:21.15,0:11:24.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we would find it a lot easier\Nto listen to others.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:25.72,0:11:31.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The final question is,\Nif we listened more,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:31.00,0:11:34.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what difference would\Nit make in the world?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:34.76,0:11:38.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I believe it would make a huge difference.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:38.22,0:11:41.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In the course of my mediation work,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:41.54,0:11:45.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I personally witnessed\Nthe enormous cost of conflict,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:45.69,0:11:51.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the broken relationships, families,\Nthe stressed out work places,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:51.88,0:11:56.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the ruinous law suits,\Nand the senseless wars.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:56.22,0:12:01.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What always strikes me is\Nthe biggest opportunity we have actually,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:01.19,0:12:06.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is to prevent these conflicts\Neven before they start.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:06.24,0:12:07.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How do we do that?
Dialogue: 0,0:12:09.69,0:12:13.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's not easy, but it almost always\Nstarts with one simple step.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:13.70,0:12:17.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Listening. This is my dream.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:19.41,0:12:23.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,A listening revolution that can turn
Dialogue: 0,0:12:23.65,0:12:28.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this Age of Communication\Ninto an Age of Listening.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:29.10,0:12:32.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In other words, an age\Nof true communication.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:33.66,0:12:36.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Imagine for a moment a world
Dialogue: 0,0:12:36.12,0:12:40.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in which every child learns\Nto listen at an early age.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:41.55,0:12:46.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if we taught listening in school,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:46.21,0:12:49.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like we teach reading, as a core skill?
Dialogue: 0,0:12:49.64,0:12:52.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After all, listening\Nis how you read people.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:53.87,0:12:58.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Imagine a world in which parents\Nlearn to listen to their children.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:59.68,0:13:04.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What better way after all, is there for us\Nto teach our children to listen to us
Dialogue: 0,0:13:04.41,0:13:07.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,than for us to listen to them?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:07.04,0:13:11.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What better way for us to show\Nour children that they truly matter?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:11.39,0:13:14.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What better way is there to show our love?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:14.66,0:13:16.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As an extra bonus,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:16.32,0:13:20.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,maybe we'd see happier marriages\Nand fewer divorces,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:20.74,0:13:23.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as couples learned\Nto listen to each other.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:23.89,0:13:28.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Imagine a world in which leaders\Nlearned how to listen to their people.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:29.58,0:13:36.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if we chose leaders based\Non their ability to listen, not just talk?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:36.83,0:13:40.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if listening became\Nthe norm in our organizations
Dialogue: 0,0:13:40.87,0:13:42.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and not just the exception?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:43.87,0:13:45.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if on radio and TV
Dialogue: 0,0:13:45.94,0:13:49.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we had not just talk shows,\Nbut listen shows?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:49.43,0:13:51.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:13:52.67,0:13:57.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What if we had not just\Npeace talks, but peace listens?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:58.98,0:14:02.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I firmly believe that we'd get\Nto 'yes' a lot more often.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:04.17,0:14:07.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We might not eliminate all conflict,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:07.25,0:14:11.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but we would avert\Na lot of fights and wars.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:11.26,0:14:14.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everybody would be much better off.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:14.91,0:14:17.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I, very happily, might be out of a job.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:19.40,0:14:21.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's my dream.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:21.32,0:14:26.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,While it may seem audacious,\Nit's not that complicated.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:26.33,0:14:29.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Listening can be a chain reaction
Dialogue: 0,0:14:29.49,0:14:34.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in which each person\Nwho is genuinely listened to
Dialogue: 0,0:14:34.16,0:14:38.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,feels naturally inspired\Nto listen to the next.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:39.35,0:14:41.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Listening can be contagious.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:42.94,0:14:46.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I invite you to start
Dialogue: 0,0:14:46.68,0:14:50.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,this chain reaction today,\Nright here, right now.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:52.03,0:14:55.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In your next conversation\Nwith a colleague,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:55.52,0:15:01.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,client, partner, or child,\Na friend or a stranger,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:01.47,0:15:05.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,give them your full attention.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:05.47,0:15:09.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Listen to the human being\Nbehind the words.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:09.33,0:15:16.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One of the biggest gifts we can give\Nanyone is the gift of being heard.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:17.10,0:15:21.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,With the simple power of listening now,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:21.59,0:15:25.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we can transform our relationships,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:25.14,0:15:31.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,our families, and our world\Nfor the better, ear by ear.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:31.80,0:15:34.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you for listening.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:34.55,0:15:36.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)