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← "Taboo" - Ep. 4 of RANDOM COMEDIES

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Showing Revision 2 created 07/16/2011 by joesackett.

  1. That was great, you guys.
  2. Thank you!
  3. Delicious! Thank you.
  4. I had a little help.
  5. Yes, you did!
  6. So, what’s on the agenda, you guys?
  7. Chuck promised we’d play Taboo!
  8. -Oooh! -I did.
  9. Yeah!
  10. We need some more drinks.
  11. I'll have another glass of wine.
  12. I will have a wine cooler.
  13. This one loves her wine coolers.
  14. I do.
  15. So, how long have you two been dating?
  16. We met on Craigslist two months ago.
  17. Oh.
  18. -Nice. -Yeah.
  19. That’s sweet.
  20. We hit it off right away.
  21. I gave him a hand job in the backseat of his Chevy Cavalier.
  22. It only took like four seconds.
  23. Oh.
  24. Alright! It's game time!
  25. Can you believe I’ve never played Taboo before?
  26. Virgin.
  27. -Really? -No?
  28. Uh, you try to get your partner
  29. to say the word on the top of the card
  30. without saying any of these words below.
  31. Pretty simple?
  32. Yeah, we like to tell each other personal stories
  33. so that we can avoid the buzz words.
  34. I just say the first thing that comes to mind.
  35. We can give you a little sample.
  36. -Um... -Why don't you go.
  37. When we go on a trip to a foreign nation
  38. we have to sign this.
  39. Uh, passport!
  40. -Yay! -Yeah!
  41. -We can totally do that! -We can totally do this.
  42. Okay, practice round for us.
  43. When you slumber, you’re on this.
  44. On our backs.
  45. -No, um... -Okay.
  46. -This is a... -On the fronts.
  47. No.
  48. This is a place that we rest on.
  49. On the urine. You pee the bed.
  50. No.
  51. Premature ejaculation.
  52. On the wet spot! On the wet spot.
  53. Oh wow! Um, mattress, guys. The word was mattress.
  54. Okay, then.
  55. Babe, I’m supposed to guess it.
  56. Okay, I think it’s, uh, it’s our turn.
  57. (BUZZZZ!)
  58. Uh, okay! We almost got a ticket.
  59. ATTA, GIRL!
  60. Woo!
  61. Come on, baby. Stay with me, stay with me.
  62. Oh! Nnn--I said it.
  63. Um, you sprayed ass all over the toilet.
  64. Last Tuesday! Dinner. Nnnn!
  65. The stuff inside! The stuff inside!
  66. The corn.
  67. Yes!
  68. Ah! I drew you a diagram of my noonie
  69. so you could find my spot.
  70. (BUZZ!)
  71. Okay, fine! I said the word. I'm sorry.
  72. Whitney, um, please
  73. do you maybe want to tone it down just a little bit.
  74. I will. I’m toning it down.
  75. Okay. Your mom, she breast fed you ‘til you were this age.
  76. Really, honey? Really?
  77. Yeah, yeah!
  78. Baby! Come on!
  79. Five.
  80. Um, I think that’s time.
  81. Um, no! Say it! What was that?
  82. I was five.
  83. Guys, that’s time!
  84. Right here. Your time’s up.
  85. Really. Of all the clues for the word “five.”
  86. Yeah, I--
  87. Look, we’re up! We’re up. We’re up! Just me and you, Rose.
  88. It’s normal...
  89. In some countries.
  90. What’s with your clues?
  91. They’re great. We’re winning.
  92. Why can’t we play more like them?
  93. Um, when you ordered on the online pharmacy
  94. this was declined.
  95. Insufficient funds.
  96. Come on, baby. The Rogaine.
  97. You were pissed you couldn’t get the Rogaine!
  98. Why don’t you pass on this one?
  99. Wh--no! It was declined!
  100. What gets declined?
  101. My credit card.
  102. That’s right!
  103. Your hair is soft and full, really.
  104. Thank you.
  105. Okay.
  106. This is a, um...
  107. You have a skull blank on your hiney.
  108. I don’t even have any tattoos.
  109. Thank you. Tattoo.
  110. Oh! G-d that’s right.
  111. I was thinking of Julio.
  112. And time.
  113. Um, leaving our past behind us.
  114. Thank G-d mine’s locked up in prison.
  115. What?
  116. What are you doing?
  117. What’s your problem?
  118. What’s my problem? What’s your problem?
  119. You’re telling all my secrets, and what’s with that ex-con?
  120. First of all,
  121. there’s nothing to worry about because he is locked up.
  122. Let’s just have fun!
  123. This is not fun. Not fun!
  124. Um...We’re out of time.
  125. You know, we should hit the road.
  126. -Yeah. -No!
  127. I’m, uh, getting pretty beaten up here.
  128. Anyway, it’s getting late.
  129. Come on! We didn’t even finish the round!
  130. You’ll give the clues to me.
  131. Alright!
  132. SPERM WHALE
  133. You can do it!
  134. I’m gonna pass.
  135. TEA BAG
  136. Not going there either.
  137. Okay, honey, when you pass, though, we lose a point.
  138. NOODLE
  139. Alright.
  140. It’s edible.
  141. It’s long.
  142. Kind of limp, I guess.
  143. Oh.
  144. It’s flimsy.
  145. Your penis when you can’t get it up?
  146. Noodle.
  147. The fucking word is noodle!
  148. Okay. Wow! Watch your language.
  149. Okay. This is a good stopping place.
  150. Oh!
  151. Well, thanks for having us.
  152. Yeah, it was a memorable night.
  153. Hold on. Where are you going? And wait, no!
  154. I mean, fuck!
  155. Next week, Parcheesi?
  156. I was a virgin. You took my virginity.
  157. Put these back?
  158. I’m gonna need the--
  159. Oh, wanna put this back?
  160. No, um...
  161. YAY!
  162. (Random Comedies stand alone.)
  163. You sprayed ass all over the toilet.
  164. (Don’t look for a connection.)
  165. (‘Cuz there’s none.)
  166. The customer with the white woman has decided...
  167. Can I call you “Whore”?
  168. Yeah, but I also have this sign, and I’m not gonna do that!
  169. (They’re just random.)