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Kiersten Beigel: Good[br]afternoon, everybody.

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This is Kiersten Beigel.

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I'm with the Office of Head[br]Start, and I would love

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to welcome you this afternoon[br](or midday or morning,

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as the case may be[br]for some of you).

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I'm going to be your[br]moderator for this webinar,

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"Father Engagement is[br]Everybody's Business",

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and I am absolutely thrilled[br]to be able to do that.

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We have a lot going on this week[br]at the Office of Head Start,

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as you know since you[br]registered for this webinar.

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This is part of a series[br]of resources/events

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that are happening the[br]week before Father's Day,

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and we're really excited to be able

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to offer the field some new[br]resources to support the work

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that we do in partnering with[br]fathers in our programs --

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Head Start and Early[br]Head Start programs.

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So, before we get[br]going I'm going to --

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let's do a little tech talk here.

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I wanted to remind you you[br]can use your computer speakers

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to hear the webinar.

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If you can't hear the presenters[br]you can, of course, always attempt

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to turn on your computer speakers.

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And if you're having[br]problems with your speakers,

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or they're not working, you can --

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we've got a phone number here[br]in the public chat that Natalie,

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who's our webinar coordinator,[br]put up for everybody.

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So, you can see that[br]in the public chat.

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It's a number with a[br]dial in that you can call

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in if you're having trouble.

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I also wanted to direct you to Sam.

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Sam has his own tab next[br]to the public-private tab.

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There's a Sam tab.

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And if you are having any trouble,[br]any kind of technical issues,

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you can do some private chatting[br]with Sam and he'll help you out.

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So, that's our tech talk.

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I wanted to tell you that we[br]have a pretty interactive session

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for you today.

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We're really excited.

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We have a pretty laid back group[br]of folks, who are very passionate

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about their work with[br]fathers, to say the least.

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And I think they're going to keep[br]it pretty conversational so this --

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we may be doing a little[br]webinar free styling here,

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a little different than[br]the usual style of webinar.

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And they're also excited to get[br]to know a little bit about you.

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We'll be doing some polling[br]questions, asking you to weigh in,

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and they'll guide you[br]when it's time to do that.

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So, now I would like to give[br]you a chance to hear from them.

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They're going to introduce[br]themselves, and we'll start

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with David who is in the[br]upper left hand corner here.

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And if you guys could just tell[br]us who you are and a little bit

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about your connection[br]with this work.

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David Jones: Okay,[br]thank you Kiersten.

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Welcome everyone.

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I'm so excited that[br]you're all participating

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with us on this webinar.

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My name is David Jones.

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I am the Fatherhood Specialist[br]here in the Office of Head Start.

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I co-lead all of our fatherhood[br]efforts with Kiersten Beigel.

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And I have about 15 to 20 years

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of experience providing services[br]directly, indirectly for fathers,

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individual work, group work,[br]you name it, within the context

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of Early Head Start, Head Start,

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and also as a consultant[br]to other programs.

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So welcome.

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John Hornstein: Okay,[br]I'm John Hornstein.

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I'm on the upper right hand side,[br]the one with the glasses up there.

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I'm delighted to be working with[br]David and Ed and Kiersten on this.

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I work at the National[br]Center for Parent, Family,

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and Community Engagement and[br]have been doing fatherhood work

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for over 30 years.

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And kind of backed into it[br]when -- at a time when --

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I remember very distinctly the[br]first time I said to myself,

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"I've got to do more about[br]this," was at a conference

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when the keynote speaker[br]was asked, well,

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what do you do with fathers then?

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And the speaker said, "well,

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nothing because they[br]don't show up."

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So, that got me not laid back,

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as Kiersten said,[br]but quite passionate.

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So, I'll move onto Ed.

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[Foreign Language]

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Edwin Cheromiah: This is --[br]my name is Edwin Cheromiah,

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and I just greeted you

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in our Pueblo Laguna[br]language, the Keres language.

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I was just wishing[br]everybody a good afternoon.

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Also again, I've been with the[br]Pueblo Laguna Fatherhood Program

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through the Laguna Head Start[br]for the past eight years.

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Way back in 2004, these men -- a[br]few men got together and wanted

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to have fathers more engaged.

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So it went through[br]PFS first of all,

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but then finally came[br]into Head Start.

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That's where I've been,

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that's where I was[br]hired for this position.

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And I continue to offer[br]services for dads, you know,

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resources to different programs[br]that we have here in Laguna,

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and also offering[br]them just the support

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that sometimes fathers[br]need to move forward.

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And it's a pleasure[br]to be with you today.

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Kiersten: So how we're really --

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you might have heard[br]some of our muted voices.

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We were really excited to see[br]folks rolling in, and we have well

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over 1,000 people register for[br]this, which is very telling

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about how interested people[br]are in father engagement.

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So, today what we're going to[br]do is about an hour and a half.

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And I'm going to monitoring chat.

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So, as questions come up along the[br]way, we might stop and take some

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of those, or I might[br]make some decisions

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about holding those[br]towards the end.

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But, what we're going to do is[br]reflect kind of on where we are now

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and where we hope to go in[br]building supportive partnerships

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with fathers, think a little bit[br]about sort of the movement --

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of the fatherhood movement and how[br]things have evolved in Head Start

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with regards to father engagement.

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And we want to renew our enthusiasm[br]and commitment to this work.

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We want to identify some ways[br]to build father engagement

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that is systemic,[br]integrated and comprehensive,

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and we'll talk more[br]about what that means.

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And we hope to share some[br]new resources for you.

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Some of the resources that[br]are coming out this week

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that you may use to improve your[br]program practice with fathers.

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So, without further ado,[br]I turn it over to David.

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David: Hi, so we're going to begin[br]with our first polling question,

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which is a two part question.

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We want to get a feel for,[br]you know, the participants

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on the call today, so we'd like[br]to ask that everyone participate.

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So, Natalie can you please[br]go ahead and launch the poll?

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[ Background Noise ]

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David: And the first[br]question is, what is your role

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within the Head Start program?

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So, we'd like for everyone to[br]sort of take a moment and click

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on the choice that best[br]fits the role that you have

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in the program within[br]where you work.

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If - obviously, if you're not

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within a Head Start program you can[br]choose one of the other options.

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We'll give you a few[br]seconds to do that.

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[ Background Noise ]

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David: And Natalie, I'm[br]not sure in terms of time,

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but give them a couple more seconds

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and then we can take[br]a look at the results.

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[ Background Noise ]

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David: Okay, can we see[br]results from the first question?

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Wow, so it looks like about[br]26 percent of you are family

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and community partnership staff,

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11 percent are parent involvement[br]staff, and then just sort of mix

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of sort of directors, sort[br]of leadership in the program.

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We actually have some focused male[br]involvement staff, health staff.

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So, this is great and this[br]sort of connects with the title

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of this webinar, which[br]is, you know,

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"Father Engagement is[br]Everybody's Business"

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so this is really nice to see.

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So, can we move now to[br]the next polling question?

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[ Background Noise ]

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David: Okay, it's going[br]to come up in a second.

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[ Background Noise ]

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David: So, what is your gender?

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[ Background Noise ]

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David: Take a few moments,[br]make your selection.

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[ Background Noise ]

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David: And the one[br]thing I want to say

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about the previous[br]polling question is, again,

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irrespective of your role[br]within the program, you know,

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everyone can make a meaningful[br]contribution to working with,

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supporting and engaging fathers.

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John: Uh huh.

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David: That's one of the[br]things that we really want

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to underscore with today's webinar.

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Okay, can we see the[br]results please, Natalie?

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[ Background Noise ]

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David: It takes a[br]couple of seconds.

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>> David: Ah.

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>> John: Wow.

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>> John: You know that leaves a[br]certain percentage unaccounted for.

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>> David: Yeah.

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>> John: But still, the proportion[br]is pretty interesting isn't it?

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>> David: It is.

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It is and I mean this is[br]really important for us

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because again we want to make[br]sure that we're being thoughtful

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in terms of how we respond, how[br]we present and what we're saying.

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We have a sense that you know[br]our programs are predominantly

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populated by female staff,[br]but we just want to make sure

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that we're being thoughtful and[br]sensitive to the entire audience.

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So, thank you so much[br]for your participation.

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Natalie, you can go ahead[br]and close that poll.

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[ Background Noise ]

0:10:00.566,0:10:04.176
John: What it also says David[br]is the majority of conversations

0:10:04.176,0:10:09.726
with fathers are between[br]female staff and fathers.

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David: That's right.

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John: Yeah.

0:10:13.726,0:10:15.726
David: That's right.

0:10:15.726,0:10:17.726
And so, it speaks to and[br]underscores the importance of,

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sort of, what happens when those[br]opportunities present themselves

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in terms of what we do with them.

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So, we're waiting[br]for the next slide.

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And while we're waiting,[br]basically what we're going

0:10:29.536,0:10:32.126
to do moving forward is just[br]going to be really reflecting

0:10:32.126,0:10:34.466
on fatherhood and Head Start[br]and Early Head Start and sort

0:10:34.466,0:10:38.296
of talking a little bit about[br]the historical evolution

0:10:38.946,0:10:40.946
of the fatherhood[br]movement within Head Start.

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[ Background Noise ]

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David: Seems -- we may be having[br]a little technical difficulty.

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John: I've -- David:[br]Do you see the slide?

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John: Yeah, but I[br]clicked on the tab

0:10:56.576,0:10:59.836
at the top that'll put me[br]back to father engagement.

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I did -- David: Okay.

0:11:01.836,0:11:03.836
So, I just did the same thing.

0:11:03.836,0:11:07.376
So, I mean there's a lot that we[br]can cover to address, you know,

0:11:07.376,0:11:11.476
why fatherhood evolved[br]in the way that it has.

0:11:11.476,0:11:14.996
You know, we can sort of[br]ask ourselves some questions

0:11:14.996,0:11:16.996
about the role the women played.

0:11:17.166,0:11:21.476
And let me say that women have been[br]exceptional in their understanding

0:11:22.036,0:11:24.806
and support of the movement[br]to support father engagement.

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And I think were it not for their[br]initial insight and their fortitude

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and support, I'm not[br]certain we would have evolved

0:11:33.946,0:11:35.946
to where we have today.

0:11:35.946,0:11:37.946
John: Yeah.

0:11:37.946,0:11:39.946
David: You know, they[br]had to allow men in.

0:11:39.946,0:11:41.946
John: Right.

0:11:41.946,0:11:43.946
David: And then what about the men?

0:11:43.946,0:11:45.946
John: Yeah.

0:11:45.946,0:11:47.946
David: I think they had to[br]dare to be different and step

0:11:47.946,0:11:53.176
out of their comfort zone, but what[br]is important is involving fathers.

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Initially, we got to a place[br]where in the awareness stage what

0:11:57.566,0:12:02.176
that meant was that we were not[br]only asking more from fathers,

0:12:02.176,0:12:04.826
but we were also asking more[br]from programs and from staff.

0:12:04.986,0:12:08.166
So, that means everybody had to[br]be a little bit different in terms

0:12:08.166,0:12:10.166
of the way that they were[br]working and what they did.

0:12:10.166,0:12:14.076
In the second stage, the[br]acknowledging stage, you know,

0:12:14.226,0:12:17.636
programs -- we began to believe[br]that programs needed sort

0:12:17.636,0:12:21.736
of an adjunct or separate services[br]for fathers in order for them

0:12:21.736,0:12:24.256
to be effective, in order[br]for them to meaningful.

0:12:24.686,0:12:27.176
And I think at the[br]time, John and Ed

0:12:27.176,0:12:29.176
if you agree, that was appropriate.

0:12:29.176,0:12:31.176
John: Sure.

0:12:31.176,0:12:33.176
David: Until we began[br]to see what happened

0:12:33.176,0:12:37.506
when the father involvement[br]staff left the organization.

0:12:38.816,0:12:41.636
You know sometimes the -- all[br]the great effort, the great work

0:12:41.636,0:12:43.976
that had gone into producing[br]this program sort of went

0:12:43.976,0:12:45.976
out the door with that individual.

0:12:45.976,0:12:49.466
So, we've evolved now in our[br]thinking to not only expect

0:12:50.026,0:12:53.076
that staff build relationships with[br]fathers and that fathers engage.

0:12:53.076,0:12:57.146
We are suggesting that fully[br]integrating services for fathers

0:12:58.056,0:13:01.646
as a component of overall[br]services is not only appropriate,

0:13:02.156,0:13:04.976
but it can contribute to[br]sustainable service provision

0:13:05.476,0:13:07.546
when we make fatherhood[br]everybody's business.

0:13:07.546,0:13:09.546
John: Uh huh.

0:13:09.546,0:13:11.546
David: And it's important to note

0:13:11.546,0:13:13.546
that initially you know[br]some fathers were hesitant,

0:13:13.546,0:13:15.786
almost reluctant, for[br]very valid reasons.

0:13:16.306,0:13:19.086
You know there were some cultural[br]reasons for their distance

0:13:19.206,0:13:22.466
from educational programs as well[br]as some of the systemic stuff

0:13:22.516,0:13:24.516
that we're all aware of.

0:13:24.516,0:13:26.516
But, in some cases we have fathers

0:13:26.516,0:13:28.516
who have received incredible[br]support and guidance

0:13:28.886,0:13:31.426
from their own fathers, and[br]they drew from that experience,

0:13:31.946,0:13:34.406
and it was easy to really work[br]with them and talk to them

0:13:34.406,0:13:36.836
about what was important[br]for them as fathers.

0:13:36.946,0:13:39.956
And then we had the other end[br]of the spectrum with fathers

0:13:39.956,0:13:44.046
that did not have that[br]experience that were committed

0:13:44.256,0:13:46.366
to doing something[br]different for their children

0:13:46.366,0:13:48.366
than what they received.

0:13:48.366,0:13:50.366
John, would you like[br]to say -- John: Yeah.

0:13:50.366,0:13:52.366
David: Anything about the[br]connections and opportunities

0:13:52.366,0:13:54.676
for connections at the[br]different developmental stages?

0:13:54.856,0:13:56.856
John: Yeah sure.

0:13:56.856,0:14:00.986
I mean I think this is a great[br]kind of reflection on the history.

0:14:00.986,0:14:03.716
And I -- the other day I[br]was wondering, you know,

0:14:04.016,0:14:07.306
what did fathers themselves[br]have to do with this change?

0:14:07.306,0:14:11.586
And I think fathers themselves[br]are expecting more of programs

0:14:11.586,0:14:13.786
because society as[br]a whole has changed.

0:14:14.216,0:14:17.496
But, I think, one of the[br]things about expectations is

0:14:17.496,0:14:21.286
that it may feel really different[br]at different ages, what --

0:14:21.776,0:14:25.416
the kind of connection[br]you can make with a father

0:14:25.416,0:14:27.416
when he brings an[br]infant to a program,

0:14:27.416,0:14:29.936
or when you do a home[br]visit, is quite different

0:14:29.936,0:14:32.466
than that father whose thinking

0:14:32.466,0:14:36.346
of their four year[br]old as a ball player.

0:14:36.736,0:14:40.976
So, I think there is a lot of[br]complexity to this process.

0:14:41.196,0:14:46.056
But I also think that this[br]idea that somehow everybody --

0:14:46.056,0:14:50.596
that full engagement means really[br]thinking about every aspect

0:14:50.596,0:14:54.306
of the program as being something[br]that fathers are involved with

0:14:54.746,0:14:58.916
and that it's not a[br]distinct and separate thing.

0:14:58.916,0:15:00.916
I think that's an important thing.

0:15:00.916,0:15:02.916
At the same time there may be[br]some things that are distinctly

0:15:02.916,0:15:05.746
for fathers, and those[br]shouldn't end necessarily.

0:15:06.116,0:15:08.116
David: That's a really good point.

0:15:08.546,0:15:12.586
>> Yeah. David: So, as we[br]consider what we mean or, sort of,

0:15:12.586,0:15:15.716
what we're thinking about when we[br]talk about moving from involvement

0:15:16.116,0:15:18.736
to engagement, as you[br]can see from this slide.

0:15:18.736,0:15:22.886
You know a lot of times, in[br]my experience sort of being

0:15:22.886,0:15:26.696
in a program, sort of leading[br]the evolution of a program

0:15:26.696,0:15:30.036
that became more father friendly,[br]consulting with other programs

0:15:30.036,0:15:32.596
that were beginning or attempting[br]to start fatherhood initiatives.

0:15:32.986,0:15:35.736
Programs tend to gravitate[br]to do what comes easy

0:15:36.016,0:15:38.856
or what satisfies program's goals

0:15:38.856,0:15:41.496
of actually having[br]a fathers' event.

0:15:41.526,0:15:44.746
And that's not to say that[br]these events are not meaningful

0:15:44.746,0:15:47.396
and they don't provide[br]opportunities for connectedness,

0:15:47.536,0:15:49.796
but tying the event to a process

0:15:49.796,0:15:52.756
that facilitates ongoing[br]opportunities for connectedness

0:15:53.246,0:15:55.956
and relationship building is[br]the key with the goal in mind

0:15:55.956,0:15:59.536
of learning about how you[br]know fathers think and feel

0:15:59.536,0:16:03.046
about their role as parents[br]and what's important to them

0:16:03.046,0:16:05.046
in relationship to their[br]child's development.

0:16:05.606,0:16:10.076
You know, we are at a place where[br]we want staff to extend themselves

0:16:10.076,0:16:12.646
and seek opportunities to connect.

0:16:12.766,0:16:17.166
There's so many routines[br]and complimentary supports

0:16:17.586,0:16:20.526
within Head Start that provide[br]opportunities to connect

0:16:20.526,0:16:24.876
with fathers that can result[br]in systemic, integrated

0:16:24.876,0:16:27.716
and comprehensive services,[br]as shown on this slide.

0:16:27.756,0:16:30.966
You know, we encourage you to dig

0:16:30.966,0:16:33.126
into the resources that's[br]being released this week

0:16:33.126,0:16:38.166
and begin assessing your programs'[br]current services, the intersections

0:16:38.166,0:16:41.506
and or opportunities for[br]connections with fathers, you know,

0:16:41.506,0:16:43.506
at times of pickup and drop off.

0:16:43.896,0:16:46.326
You know, if families transition

0:16:46.326,0:16:48.326
and then I know there's[br]this process where a lot

0:16:48.326,0:16:52.396
of families transition into Head[br]Start or Early Head Start initially

0:16:52.396,0:16:54.396
in home-based and they move

0:16:54.396,0:16:56.396
into a center-based[br]option if that available.

0:16:57.836,0:17:00.676
There's a significant change in[br]the amount of time that you have

0:17:00.676,0:17:03.856
to communicate with families when[br]they're in home-based juxtaposed

0:17:03.856,0:17:06.096
to center-based during[br]pickup and drop off.

0:17:06.096,0:17:08.915
So, staff have to be really[br]crafty about seizing the moments

0:17:09.386,0:17:11.386
and taking advantage[br]of those opportunities

0:17:11.386,0:17:13.496
to communicate with families.

0:17:14.106,0:17:16.526
John: Can you go back?

0:17:16.746,0:17:18.746
David: Sure.

0:17:18.746,0:17:20.746
John: Is it possible to go back?

0:17:20.746,0:17:22.746
David: Of course.

0:17:22.746,0:17:24.746
John: Because I want to put[br]an X right there, alright.

0:17:24.746,0:17:26.746
David: Okay.

0:17:26.746,0:17:28.886
John: And there's some interesting[br]research on mothers and fathers

0:17:28.886,0:17:33.296
when they drop off[br]kids at childcare.

0:17:33.766,0:17:37.836
And one of things they've found is[br]that after a problem, I'm sure many

0:17:37.836,0:17:40.706
of you have seen situations[br]where the child kind

0:17:40.706,0:17:45.736
of has a hard time transitioning[br]in and cries and both the parent

0:17:45.736,0:17:47.736
and the child have difficulty.

0:17:47.736,0:17:51.366
So, in this research they called[br]up both mothers and fathers

0:17:51.366,0:17:54.856
like 10 minutes or so after[br]they dropped the child off

0:17:54.996,0:17:58.546
and what they found was that[br]when it was a problematic one,

0:17:58.546,0:18:01.756
when it was a separation[br]issue, both mothers

0:18:01.756,0:18:04.476
and fathers were still upset.

0:18:04.826,0:18:06.826
They were still really concerned.

0:18:07.086,0:18:11.066
The difference was, was that the[br]mothers typically had somebody

0:18:11.066,0:18:13.846
to talk to about it[br]and the fathers didn't.

0:18:13.846,0:18:18.406
So, you know, what David said[br]about these particular times

0:18:18.406,0:18:21.186
to make a connection,[br]that time when the,

0:18:21.556,0:18:24.356
with the difficult drop off,[br]that may be a great time

0:18:24.356,0:18:28.026
to build a connection[br]with a father.

0:18:28.206,0:18:30.206
Now, you can move the slide.

0:18:30.206,0:18:32.206
David: Make a point.

0:18:32.206,0:18:37.706
John: I just wanted to use the[br]X. David: This is yours, John.

0:18:38.156,0:18:40.156
John: Okay, yeah.

0:18:40.156,0:18:42.156
So, and this kind of gets[br]to what I was talking about,

0:18:42.156,0:18:46.256
is these barriers to involvement[br]and engagement are different.

0:18:46.256,0:18:50.476
So, involvement is, like,[br]what's getting in the way as far

0:18:50.476,0:18:52.476
as just a physical thing, you know?

0:18:52.476,0:18:54.476
Is it transportation?

0:18:54.476,0:18:57.186
Is it ability to make[br]it to the program?

0:18:57.486,0:19:01.646
It's all kinds of these almost[br]physical kind of barriers,

0:19:01.646,0:19:06.156
whereas the barriers to true[br]engagement, to a true partnership

0:19:06.196,0:19:09.776
with fathers is really[br]more internal.

0:19:09.996,0:19:14.396
It's more, what am I bringing[br]to these relationships?

0:19:14.396,0:19:17.236
What do I believe that[br]the father believes

0:19:17.236,0:19:20.286
about the program or[br]about child rearing?

0:19:20.556,0:19:24.366
So, it's more this internal[br]stuff that's in the way

0:19:24.366,0:19:26.366
of fully engaging with fathers.

0:19:26.366,0:19:28.436
And so, when we get to[br]professional development,

0:19:28.636,0:19:31.526
that's what we're going[br]to want to think about.

0:19:31.526,0:19:35.376
So, you know, what is in[br]the way of a father walking

0:19:35.376,0:19:40.566
across the threshold into a[br]program or actually participating

0:19:40.566,0:19:44.666
in a meeting when there's an issue?

0:19:44.666,0:19:50.306
So, I think that we're moving[br]to thinking in a deeper way

0:19:50.306,0:19:52.696
about how we form[br]these partnerships.

0:19:53.916,0:19:56.566
So, yeah, so now we can[br]move to the research.

0:19:57.156,0:20:00.556
David: Well John, before we move

0:20:01.256,0:20:03.336
to the research slide[br]-- John: Yeah, yeah.

0:20:03.376,0:20:07.436
David: I would just like to[br]add a little conversation

0:20:08.336,0:20:10.336
about this last bullet.

0:20:10.816,0:20:12.816
John: Okay.

0:20:12.816,0:20:14.816
Oh, you're using the star.

0:20:14.816,0:20:16.816
I see. David: Getting fancy here.

0:20:17.686,0:20:22.186
You know this is where a lot of[br]the work really happens with staff

0:20:22.186,0:20:24.516
as it relates to professional[br]development when we start

0:20:24.516,0:20:26.516
to think about the barriers.

0:20:26.516,0:20:28.516
John: Yeah.

0:20:28.516,0:20:30.516
David: I think it's important[br]for us to really acknowledge

0:20:30.516,0:20:32.516
and accept the fact[br]that it is difficult

0:20:32.516,0:20:36.876
and that it may take[br]time and effort.

0:20:36.876,0:20:39.546
You know in the fatherhood[br]resource that we're releasing today

0:20:39.546,0:20:43.816
on the ECLKC on page 22[br]there's really nice quotes

0:20:43.816,0:20:48.736
from a staff member that speaks to[br]her beliefs about the father's role

0:20:49.386,0:20:53.216
and who she felt she should be[br]talking to about child development.

0:20:53.706,0:20:57.256
And how with good staff[br]training, peer support

0:20:57.766,0:21:02.256
and supervision she was able to[br]change her belief system and begin

0:21:02.256,0:21:04.876
to look at other personal[br]and professional biases

0:21:04.876,0:21:06.876
that were affecting[br]her work with fathers.

0:21:06.876,0:21:08.876
John: Yeah, yeah.

0:21:08.876,0:21:10.876
That's -- David: I think that's[br]just a really important point

0:21:10.876,0:21:12.876
to make that we know that this[br]work there's some complex issues.

0:21:13.186,0:21:15.366
And moving from one place

0:21:15.366,0:21:18.126
to the next will take some[br]time, energy and effort.

0:21:18.486,0:21:20.486
John: Yeah.

0:21:20.486,0:21:23.926
And David, so much of that[br]stuff thus sets the beliefs

0:21:23.926,0:21:28.276
about what my role as a parent[br]or my role in communicating

0:21:28.276,0:21:31.216
to a parent about which[br]issues is pretty deep stuff.

0:21:31.216,0:21:33.216
We're not necessarily[br]conscious of it.

0:21:33.216,0:21:35.216
We just do it.

0:21:35.216,0:21:37.216
David: Right.

0:21:37.216,0:21:39.216
John: It's something that's[br]culturally formed in us.

0:21:39.216,0:21:41.216
And so, I think some of it[br]is just acknowledging that

0:21:41.216,0:21:43.216
and bringing it to the surface.

0:21:43.216,0:21:45.216
So, yeah it's a really good point.

0:21:45.216,0:21:47.216
David: And the trust that[br]has to be involved in terms

0:21:47.216,0:21:49.216
of the relationship with your[br]supervisor to get to a place

0:21:49.216,0:21:51.216
where you're actually beginning to[br]wrestle with some of those issues.

0:21:51.216,0:21:53.216
John: Exactly, yeah.

0:21:53.216,0:21:55.216
David: Okay.

0:21:55.216,0:21:59.706
John: Okay, so the research says a[br]lot and to try to put the research

0:21:59.706,0:22:03.146
on fatherhood on one[br]slide is very difficult.

0:22:03.676,0:22:07.556
And before I get into[br]this, I'd like to say

0:22:07.556,0:22:12.396
that this might feel[br]a little offensive

0:22:12.596,0:22:15.636
to some people, and that's okay.

0:22:15.976,0:22:21.606
But, part of it is that[br]this doesn't say anything

0:22:21.606,0:22:23.606
about women really.

0:22:23.866,0:22:27.726
And when I say well, fathers[br]make important contributions

0:22:27.726,0:22:29.726
to children's development.

0:22:29.726,0:22:32.626
Well that doesn't mean that mothers[br]don't make the same contributions,

0:22:33.256,0:22:36.216
or that mothers in some cases[br]make the same contributions

0:22:36.216,0:22:38.896
that fathers do, or some[br]fathers that mothers do.

0:22:38.926,0:22:42.436
So, I think this you know it's[br]not as like you know one --

0:22:42.666,0:22:44.686
two sided as it may seem.

0:22:45.126,0:22:47.726
So, I just want to you know[br]make that disclaimer first

0:22:47.726,0:22:50.636
because I think this can start[br]feeling like oh, dads do this

0:22:50.636,0:22:53.276
and mothers do this when,[br]in fact, it gets mixed

0:22:53.276,0:22:55.276
up a lot more than we might think.

0:22:55.356,0:22:58.906
The first bullet is[br]men are fully capable

0:22:58.906,0:23:00.906
of nurturing young children.

0:23:00.906,0:23:02.906
We know that.

0:23:02.906,0:23:04.906
We know that throughout history.

0:23:04.906,0:23:06.906
Men have nurtured young children.

0:23:06.906,0:23:09.966
In some societies men play a[br]larger role in the nurturance.

0:23:10.086,0:23:14.546
In many societies that's[br]changing, but men's brains respond

0:23:14.546,0:23:18.426
to a babies cry the same[br]way women's brains do.

0:23:18.426,0:23:21.206
The same parts of the brain get[br]activated when they hear a cry.

0:23:21.586,0:23:25.866
Society has helped them figure out[br]what to do when they hear that cry,

0:23:26.276,0:23:29.626
but the neurological[br]phenomenon is the same.

0:23:30.246,0:23:33.956
Men naturally raise their[br]voices to a higher pitch

0:23:33.956,0:23:35.956
when they're talking to infants.

0:23:36.066,0:23:38.686
Of course, if you ask them[br]whether they are they might say

0:23:38.686,0:23:40.686
"no, I'm not doing that".

0:23:40.686,0:23:42.686
But, then they go "ooh[br]yeah, [inaudible]".

0:23:42.846,0:23:47.416
So, you know there are things[br]that men are very capable

0:23:47.416,0:23:49.416
of nurturing young children.

0:23:49.416,0:23:53.286
Another point on this one is that[br]men tend to look more nurturant

0:23:53.286,0:23:56.736
with young children when[br]there aren't women there.

0:23:57.046,0:24:01.736
That when there's not, and I would[br]attribute it to well, you know,

0:24:01.736,0:24:05.386
there's some role definition[br]going on here and I'm going

0:24:05.386,0:24:07.386
to you know play this role.

0:24:07.386,0:24:11.636
But, we find in general that[br]when there aren't women near,

0:24:11.636,0:24:13.636
men show more nurturance.

0:24:13.636,0:24:16.906
The second bullet, and this[br]could go on and on and on,

0:24:16.906,0:24:21.526
and some of this material is in[br]the guide that David referred to,

0:24:21.976,0:24:26.626
fathers make important[br]varied contributions

0:24:26.626,0:24:30.366
to children's development,[br]regulation and self-control.

0:24:30.786,0:24:36.656
There -- the way they play with[br]young children causes children

0:24:36.686,0:24:40.506
to actually control their[br]impulses a little more

0:24:40.506,0:24:42.956
or know what the limits[br]of that are.

0:24:42.956,0:24:45.986
We -- you know there's this[br]discussion of fathers tend

0:24:45.986,0:24:47.986
to play more roughly[br]with their children,

0:24:48.206,0:24:51.876
and sometimes mothers get a[br]little nervous about that,

0:24:51.876,0:24:55.296
or even Head Start staff get[br]a little nervous about that.

0:24:55.296,0:24:59.236
And certainly we don't want[br]that to go too far and --

0:24:59.546,0:25:02.546
but at the same time a[br]certain amount of that is --

0:25:02.546,0:25:05.466
helps the child gain[br]self-regulation.

0:25:05.766,0:25:10.426
Language development, well men[br]tend to make children work harder

0:25:10.646,0:25:12.896
when they say something.

0:25:12.896,0:25:17.536
And the classic example is when the[br]toddler goes to the refrigerator

0:25:17.536,0:25:22.256
and goes "ju", like that, the[br]mother opens up the refrigerator,

0:25:22.606,0:25:27.006
gets a cup and pours juice[br]whereas the father goes "what?"

0:25:27.756,0:25:30.416
And then the child goes "juice".

0:25:31.066,0:25:33.546
And the father goes "oh,[br]you want some juice".

0:25:33.546,0:25:37.606
And so, like I said[br]that's in general.

0:25:37.606,0:25:39.656
Some mothers are going to be[br]more like fathers that way,

0:25:39.656,0:25:42.596
some fathers more like[br]mothers, but in general kids

0:25:42.596,0:25:46.136
in the toddler period anyway have[br]to work harder with their language.

0:25:47.246,0:25:49.646
Same is true for cognitive[br]and emotional development.

0:25:49.646,0:25:52.236
Fathers have a distinct[br]impact on that.

0:25:52.466,0:25:55.246
That active play with[br]fathers, nurturant play,

0:25:55.546,0:25:59.656
actually supports cognitive[br]and emotional development

0:25:59.656,0:26:03.956
and there's pretty strong[br]research evidence to support that.

0:26:04.556,0:26:09.546
It, the -- in fact, the[br]relationship between,

0:26:09.546,0:26:12.606
this is a different piece of[br]research, but the relationship

0:26:12.606,0:26:17.276
between a father and a child[br]is not necessarily measured

0:26:17.276,0:26:21.436
by whether the child goes[br]to the father for security.

0:26:21.806,0:26:24.896
Certainly in good[br]relationships that happens.

0:26:25.066,0:26:27.846
But, a better measure, better[br]predictor of the relationship

0:26:27.846,0:26:32.016
between a father and a child[br]is how they play together.

0:26:32.216,0:26:34.866
So, that's something that[br]we want to encourage.

0:26:35.116,0:26:37.116
And then the final bullet is well,

0:26:37.176,0:26:39.466
it's good for a lot[br]of other things too.

0:26:39.466,0:26:45.426
When fathers are involved, when[br]other men are involved in the lives

0:26:45.426,0:26:49.386
of mother's children, then[br]mothers can be better mothers.

0:26:49.506,0:26:54.136
They can mother more[br]effectively and some

0:26:54.136,0:26:56.566
of that is economic, of course.

0:26:56.566,0:27:00.486
Some of it is, as with any of[br]us when we've got the support

0:27:00.486,0:27:03.326
of another person, we[br]can do our jobs better.

0:27:03.616,0:27:07.226
Fathers themselves report[br]that when they're involved

0:27:07.226,0:27:10.456
with their children, when they're[br]engaged with their children,

0:27:10.456,0:27:12.456
they feel better about themselves.

0:27:12.456,0:27:16.826
And that's almost self-explanatory[br]and then society as a whole,

0:27:17.256,0:27:19.786
people that are engaged in[br]fathering and men who are engaged

0:27:19.786,0:27:22.486
in fathering engage in less crime.

0:27:22.936,0:27:25.246
They're more productive[br]members of society

0:27:25.966,0:27:29.356
and there's a number of outcomes.

0:27:29.716,0:27:35.786
So, that's a lot of the research[br]in a nutshell and I don't think

0:27:35.786,0:27:39.816
that most people on this call need[br]to be convinced of this in any way.

0:27:39.816,0:27:43.126
But, it's nice to have some of[br]these ideas so that we can kind

0:27:43.126,0:27:46.366
of deepen our understanding of[br]what the effect of fathers is

0:27:46.366,0:27:48.946
and what the effect of being[br]involved in children's lives

0:27:48.946,0:27:50.946
and their programs is on fathers.

0:27:51.516,0:27:56.706
[ Background Noise ]

0:27:57.206,0:27:59.286
John: Oh. Yeah go[br]ahead David, yeah.

0:27:59.706,0:28:05.736
David: So, with this particular[br]slide what we kind of wanted

0:28:06.046,0:28:11.036
to do was to have our participants[br]that have engaged in a little bit

0:28:11.036,0:28:13.036
of interactive exercise.

0:28:13.036,0:28:15.286
Sort of, if you can,[br]if you're willing,

0:28:15.836,0:28:19.506
take a look at this picture and[br]then just type into the chat sort

0:28:19.956,0:28:22.706
of what you see in this picture.

0:28:22.766,0:28:28.066
We just kind of want to get a[br]feel for sort of is there anything

0:28:28.066,0:28:33.316
that strikes you as you're looking[br]at this father and this child?

0:28:33.906,0:28:36.816
So, if you could take a[br]moment to type into it.

0:28:36.816,0:28:39.246
I think we're going to[br]use the public chat.

0:28:40.266,0:28:43.786
So, type into the chat[br]your sort of reactions

0:28:43.786,0:28:45.786
when you see this picture.

0:28:45.786,0:28:48.706
So, we'll take a few[br]minutes to have you do that.

0:28:49.516,0:29:04.716
[ Background Noise ]

0:29:05.216,0:29:08.156
David: John, is there anything else[br]you wanted to say while they're --

0:29:08.296,0:29:10.296
while we're waiting for[br]someone maybe to type a --

0:29:10.296,0:29:12.886
John: Well, the picture[br]is so compelling.

0:29:12.886,0:29:17.006
I hate to distract people.

0:29:17.006,0:29:21.416
But, I would -- if anything I've[br]said about the research was --

0:29:21.416,0:29:26.536
struck you as gee I don't really --[br]I'd like to hear more about that,

0:29:26.536,0:29:30.396
I would direct people to the[br]guide because there's a section

0:29:30.396,0:29:35.616
of the guide that kind of[br]summarizes the research on fathers,

0:29:35.616,0:29:40.356
in particular the contribution they[br]make to children's development.

0:29:40.756,0:29:48.446
David: Okay, well it doesn't look[br]like we have any brave souls.

0:29:48.446,0:29:50.446
Oh, whoa here we go.

0:29:50.446,0:29:52.446
John: Okay.

0:29:52.446,0:29:55.946
David: There is -- thank you[br]so much Lada, a dear friend

0:29:55.946,0:29:57.946
of mine, former colleague.

0:29:57.946,0:29:59.946
Well, hopefully she still[br]considers herself a colleague.

0:29:59.946,0:30:04.426
John: She's -- she felt sorry felt[br]for you and had to write something.

0:30:04.426,0:30:06.426
David: I know, right.

0:30:06.426,0:30:09.066
She sees a picture of the[br]loving father with his child.

0:30:09.336,0:30:11.336
John: Uh huh.

0:30:11.336,0:30:13.336
David: Very interesting.

0:30:13.336,0:30:16.216
Now, is there anyone else out[br]there that sees something similar

0:30:16.296,0:30:18.296
or something different[br]that would be willing

0:30:18.296,0:30:20.296
to share it with the group?

0:30:21.456,0:30:23.456
We need one brave soul.

0:30:23.456,0:30:26.146
Sam Gourlay: Actually this is[br]Sam Gourlay [assumed spelling].

0:30:26.146,0:30:28.746
Unfortunately, we're having[br]a little bit of an issue

0:30:28.746,0:30:30.746
with public chat right now.

0:30:30.746,0:30:33.736
So, there are a lot of people that[br]are airing wonderful comments,

0:30:33.736,0:30:35.736
but they're unable to get them[br]into the public chat area.

0:30:35.736,0:30:37.736
I apologize for this.

0:30:37.736,0:30:39.736
John: Okay.

0:30:39.736,0:30:41.736
David: Can you see them, Sam?

0:30:41.736,0:30:43.736
Can you see them?

0:30:43.736,0:30:45.736
Sam: Yeah.

0:30:45.736,0:30:47.736
I'm going to try to relate[br]them through the private chat.

0:30:47.736,0:30:49.736
Thanking everyone for[br]directing them to me.

0:30:49.736,0:30:51.736
I'll try to push them in.

0:30:51.736,0:30:53.736
David: Awesome, thank you.

0:30:53.736,0:30:55.736
John: Great, great.

0:30:55.736,0:30:57.736
Well maybe we can come back to[br]that and move on with the slides.

0:30:57.736,0:30:59.736
You want to do that David or?

0:30:59.736,0:31:01.736
David: Yeah, that works.

0:31:01.736,0:30:58.000
John: Yeah.

0:31:04.496,0:31:11.026
David: So, in this slide it's[br]going to be an opportunity for Ed,

0:31:11.436,0:31:13.856
John and myself to kind[br]of weigh in a little bit.

0:31:14.696,0:31:16.696
John: Yeah.

0:31:16.696,0:31:19.346
David: I particularly like this[br]slide because it is illustrative

0:31:20.046,0:31:23.126
of our expanding definition[br]of the father's role.

0:31:23.806,0:31:26.826
We've completely moved away[br]from men thinking of themselves

0:31:27.386,0:31:29.386
as solely financial providers.

0:31:29.646,0:31:32.926
Each of these roles[br]have specific meanings

0:31:32.926,0:31:37.626
to fathers given their past[br]experiences, where they are

0:31:37.626,0:31:41.696
in their current lives,[br]where they are going

0:31:41.696,0:31:43.696
and of course their maturity level.

0:31:43.696,0:31:46.536
And I'll just start with[br]one of them and give John

0:31:46.536,0:31:48.536
and Ed an opportunity to chime in.

0:31:48.846,0:31:53.496
Advocating, you know, to me,[br]advocating is what should you learn

0:31:53.496,0:31:55.496
that you're an advocate[br]for your child.

0:31:55.496,0:32:00.986
It's one of those now and[br]forever roles, so John.

0:32:01.746,0:32:06.696
John: Yeah, you know it's[br]funny, David, when you picked

0:32:06.696,0:32:10.176
on the advocate role because[br]you immediately brought me back

0:32:10.176,0:32:12.176
to when my daughter[br]was born and she was

0:32:12.966,0:32:15.076
in the neonatal intensive[br]care unit.

0:32:15.706,0:32:19.996
And my job as a father at[br]that time was to advocate

0:32:19.996,0:32:21.996
for the wellbeing of my child.

0:32:21.996,0:32:26.196
You know it was to deal[br]with this healthcare system

0:32:26.196,0:32:29.406
that I didn't understand[br]and was really angry at.

0:32:30.036,0:32:34.056
And so, you know there's that,[br]there was the nurturer part

0:32:34.056,0:32:36.606
of that, the protector part[br]of that, but there was also,

0:32:36.606,0:32:38.866
like I had to advocate[br]for my child.

0:32:38.866,0:32:43.046
I had to know something, and[br]so I appreciate you starting

0:32:43.046,0:32:45.046
with that one.

0:32:45.046,0:32:47.476
The one that I pick up on[br]is this friend-playmate

0:32:47.476,0:32:50.946
because that's a very complex one.

0:32:51.666,0:32:56.756
You know we tell fathers "well,

0:32:56.756,0:32:59.866
if you want to be the[br]disciplinarian you can't be your

0:32:59.906,0:33:01.906
child's friend.

0:33:01.906,0:33:03.906
You got to be the father.

0:33:03.906,0:33:06.136
You got to be the discipline, the[br]person that provides discipline."

0:33:06.136,0:33:11.166
At the same time, you know, there's[br]a slash playmate and we know

0:33:11.166,0:33:14.426
that in the relationships[br]between fathers

0:33:14.546,0:33:17.866
and their children is often[br]a very playful relationship

0:33:18.166,0:33:21.126
in that the child, as early[br]childhood people we know,

0:33:21.566,0:33:24.726
the child learns through[br]the process of play.

0:33:25.126,0:33:29.576
So, I think that that one is,[br]that one's got a lot of complexity

0:33:29.576,0:33:36.106
to it, but it's one that we know[br]kind of fathers connect with.

0:33:36.516,0:33:39.476
So, that's my two[br]cents on that one.

0:33:39.566,0:33:41.566
David: Awesome, Ed.

0:33:41.566,0:33:43.566
Edwin: Yeah I'm here.

0:33:43.566,0:33:45.566
I would -- we had just[br]talked about this earlier,

0:33:45.566,0:33:47.606
and I was just talking to[br]one of the fathers here that,

0:33:47.606,0:33:50.236
or actually a grandfather,[br]about some of these things.

0:33:50.236,0:33:52.626
And we -- you know, a lot of[br]it has to deal with for us,

0:33:52.776,0:33:55.546
from a native side,[br]is our core values.

0:33:55.996,0:33:59.206
You know, again, you know,[br]building strength on the --

0:33:59.636,0:34:04.346
where we incorporate culture,[br]ceremony, traditions and healing

0:34:04.346,0:34:07.556
and of course humor is a big[br]part of you know native men

0:34:07.556,0:34:09.556
and of course all men in general.

0:34:09.686,0:34:11.846
And that -- we are[br]hoping that was going --

0:34:12.025,0:34:15.085
some of the teaching that we do[br]through spiritual guidance is

0:34:15.085,0:34:20.386
that it help us, you know, increase[br]and strengthen family preservation.

0:34:20.386,0:34:22.906
And that's what we're all kind[br]of looking for is offering

0:34:22.906,0:34:25.966
that family preservation and[br]for our children to continue

0:34:25.966,0:34:28.916
to offer those teachings as[br]they become parents later on,

0:34:29.396,0:34:31.406
role modeling some of[br]those things especially.

0:34:31.666,0:34:35.315
Again, you know a lot of[br]it is creating a safe place

0:34:35.315,0:34:39.505
for men you know to come and[br]talk about these types of things.

0:34:39.505,0:34:42.315
And a lot of it sometimes[br]doesn't always take place

0:34:42.315,0:34:44.636
in a [Inaudible] setting, but[br]a lot of it also takes part

0:34:44.636,0:34:47.426
at our fatherhood[br]program here at Laguna.

0:34:47.426,0:34:51.366
Again, it's again all about[br]strengthening, you know,

0:34:51.426,0:34:53.426
family relationships,[br]family involvement

0:34:53.426,0:34:55.596
and just being a responsible father

0:34:56.025,0:34:58.146
that again goes back[br]to the preservation.

0:34:59.016,0:35:01.016
David: Okay.

0:35:01.016,0:35:03.016
Edwin: You know those are just some[br]of the things that we had talked

0:35:03.016,0:35:05.016
about earlier, so -- John: Yeah.

0:35:05.016,0:35:09.676
The other day, Ed, you also said[br]something about how in Laguna

0:35:09.736,0:35:14.636
that the -- that men transmit[br]certain things culturally

0:35:14.636,0:35:16.996
to the kids as the[br]educator in a sense.

0:35:17.756,0:35:21.856
Edwin: Right, right and that's -- a[br]lot of the cultural teachings come

0:35:21.856,0:35:23.856
in from the [inaudible] side.

0:35:23.856,0:35:27.706
It also includes planting because[br]the planting doesn't only include

0:35:27.706,0:35:30.306
just planting of a seed in[br]the ground, but it also --

0:35:30.536,0:35:32.536
there's a cultural teaching behind

0:35:32.536,0:35:35.516
that where you're planting[br]other knowledge into a child

0:35:35.516,0:35:37.516
and you know planting[br]those important roles

0:35:37.536,0:35:39.906
that they will be facing[br]as they become adults.

0:35:39.906,0:35:41.906
So, those are some of the things[br]that growing and nurturing

0:35:41.906,0:35:43.906
of those particular things.

0:35:43.906,0:35:45.906
John: Wow, right.

0:35:45.906,0:35:48.336
David: You know, and John I[br]was thinking a little bit too

0:35:48.336,0:35:51.016
about what you said you[br]know with your daughter.

0:35:51.166,0:35:55.026
And I think one of the things[br]that we don't always acknowledge

0:35:55.026,0:35:57.196
or allow ourselves[br]to sort of appreciate

0:35:57.406,0:36:02.176
in men is they are afraid,[br]that they're scared.

0:36:02.706,0:36:05.466
They're scared of embracing[br]the fatherhood role.

0:36:05.666,0:36:07.666
John: Yeah.

0:36:07.666,0:36:10.626
David: Embracing sort of the[br]expanding definition of their role,

0:36:11.216,0:36:13.416
and also afraid of[br]negotiating systems.

0:36:13.416,0:36:16.866
I can't even imagine what it must[br]be, feel like to have a daughter

0:36:16.866,0:36:18.986
in a neonatal intensive[br]care unit and have

0:36:18.986,0:36:21.356
to negotiate you know[br]all these professionals.

0:36:21.356,0:36:26.786
And we, you know, as humans we[br]tend to rely on professionals

0:36:26.786,0:36:30.096
to make important decisions[br]that impact our lives for us

0:36:30.096,0:36:32.266
because we trust that they[br]have a particular expertise.

0:36:32.936,0:36:35.526
So, I think that as we continue[br]to expand our understanding

0:36:35.526,0:36:39.986
of how we need to be thinking about[br]working with fathers it's okay,

0:36:39.986,0:36:43.116
it's important for us to realize[br]rather that they do become afraid.

0:36:43.116,0:36:46.696
They are challenged by[br]fulfilling all the multiple roles

0:36:46.726,0:36:50.056
that we're asking them to fulfill[br]and that these fears are very real

0:36:50.056,0:36:52.226
for them, and they have to[br]acknowledged and supported.

0:36:52.276,0:36:54.276
John: Yeah that's great David.

0:36:54.276,0:36:57.086
I mean you're right on.

0:36:57.086,0:37:01.126
And I think that of course when[br]you're talking about fear in men

0:37:02.096,0:37:05.776
and society you know we[br]don't like to show it.

0:37:05.776,0:37:07.776
David: Right.

0:37:07.776,0:37:10.166
John: Right, we don't[br]necessarily like to show our fears,

0:37:10.166,0:37:12.926
but probably if you[br]ask most men who happen

0:37:12.926,0:37:16.676
to be fathers too what their[br]greatest fear is they're not going

0:37:16.676,0:37:18.676
to say their own safety.

0:37:18.676,0:37:20.676
They're going to say[br]fear for their child.

0:37:20.696,0:37:22.696
David: Right.

0:37:22.696,0:37:24.696
John: Which is probably[br]very in common with women.

0:37:24.976,0:37:30.776
But, its -- and, but do men[br]actually reveal their fears

0:37:30.776,0:37:32.776
in the same way?

0:37:32.776,0:37:34.776
Do they talk about them?

0:37:34.776,0:37:39.136
And I think that's real[br][Inaudible] when you --

0:37:39.136,0:37:45.026
when a father actually will[br]say, you know, that I'm afraid

0:37:45.026,0:37:48.446
that my child isn't going[br]to succeed in school,

0:37:48.446,0:37:51.826
or my child isn't going[br]to be accepted by peers,

0:37:51.826,0:37:56.686
or whatever the issue is, then[br]you're dealing with a passion

0:37:56.686,0:37:58.686
that makes him a father.

0:37:58.686,0:38:01.256
Then you're nurturing the[br]nurturer when you can listen

0:38:01.256,0:38:03.256
to that and support that man.

0:38:03.306,0:38:06.736
But, if you're at the place[br]where a father is sharing some

0:38:06.736,0:38:13.096
of those fears with you in a way[br]that's comfortable then I think

0:38:13.096,0:38:15.706
you've made real progress[br]in your relationship

0:38:15.706,0:38:17.706
with that father, for sure.

0:38:17.706,0:38:19.706
David: That is a really[br]important point.

0:38:19.706,0:38:21.816
Alright, so I think[br]we had a few comments.

0:38:21.816,0:38:24.466
We're going to move back[br]really quickly -- John: Okay.

0:38:24.466,0:38:26.466
David: To the previous slide.

0:38:26.466,0:38:29.106
And I just want to share[br]what's interesting --

0:38:29.106,0:38:32.666
Lada sort of kicked this off[br]and she's obviously female.

0:38:33.236,0:38:38.126
But, then we had three men[br]comment and the comments were:

0:38:38.546,0:38:42.136
wanting to stay connected; a[br]father wanting to stay connected

0:38:42.136,0:38:46.726
to his child; the importance of the[br]skin to skin contact between father

0:38:46.726,0:38:50.826
and child; and a man[br]showing gentle love and care.

0:38:51.436,0:38:53.436
John: Yeah.

0:38:53.436,0:38:55.436
David: All very positive,[br]which is great.

0:38:55.436,0:38:57.436
John: Yeah.

0:38:57.436,0:38:59.436
David: So, I think we've[br]done a good job of sort

0:38:59.436,0:39:01.436
of getting people[br]excited and getting them

0:39:01.436,0:39:03.436
to celebrate what we're doing

0:39:03.436,0:39:05.436
and having them feel really[br]positively about fatherhood.

0:39:05.436,0:39:09.396
When Kiersten and I recently showed[br]this slide and sort of used it

0:39:10.026,0:39:12.026
as part of our presentation

0:39:12.026,0:39:16.856
in the Leadership Institute there[br]was some different perceptions

0:39:16.976,0:39:19.126
that came from a predominately[br]female audience,

0:39:19.126,0:39:21.126
which was really interesting.

0:39:21.126,0:39:26.316
For the most part participants[br]were supportive and they were able

0:39:26.316,0:39:28.326
to actually look at the[br]strength in the picture.

0:39:28.946,0:39:34.036
But, then some of the participants[br]seemed like the father looked

0:39:34.136,0:39:36.396
like he was uncomfortable.

0:39:36.676,0:39:38.676
He didn't really know[br]what he was doing.

0:39:38.866,0:39:42.476
The baby's face looks like[br]it's a little crunched

0:39:42.476,0:39:44.476
up in between his shoulder.

0:39:44.476,0:39:46.476
The baby looked uncomfortable.

0:39:46.476,0:39:48.476
I mean they took it to some[br]really interesting places

0:39:48.476,0:39:50.686
and it was almost as if they[br]wanted to take the baby out of

0:39:50.686,0:39:55.086
that father's hands, which[br]was really interesting to us.

0:39:55.686,0:39:59.886
And a question for -- from[br]us to the group would be,

0:40:00.386,0:40:03.446
how would you help this[br]father build upon what we see

0:40:03.446,0:40:05.736
in the photo that is a strength?

0:40:05.736,0:40:08.166
And if there are some things that[br]now that you're looking at it

0:40:08.206,0:40:11.626
from a different lens that you[br]would want to sort of change

0:40:11.626,0:40:13.966
or provide some support[br]and guidance around.

0:40:14.496,0:40:17.106
What might be the first thing[br]that you would say to this guy?

0:40:17.956,0:40:19.956
That's rhetorical.

0:40:19.956,0:40:21.956
I'm not expecting you to answer.

0:40:21.956,0:40:23.956
But, John you want to weigh in?

0:40:23.956,0:40:27.056
John: Yeah, I think -- I[br]mean any picture of a man

0:40:27.056,0:40:32.006
or a woman holding a child[br]evokes a pretty strong kind

0:40:32.006,0:40:34.446
of just below the[br]surface responses.

0:40:34.916,0:40:40.676
And I mean you see a baby and[br]you want to hold the baby.

0:40:40.906,0:40:44.806
I see babies in supermarkets, and[br]I try to steal them all the time.

0:40:44.896,0:40:47.316
I mean it's like it's[br]-- there is a response.

0:40:47.316,0:40:50.596
There's a very -- and I[br]guess if you had a response

0:40:50.596,0:40:55.486
and you didn't even put it down on[br]paper, or the computer I guess now,

0:40:55.876,0:40:59.486
is oh -- I would try to understand

0:40:59.486,0:41:02.206
that response before[br]doing anything, you know,

0:41:02.206,0:41:04.206
or as you're doing something.

0:41:04.206,0:41:06.656
But, certainly I like,[br]David, what you're saying,

0:41:06.656,0:41:12.476
so yea there's plenty that you can[br]see in this picture to work from.

0:41:13.006,0:41:16.806
And yeah, I -- actually[br]I immediately go

0:41:16.806,0:41:19.156
to what you're asking.

0:41:19.156,0:41:22.146
It's like well, how would you[br]start making a relationship

0:41:22.146,0:41:24.326
with his father based on[br]what you see right here?

0:41:24.716,0:41:26.716
>> Uh huh.

0:41:26.716,0:41:28.716
>> Yeah. David: And, you know,

0:41:28.716,0:41:30.826
I mean it's like just really[br]simple basic questions that's going

0:41:30.826,0:41:34.116
to give you some insight[br]into where this father is at.

0:41:34.536,0:41:36.536
What's important to him?

0:41:36.536,0:41:38.536
How he might be thinking[br]in that moment?

0:41:38.536,0:41:40.536
You know, how does[br]this feel for you?

0:41:40.536,0:41:44.096
What are you thinking when you hold[br]your child so close in this way?

0:41:44.466,0:41:46.696
Is there a particular reason[br]why you hold him that way

0:41:46.696,0:41:48.696
because it could be cultural?

0:41:48.696,0:41:51.846
But, those are points,[br]questions that will then begin

0:41:51.916,0:41:55.416
to generate some really significant[br]conversations with that father.

0:41:56.236,0:41:58.236
John: Yeah, yeah, great.

0:41:58.236,0:42:01.126
David: So, we're going[br]to move and John

0:42:01.196,0:42:03.196
as you -- John: Oh, look at this.

0:42:03.196,0:42:05.196
Look at this.

0:42:05.196,0:42:07.196
That's good.

0:42:07.196,0:42:09.196
I've seen this before.

0:42:09.196,0:42:11.196
This is the Parent, Family, and[br]Community Engagement Framework,

0:42:11.196,0:42:13.196
and I assume that many of you

0:42:13.196,0:42:16.086
on the webinar have seen[br]this very colorful graphic.

0:42:16.626,0:42:21.576
I think it's -- I actually[br]really like this Framework.

0:42:21.576,0:42:25.736
I think it puts together[br]exactly what it says that parent

0:42:25.736,0:42:28.126
and family engagement,[br]and you could --

0:42:28.256,0:42:30.666
instead of parent and[br]family, you could put father

0:42:30.666,0:42:32.666
in there, not without family.

0:42:32.966,0:42:36.056
Not without the parent,[br]but you could put father

0:42:36.546,0:42:39.656
and it would all still apply.

0:42:39.656,0:42:44.136
So, when father engagements[br]are systematic and integrated

0:42:44.136,0:42:46.816
across program foundations[br]and impact areas,

0:42:46.816,0:42:49.196
family outcomes are achieved.

0:42:49.426,0:42:52.796
So, and then hence you're[br]working on child outcomes.

0:42:53.216,0:42:55.216
But, this progression[br]is interesting.

0:42:55.216,0:42:57.216
And I almost like[br]to think of this as,

0:42:57.216,0:43:00.696
so the program foundations[br]they're like the nervous system.

0:43:00.696,0:43:02.696
They're the brain.

0:43:02.696,0:43:07.206
They're the thing that sends[br]messages to the whole body, right?

0:43:07.206,0:43:10.616
So, the program leadership is[br]like yes, we believe in it.

0:43:10.766,0:43:15.806
My brain believes in[br]father engagement.

0:43:15.926,0:43:19.536
I actually reflect on my own[br]relationship with my father,

0:43:19.536,0:43:22.246
and I want to make it a[br]priority for this program

0:43:22.246,0:43:24.846
and these are the ways I'm[br]going to support everybody.

0:43:25.266,0:43:27.996
And that -- part of the[br]point here is that everybody

0:43:28.306,0:43:31.946
in the system is engaging[br]with fathers,

0:43:31.946,0:43:34.916
the same for continuous improvement[br]and professional development.

0:43:34.916,0:43:36.916
They're kind of like --[br]these are the things,

0:43:36.916,0:43:38.916
these are the foundations.

0:43:38.916,0:43:40.916
These are what makes[br]a whole system work.

0:43:40.916,0:43:43.616
Kind of see the program[br]environment that --

0:43:43.616,0:43:46.406
the impact areas as[br]kind of the muscles

0:43:46.406,0:43:48.996
and the organs of[br]the organism, right?

0:43:48.996,0:43:51.536
You know, these are things[br]that get things done.

0:43:51.536,0:43:58.116
The partnerships with[br]families, with fathers are

0:43:58.116,0:44:00.116
where we get things done.

0:44:00.116,0:44:03.696
The teaching and learning, the[br]partnerships with other agencies

0:44:03.696,0:44:06.506
and certainly creating[br]a welcoming environment

0:44:06.506,0:44:10.466
for fathers is a large[br]piece of what we need

0:44:10.466,0:44:12.536
to do to send that message.

0:44:12.946,0:44:18.176
But, if you notice along[br]the top, the arrow, positive

0:44:18.176,0:44:20.186
and goal oriented relationships.

0:44:20.186,0:44:22.786
Well, I see that as the[br]blood in the system.

0:44:22.786,0:44:24.786
That's the circulatory system.

0:44:24.786,0:44:27.406
That's what keeps everything[br]refreshed and going.

0:44:28.186,0:44:30.496
Maybe the metaphor[br]doesn't work that well.

0:44:30.496,0:44:32.496
I don't know.

0:44:32.496,0:44:35.176
But, the -- I don't want to[br]neglect that arrow at the top

0:44:35.266,0:44:39.306
because for all these pieces[br]to work together, for this body

0:44:39.646,0:44:43.896
to work together, we've got to[br]reflect on our relationships

0:44:43.896,0:44:47.126
with men who have their[br]children in our program.

0:44:48.526,0:44:52.016
That we have to keep[br]that blood flowing

0:44:52.316,0:44:57.356
by constantly giving it[br]oxygen, by refreshing it,

0:44:57.356,0:44:59.916
and that is through[br]our relationships

0:44:59.916,0:45:02.546
with these fathers whether[br]it's at the drop off,

0:45:03.006,0:45:07.176
whether it's in -- at a picnic.

0:45:07.176,0:45:12.706
Whether it's sending a[br]document home or calling home.

0:45:13.006,0:45:15.826
Whether -- you know[br]in so many ways --

0:45:15.826,0:45:17.826
Ed did you want to say something?

0:45:17.826,0:45:19.826
Was that -- I just[br]heard somebody's voice.

0:45:20.126,0:45:24.786
Okay, so-- Edwin: No John[br]I was muted there, sorry.

0:45:25.366,0:45:27.366
John: Okay.

0:45:27.366,0:45:30.496
So, in any case, I think in[br]every one of these elements

0:45:30.496,0:45:34.816
and the outcomes you can[br]see specific kind of things

0:45:34.816,0:45:41.506
that we can do with fathers, family[br]wellbeing as an outcome area.

0:45:41.836,0:45:47.026
Well, one of the things that[br]I think I've seen in programs

0:45:47.026,0:45:51.176
that do very well with fathers[br]is that they acknowledge

0:45:51.176,0:45:56.346
that these men also need to[br]feel good as men in our society

0:45:56.346,0:45:58.346
if they're going to do[br]a good job as fathers.

0:45:58.906,0:46:03.146
So, and we talked about this the[br]other day when we were planning

0:46:03.146,0:46:05.146
that this is an important[br]piece too.

0:46:05.146,0:46:10.306
It doesn't just mean that we[br]scrutinize fathers and expect them

0:46:10.306,0:46:12.306
to be nurturant and play[br]with their children.

0:46:12.566,0:46:15.276
But, we also want[br]them to be supported

0:46:15.336,0:46:19.946
in who they are themselves and[br]how they feel about themselves

0:46:20.736,0:46:24.436
as competent human[br]beings in this society.

0:46:24.666,0:46:27.426
So -- Edwin: So -- John:[br]Yeah, go ahead Ed, yeah.

0:46:27.766,0:46:30.856
Edwin: Yeah, again just talking[br]about the program leadership,

0:46:30.856,0:46:32.856
the continuous program improve --

0:46:32.856,0:46:35.286
all the things that[br]you have up there.

0:46:35.286,0:46:38.446
I think that's where we're at right[br]now with supporting the fathers

0:46:38.446,0:46:41.696
in those things because, you[br]know, again, the more you're --

0:46:41.836,0:46:44.736
again it goes back into our core[br]values of what we just talked

0:46:44.736,0:46:47.526
about the strengths, to build[br]upon those strengths too

0:46:47.856,0:46:49.856
for family preservation.

0:46:50.236,0:46:52.926
Right now within our[br]process, again,

0:46:53.196,0:46:55.196
since we've had this[br]fatherhood initiative,

0:46:55.336,0:46:57.906
but we've had some challenges,[br]but still yet we're --

0:46:57.946,0:47:01.316
I think the most important[br]thing is to try to make sure

0:47:01.316,0:47:06.936
that we encourage fathers to[br]come in and be a part of their --

0:47:06.936,0:47:11.206
the whole cycle for the educational[br]piece, school readiness.

0:47:11.206,0:47:13.206
John: Uh huh.

0:47:13.206,0:47:15.206
Edwin: You know, again,[br]we do that through --

0:47:15.206,0:47:17.686
we have a lot of dads now[br]that are coming to program,

0:47:18.136,0:47:20.496
I don't know what they have to[br]do with the fatherhood program,

0:47:20.496,0:47:23.926
but I think it's just making[br]more making the men feel more

0:47:23.926,0:47:27.496
comfortable and setting -- by[br]setting goals that they're able

0:47:27.496,0:47:31.146
to you know come up with the[br]family priority goal worksheet

0:47:31.186,0:47:33.186
screening tools.

0:47:33.186,0:47:35.966
And again, very involved[br]in ISSP or IEPs, you know?

0:47:36.186,0:47:38.646
Involving parents in those[br]things make them comfortable

0:47:38.646,0:47:41.416
and help them engage, I guess,

0:47:41.416,0:47:43.636
more so in their child's[br]readiness for school.

0:47:43.906,0:47:45.906
So, I just wanted[br]to interject that.

0:47:45.916,0:47:48.336
John: Yeah, that's great Ed.

0:47:48.336,0:47:53.766
When I was out in Laguna this[br]last year we were looking

0:47:53.766,0:47:56.036
at the transition[br]to school and you --

0:47:56.036,0:48:00.286
there was an event in which[br]the kindergarten teachers came

0:48:00.286,0:48:03.026
to the program and each was[br]in a different classroom

0:48:03.026,0:48:05.176
because there's a number[br]of elementary schools.

0:48:06.326,0:48:10.316
And what was -- one of the[br]things that was really striking

0:48:10.566,0:48:15.666
about that was I think there were[br]just as many men there as women.

0:48:16.066,0:48:18.976
I could be wrong.

0:48:19.096,0:48:21.096
You know, I could be[br]primed to look for that,

0:48:21.236,0:48:25.966
but I felt that there were a lot[br]of men engaged, just as engaged,

0:48:26.296,0:48:30.136
having just as many conversations[br]with these kindergarten teachers.

0:48:30.666,0:48:34.756
And it was great to[br]see, but it was --

0:48:34.946,0:48:38.836
I mean you didn't[br]have to look for it.

0:48:39.156,0:48:41.156
It was there.

0:48:41.156,0:48:43.156
It seemed very equitable.

0:48:43.156,0:48:45.156
David: Okay.

0:48:45.156,0:48:47.156
So, John we need to move on to the[br]-- John: Okay, sorry, yeah, yeah.

0:48:47.156,0:48:49.156
David: That's okay.

0:48:49.156,0:48:51.316
John: So, a polling question.

0:48:51.646,0:48:53.646
David: Uh huh.

0:48:53.646,0:48:55.646
John: Okay.

0:48:55.646,0:48:57.646
I need to see it.

0:48:57.646,0:48:59.646
Let's see.

0:48:59.646,0:49:01.646
David Jones: And yeah,[br]Natalie's going to load it.

0:49:01.646,0:49:02.000
John: Okay.

0:49:04.146,0:49:07.076
[ Background Noise ]

0:49:07.576,0:49:09.576
John: Right.

0:49:11.076,0:49:13.076
When thinking about[br]-- David: Hey John --

0:49:13.076,0:49:15.076
John: Do you want me to read it?

0:49:15.076,0:49:17.076
David: Yes, yes.

0:49:17.076,0:49:19.076
John: Yeah, yeah.

0:49:19.076,0:49:21.076
When thinking about father[br]engagement that is systemic,

0:49:21.076,0:49:25.736
integrated and comprehensive I[br]would say our program is beginning,

0:49:25.736,0:49:30.316
progressing, thriving[br]and innovating, or stuck.

0:49:31.386,0:49:33.886
And go ahead and answer[br]the question.

0:49:34.516,0:50:35.576
[ Background Noise ]

0:50:36.076,0:50:41.796
David: So, can we see the results?

0:50:41.796,0:50:45.906
John: Oh, there they[br]are just as you asked.

0:50:45.936,0:50:47.936
Isn't that interesting?

0:50:47.936,0:50:49.936
David: Um hmm hmm.

0:50:49.936,0:50:54.296
John: What's that mean[br]David, that umm hmm hmm?

0:50:54.366,0:50:57.476
But, 29 percent progressing,[br]that's great.

0:50:57.506,0:50:59.506
David: That is really great.

0:50:59.506,0:51:01.506
John: Yeah, yeah.

0:51:01.506,0:51:04.156
David: And we have five percent[br]that are thriving and innovating.

0:51:04.466,0:51:06.466
John: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:51:06.696,0:51:11.766
David: What's going to be really[br]important post this webinar is

0:51:11.766,0:51:13.906
that any of you out there who feel

0:51:13.906,0:51:19.556
that you are stuck please do[br]not hesitate to reach out to us.

0:51:20.376,0:51:22.616
If there's any way that we're going[br]to be able to provide some support

0:51:22.616,0:51:24.616
and guidance for you that is one

0:51:24.616,0:51:26.616
of the main reasons why[br]we're doing this webinar.

0:51:26.616,0:51:29.586
For those of you that[br]are beginning, kudos.

0:51:30.166,0:51:34.196
We hope that you're moving forward[br]in a really nice way and, you know,

0:51:34.196,0:51:38.076
you move onto a place[br]where you're progressing

0:51:38.076,0:51:40.076
and you're thriving and innovating.

0:51:40.076,0:51:43.116
But again, for all of you at[br]any stage of your evolution,

0:51:43.116,0:51:46.996
if there's some way in which we can[br]be supportive once you've looked

0:51:46.996,0:51:49.666
in at the resources that[br]we're launching this week

0:51:50.326,0:51:54.666
and you have questions about[br]them please reach out to us.

0:51:55.516,0:51:57.806
That's why we're here.

0:51:57.806,0:51:59.806
Natalie, thank you.

0:51:59.806,0:52:04.726
John. John: Yeah, I[br]actually mentioned some

0:52:04.726,0:52:11.266
of these things earlier that the[br]foundations are essential here,

0:52:11.376,0:52:14.936
and I think the question that[br]we just looked at is basically

0:52:14.936,0:52:16.936
about continuous improvement.

0:52:16.936,0:52:21.966
So, where are you in[br]relation to engaging fathers?

0:52:22.366,0:52:28.556
I mentioned that there's a lot[br]that can be done in the leadership

0:52:28.766,0:52:31.436
of a program to support.

0:52:31.436,0:52:33.976
I mean, if we go back to the[br]framework, we're thinking

0:52:33.976,0:52:36.386
of a systemic and integrated thing.

0:52:36.386,0:52:41.746
Well, that whole idea of a[br]dynamic system, an organization

0:52:41.746,0:52:47.386
as a system, the leadership within[br]the system needs to be fully behind

0:52:47.386,0:52:50.076
that and engage with that.

0:52:50.126,0:52:54.586
So, that's an important[br]component of it.

0:52:54.846,0:52:58.806
My experience with this[br]is that often the programs

0:52:58.806,0:53:03.346
that are thriving in relation[br]to this -- well first of all,

0:53:03.516,0:53:05.516
they almost always say --

0:53:05.516,0:53:08.746
the leadership almost always[br]says we still have a ways to go.

0:53:09.176,0:53:14.416
But then, I also find that there[br]really is a personal commitment

0:53:14.416,0:53:20.836
on the part of the director or the[br]manager toward work with fathers.

0:53:21.146,0:53:26.086
And I'm not saying everybody[br]has to make that their sole

0:53:26.086,0:53:29.696
and primary mission,[br]but I think that when --

0:53:29.696,0:53:33.486
what I found is that there's[br]often for the programs

0:53:33.486,0:53:36.626
that are thriving a real passion[br]in the leadership for this.

0:53:36.626,0:53:40.766
The continuous improvement,[br]going back to that, is --

0:53:41.216,0:53:45.306
this is part of this whole[br]idea of having a framework

0:53:45.306,0:53:49.156
and having a webinar like[br]this and having the guide is

0:53:49.156,0:53:51.526
that we can be intentional[br]about what we do.

0:53:51.846,0:53:56.216
We may feel that we're doing[br]very good work with fathers,

0:53:56.456,0:54:00.386
but when you're doing it in a[br]systemic way and an integrated

0:54:00.386,0:54:03.446
and comprehensive way that means[br]you're doing it intentionally

0:54:03.446,0:54:05.446
as well.

0:54:05.446,0:54:09.106
And so, that's when -- so yeah,[br]where were we five years ago?

0:54:09.106,0:54:11.106
Where are we now?

0:54:11.106,0:54:13.106
And where are we going?

0:54:13.106,0:54:15.106
What steps do we need[br]to take to get there?

0:54:15.106,0:54:17.106
David: Awesome.

0:54:17.106,0:54:19.106
John: Yeah.

0:54:19.106,0:54:21.106
David: So, this next[br]slide sort of builds upon

0:54:21.106,0:54:23.106
and expands upon the last[br]part of that previous slide,

0:54:23.106,0:54:25.106
the sort of professional[br]development piece.

0:54:25.106,0:54:27.806
Not to negate, sort of, the men[br]in the audience or in the rooms,

0:54:28.096,0:54:31.986
but I want to speak sort of[br]directly to the women in the room.

0:54:32.616,0:54:35.516
And then, before I continue,[br]remember I was the one

0:54:36.006,0:54:39.596
who said how instrumental[br]women have been in contributing

0:54:39.596,0:54:42.336
to the success of the[br]fatherhood movement.

0:54:42.876,0:54:44.876
So, now you know I'm getting[br]ready to be a little --

0:54:44.876,0:54:46.876
John: Yeah, but --

0:54:46.876,0:54:50.106
David: Professional[br]development is so tricky.

0:54:50.106,0:54:52.106
I can't tell you.

0:54:52.106,0:54:54.106
I've spent so much time, energy[br]and effort as a director,

0:54:54.846,0:54:59.126
supporting directors,[br]supporting programs around getting

0:54:59.126,0:55:01.686
to this piece of, if you're[br]really going to do this work

0:55:01.686,0:55:04.036
in a way that's systemic,[br]integrated and comprehensive,

0:55:04.356,0:55:08.166
it begins with the leadership[br]understanding that there has

0:55:08.236,0:55:10.236
to be this continuous[br]improvement process.

0:55:10.476,0:55:13.086
But it is grounded and it begins[br]with professional development.

0:55:14.146,0:55:17.686
So, this can be a really hard[br]conversation to have in programs

0:55:17.686,0:55:22.226
because I've never met a successful[br]fatherhood program that had a one

0:55:22.476,0:55:25.606
and done staff development[br]that prepared the staff

0:55:25.606,0:55:27.606
to adequately work with fathers.

0:55:27.606,0:55:29.606
John: Yeah.

0:55:29.606,0:55:32.406
David: In my experience when[br]staff have been trained and are

0:55:32.406,0:55:35.616
on board it is synonymous[br]with being involved

0:55:35.616,0:55:37.616
in the process of[br]supporting fathers.

0:55:38.016,0:55:40.706
Very basic, show up[br]and we can dance.

0:55:41.296,0:55:46.176
But, when they are on board[br]or willing to grow to do

0:55:46.176,0:55:48.216
that self-assessment[br]and wrestle with some

0:55:48.216,0:55:51.646
of their own more deep seeded[br]issues and/or challenges,

0:55:52.126,0:55:55.556
they are now engaged in the[br]process of engaging fathers.

0:55:56.546,0:55:58.686
You know, just like we have[br]to help men get to a place

0:55:58.686,0:56:01.786
where they were healthy enough[br]to confront their challenges,

0:56:01.956,0:56:05.276
we have to also help female[br]staff be healthy enough to know

0:56:05.276,0:56:07.276
when they require[br]additional supports.

0:56:07.926,0:56:13.176
And this slide sort of speaks to[br]my belief based upon my experience,

0:56:13.176,0:56:17.646
there's no research connected to[br]this, that when staff have sort

0:56:17.646,0:56:20.666
of said, "okay we're on board with[br]working with expanding services

0:56:20.666,0:56:23.316
for fathers and supporting[br]and engaging fathers,"

0:56:23.666,0:56:25.836
that they will engage in[br]conversations with them

0:56:25.836,0:56:28.166
that takes them a little bit[br]outside of their comfort zone.

0:56:28.556,0:56:31.146
Those conversations are going[br]to be extremely child-focused.

0:56:31.606,0:56:33.606
They'll be very specific.

0:56:33.606,0:56:36.226
They're going to be so self-aware[br]of how they're communicating

0:56:36.676,0:56:38.676
and what they're communicating.

0:56:38.676,0:56:41.466
So they're clinging to those[br]boundaries at an optimal distance.

0:56:42.856,0:56:47.096
Those anchors are really, really[br]important, but once they move

0:56:47.096,0:56:50.296
to a place where they're a little[br]bit more engaged and again,

0:56:50.296,0:56:52.406
they're doing the self-assessment,[br]they're wrestling with some

0:56:52.406,0:56:55.696
of their own deep seeded issues[br]and supervision or in therapy

0:56:55.696,0:56:57.696
if necessary, whatever[br]the case may be,

0:56:57.856,0:57:02.436
then they're a lot more comfortable[br]in terms of how they sort

0:57:02.606,0:57:05.286
of approach these[br]conversations with fathers.

0:57:05.806,0:57:08.286
John. John: Okay.

0:57:08.286,0:57:10.286
David: Was that you who put the X?

0:57:10.286,0:57:12.286
John: You bet.

0:57:12.286,0:57:14.286
David: Oh, okay.

0:57:14.286,0:57:16.286
John: But, I'll wait till[br]the elephant slide comes up.

0:57:16.286,0:57:18.286
David: Okay.

0:57:18.286,0:57:21.766
John: So, let's -- do[br]you want to move to?

0:57:21.766,0:57:23.766
-- yeah David: Yeah.

0:57:23.766,0:57:25.766
John: So we've got[br]a polling question.

0:57:25.766,0:57:27.766
David: We have another polling[br]question for you, because we want

0:57:27.766,0:57:29.766
to try to keep this interactive.

0:57:29.766,0:57:31.766
And I know that once we do[br]something that's a little bit

0:57:31.766,0:57:33.766
provocative we might[br]get more responses.

0:57:33.766,0:57:35.766
So, Natalie, please[br]launch the first question.

0:57:35.766,0:57:37.766
I'll go ahead and read it[br]as she -- oh there it is.

0:57:37.766,0:57:42.346
How comfortable are you in[br]building partnerships with fathers?

0:57:43.166,0:57:45.166
I am very comfortable.

0:57:45.306,0:57:47.306
I am mostly comfortable.

0:57:48.346,0:57:50.346
I am somewhat comfortable.

0:57:50.976,0:57:52.976
I am uncomfortable.

0:57:52.976,0:57:54.976
I am very uncomfortable.

0:57:54.976,0:57:57.656
So, this is sort of a way that[br]you can sort of privately weigh in

0:57:57.656,0:58:02.556
and chime in now on where you're[br]at with respect to this question.

0:58:02.556,0:58:04.000
We'll give you a couple[br]seconds for you to do that.

0:58:05.056,0:58:15.656
[ Background Noise ]

0:58:16.156,0:58:17.000
John: Somebody's whispering.

0:58:18.656,0:58:21.836
[ Background Noise ]

0:58:22.336,0:58:24.336
David: We have a lot of[br]people, so we're going

0:58:24.336,0:58:26.336
to give you guys a[br]little bit more time.

0:58:26.416,0:58:28.556
John: Ah, there it is.

0:58:28.556,0:58:30.746
David: Thank you so[br]much for calling in.

0:58:30.886,0:58:32.886
We have results?

0:58:32.886,0:58:34.886
John: Yeah.

0:58:34.886,0:58:36.886
David: So, it's taking my system a[br]little bit longer for them to show.

0:58:36.886,0:58:38.886
John, can you speak to them?

0:58:38.886,0:58:40.886
John: Yeah, yeah.

0:58:40.886,0:58:42.886
23 percent of the people

0:58:42.886,0:58:44.886
on the call are saying[br]they're very comfortable,

0:58:44.886,0:58:47.726
20 percent I am mostly[br]comfortable, 10 percent somewhat,

0:58:47.726,0:58:52.606
1 percent I am uncomfortable, and[br]zero said I'm very uncomfortable.

0:58:53.086,0:58:58.666
So, what this is that people[br]seem to be in a pretty good place

0:58:58.666,0:59:02.686
with building partnerships[br]with fathers for the most part.

0:59:02.856,0:59:11.046
I think that, yeah, really the[br]large majority are going I am

0:59:11.046,0:59:13.826
mostly comfortable or above.

0:59:14.266,0:59:18.346
And I think that's great.

0:59:18.556,0:59:20.556
That's great.

0:59:20.556,0:59:22.556
Now, being comfortable[br]and engaging --

0:59:22.556,0:59:26.686
certainly the comfort level is[br]important to genuine engagement.

0:59:27.096,0:59:30.086
But, as I said before,[br]it's not just comfort,

0:59:30.086,0:59:33.076
its intentional things[br]that we do to do that.

0:59:33.166,0:59:35.166
But -- David: Exactly.

0:59:35.166,0:59:37.436
And so, let's move to the second[br]part of that polling question,

0:59:37.436,0:59:40.746
which actually speaks to competence[br]and the way you get to a place --

0:59:40.746,0:59:43.976
I think increasing competence goes[br]back to professional development.

0:59:43.976,0:59:47.956
So, this question says, have you[br]received professional development

0:59:47.956,0:59:51.076
around building supportive[br]partnerships with fathers?

0:59:51.076,0:59:54.596
So again, we ask you[br]to please weigh in.

0:59:55.796,0:59:58.866
Give you a few minutes to do that.

0:59:59.056,1:00:01.406
I have received extensive training.

1:00:01.606,1:00:04.456
I have received some training.

1:00:04.666,1:00:07.666
I have received a little training.

1:00:08.756,1:00:10.000
I have received no training.

1:00:11.256,1:00:27.596
[ Background Noise ]

1:00:28.096,1:00:31.086
David: Okay, Natalie can[br]you do the honors please.

1:00:31.296,1:00:33.296
Oh, I think you're right on time.

1:00:34.096,1:00:36.226
Wow, so look at this John.

1:00:36.226,1:00:38.226
John: Yeah.

1:00:38.226,1:00:40.226
David: A little bit different.

1:00:40.226,1:00:42.226
John: Yeah, yeah.

1:00:42.226,1:00:44.916
No, like eight percent - so, of[br]the respondents says this isn't --

1:00:44.916,1:00:46.916
this doesn't add up to 100 percent.

1:00:46.916,1:00:50.396
So, if this were 100[br]percent of the people

1:00:50.396,1:00:52.936
on the call these numbers[br]would actually be higher.

1:00:53.466,1:01:01.136
So, if you -- like so 16, so 24[br]percent are saying "received little

1:01:01.136,1:01:07.106
or no training" and that actually[br]probably would need to be increased

1:01:07.106,1:01:10.216
if we were looking at 100[br]percent because we're only talking

1:01:10.216,1:01:13.386
about maybe less than[br]50 percent here.

1:01:13.386,1:01:22.446
So, that's a pretty large portion[br]that haven't had specific training.

1:01:23.346,1:01:26.956
David: And again, what[br]that could result in is,

1:01:26.956,1:01:29.086
once we have a better[br]understanding about what some

1:01:29.086,1:01:32.526
of the limitations are for[br]programs around getting

1:01:32.526,1:01:34.526
that professional development,

1:01:34.526,1:01:36.536
is ways in which we[br]may be instrumental

1:01:36.536,1:01:38.746
in providing some support[br]and guidance around that.

1:01:38.836,1:01:41.726
That sounds like we should[br]be getting some inquiries

1:01:41.726,1:01:44.036
and some questions around[br]how programs might be able

1:01:44.036,1:01:46.036
to build their capacity to do this.

1:01:46.036,1:01:48.856
John: Yeah, I think that[br]both parts of this question,

1:01:50.376,1:01:53.126
it's also a reflection[br]of who called in.

1:01:53.446,1:01:55.446
David: Yes, oh go ahead.

1:01:55.446,1:01:58.166
John: So, we've got people on[br]the webinar that have an interest

1:01:58.166,1:02:02.646
and perhaps even a comfort[br]with working with fathers.

1:02:03.106,1:02:08.106
And not surprising that they would[br]want or expect a little bit more

1:02:08.146,1:02:10.146
in professional development.

1:02:10.146,1:02:12.146
David: Exactly.

1:02:12.146,1:02:14.146
John: Yeah.

1:02:14.146,1:02:16.146
David: Okay, so the[br]social worker in me,

1:02:16.146,1:02:18.146
or I would not actually be[br]true to the social worker

1:02:18.146,1:02:20.146
within me -- John: Yeah.

1:02:20.146,1:02:22.146
David: If I didn't ask you[br]to dig a little bit deeper

1:02:22.146,1:02:24.376
with a few rhetorical questions.

1:02:24.866,1:02:27.016
And they're up on the screen.

1:02:27.326,1:02:29.836
So, when we talk about what[br]does it mean to really connect

1:02:29.876,1:02:32.966
with fathers, some questions[br]that come to mind is,

1:02:33.016,1:02:35.016
what are the potential benefits?

1:02:35.016,1:02:37.016
What, if any, are the costs?

1:02:37.536,1:02:39.866
What might be some[br]unintended consequences?

1:02:40.006,1:02:42.396
And are there any other[br]potential concerns?

1:02:42.836,1:02:44.836
John: Uh huh.

1:02:44.836,1:02:46.836
David: So, for me, just[br]to prompt some discussion,

1:02:46.836,1:02:50.906
I think benefits are --[br]you have the opportunity

1:02:50.976,1:02:54.196
to receive another parent's[br]perspective on child development

1:02:54.446,1:02:58.716
and what's important to them[br]as it relates to their child.

1:02:58.716,1:03:03.036
You have opportunities to increase[br]staff competency and capacity

1:03:03.036,1:03:05.916
to communicate with[br]and support fathers.

1:03:06.286,1:03:11.016
And then you're also[br]increasing fathers comfort being

1:03:11.156,1:03:13.156
in the program environment.

1:03:13.926,1:03:16.516
The more comfortable they[br]are in the environment,

1:03:16.516,1:03:18.796
the more willing they are to engage

1:03:18.796,1:03:20.916
in the various activities[br]that are offered.

1:03:21.466,1:03:23.466
What are some of the costs?

1:03:23.976,1:03:28.056
Well again, we sometimes[br]push and encourage staff

1:03:28.596,1:03:30.596
to work outside of[br]their comfort zone.

1:03:30.596,1:03:33.476
We want them to be[br]intentionally different,

1:03:33.526,1:03:35.526
which is not necessarily[br]always easy to do.

1:03:35.536,1:03:39.976
We want them to be okay[br]with the time that it takes

1:03:40.176,1:03:42.176
for programs to transition.

1:03:42.176,1:03:44.176
And we don't talk[br]enough about this.

1:03:44.176,1:03:47.356
You know, you go from starting[br]to progressing to innovating.

1:03:47.806,1:03:50.236
Those are sort of three[br]different points of intersection,

1:03:50.236,1:03:54.546
but there could huge chasms between[br]what it means to go from starting

1:03:55.056,1:03:58.746
to progressing, from[br]progressing to innovating.

1:03:58.746,1:04:01.206
And few programs I've seen[br]are at that innovative place.

1:04:01.646,1:04:03.766
And some aspects of what[br]they do may be innovating,

1:04:03.766,1:04:05.766
but not as an entire program.

1:04:06.086,1:04:09.486
Ed, you had talked as we[br]were preparing for this

1:04:09.486,1:04:11.486
about some unintended consequences.

1:04:11.486,1:04:13.846
You want to speak to[br]that a little bit?

1:04:14.396,1:04:17.266
Edwin: The intended[br]consequences, oh God.

1:04:17.696,1:04:19.696
I can't remember where[br]I was at with that.

1:04:19.696,1:04:21.696
We were just sitting there[br]talking about different things.

1:04:21.696,1:04:24.076
But, I think -- David: You were --[br]I can just prompt you a little bit.

1:04:24.076,1:04:29.166
You were talking about some of the[br]reaction of some of the mothers

1:04:29.166,1:04:31.306
and -- Edwin: Oh yeah, exactly.

1:04:31.306,1:04:33.846
You know, I know that[br]when I first came

1:04:33.846,1:04:36.426
into the program there was[br]really nothing geared to fathers,

1:04:36.426,1:04:38.426
and that was the whole[br]initiative behind this.

1:04:38.426,1:04:41.056
But, now that the strength of the[br]fathers has started to come in,

1:04:41.056,1:04:45.116
I think the women were feeling[br]a little bit left out and again,

1:04:45.116,1:04:47.116
that's where the consequences were.

1:04:47.116,1:04:50.256
Again, you know it's hard to[br]just, you know, really, you know,

1:04:50.256,1:04:53.096
to focus on just 100[br]percent of either or.

1:04:53.476,1:04:56.876
So, you know, that was kind of[br]a challenge that we're facing.

1:04:57.126,1:05:01.506
And so, the women started their[br]group up again, and again,

1:05:01.506,1:05:03.826
you know, it's good and[br]it's all well and good.

1:05:03.826,1:05:07.616
We all work together as a team,[br]but again, you know, it was like --

1:05:07.616,1:05:11.006
I think the women were feeling[br]a little left out of the loop

1:05:11.006,1:05:14.066
because more dads -- we were[br]actually having a lot more dads

1:05:14.066,1:05:18.336
coming into program and, you know,[br]before when it used to be kind

1:05:18.336,1:05:20.336
of pretty much women-based.

1:05:20.336,1:05:23.816
And even going on further out of[br]the Head Start program, you know,

1:05:23.816,1:05:28.416
we see a lot more fathers now at[br]WIC, Child Find, all those things.

1:05:28.416,1:05:30.546
And, I don't -- I'm not[br]going to say it's entirely

1:05:30.546,1:05:32.546
because of our fatherhood program,

1:05:32.556,1:05:36.386
but I think that men are feeling[br]more comfortable and in coming

1:05:36.386,1:05:38.386
into these types of environments.

1:05:38.386,1:05:42.466
John: Yeah, it's -- yeah I[br]think that it's a challenge

1:05:42.466,1:05:46.816
because it takes some skill[br]on the part of a staff person

1:05:46.816,1:05:48.816
when both the parents are there.

1:05:48.816,1:05:50.816
Who do you talk to?

1:05:50.816,1:05:52.816
And if you're talking[br]to the father --

1:05:52.816,1:05:55.116
I actually know a mother[br]who told me this is --

1:05:55.116,1:05:57.436
why are you talking to him?

1:05:57.436,1:05:59.836
I know the answers[br]to your questions.

1:05:59.836,1:06:01.836
He doesn't.

1:06:01.836,1:06:05.216
And so, you get into those[br]kind of gate keeping kind

1:06:05.216,1:06:07.216
of issues around the child.

1:06:07.216,1:06:10.936
So, it's harder to talk to two[br]people at once then to one.

1:06:10.936,1:06:13.546
So, I think the consequences[br]are kind

1:06:13.546,1:06:15.546
of professional development[br]consequences

1:06:15.546,1:06:19.086
and skill consequences[br]on top of it, yeah.

1:06:19.086,1:06:22.016
David: Any other potential[br]concerns, John, that you would --

1:06:22.586,1:06:27.766
John: Well, it may actually, and[br]that brings up the next slide.

1:06:27.766,1:06:34.406
You know, in dealing with men[br]who are nurturing young children,

1:06:34.706,1:06:36.706
there may be some[br]elephants in the room.

1:06:37.246,1:06:39.716
And, maybe I just stop[br]for a moment and --

1:06:39.966,1:06:42.036
this is an awful cute[br]elephant though David.

1:06:42.036,1:06:44.816
It's -- David: It is.

1:06:45.346,1:06:47.346
Edwin: It is Dave.

1:06:47.346,1:06:50.556
John: But, this, you know, what[br]is the elephant in the room?

1:06:50.856,1:06:57.556
What is there between women who[br]care for young children and men,

1:06:57.636,1:07:01.596
who come into the program, who[br]are the fathers of those children,

1:07:01.716,1:07:06.056
or the men in the mothers[br]of those children's lives?

1:07:06.726,1:07:13.446
And the larger kind of elephant[br]in the room, in my opinion,

1:07:13.476,1:07:19.596
in having done a lot of this work[br]over the years, is that all of us,

1:07:19.656,1:07:24.056
men and women, have, kind of,

1:07:24.056,1:07:26.736
previous relationships[br]with men in our lives.

1:07:26.736,1:07:29.966
You know, whether it's our[br]fathers, or whether it's that game

1:07:29.966,1:07:36.676
that so many people play from early[br]adolescence on, and in high school

1:07:36.676,1:07:41.276
about relations between the[br]sexes, in that those dynamics

1:07:41.416,1:07:50.446
of how you talk to men period can[br]enter into a conversation about --

1:07:50.606,1:07:52.966
that have kind of under the[br]surface when you're talking

1:07:52.966,1:07:54.966
about the care of a child.

1:07:54.966,1:07:59.516
And so, I think it's raising that[br]elephant in the room, kind of,

1:07:59.516,1:08:04.786
as David has portrayed it, as not[br]necessarily operating all the time

1:08:04.786,1:08:08.396
or preventing good[br]communications from happening.

1:08:08.756,1:08:12.546
But, I think we do have to[br]acknowledge that the game,

1:08:12.656,1:08:16.636
the various kind of communications[br]that go on between men and women

1:08:16.636,1:08:21.126
in our society often involve the --

1:08:21.126,1:08:23.725
you know, other things than[br]caring for young children.

1:08:24.336,1:08:28.296
And again, to bring that to[br]awareness is probably an important

1:08:28.296,1:08:30.756
part of a professional[br]development program.

1:08:31.526,1:08:33.586
David: It really is.

1:08:33.935,1:08:37.796
And just I think really a few[br]other important things to add

1:08:37.796,1:08:39.796
to it you've already said.

1:08:39.796,1:08:41.906
You know this brings[br]up sort of implications

1:08:41.906,1:08:47.316
for how you support families,[br]particularly fathers,

1:08:47.316,1:08:50.536
around substance abuse issues[br]and domestic violence issues

1:08:50.536,1:08:54.026
and even just fear issues[br]of what it means to connect

1:08:54.026,1:08:57.645
and build a relationship[br]given the sexual tension

1:08:57.645,1:08:59.645
that takes place between[br]men and women.

1:08:59.645,1:09:01.645
John: Yeah.

1:09:01.645,1:09:03.645
Edwin: David.

1:09:03.645,1:09:05.645
David: Yes.

1:09:05.645,1:09:07.645
Edwin: This is Ed.

1:09:07.645,1:09:09.645
Again, just talking[br]about the elephant,

1:09:09.645,1:09:11.645
I think from the native perspective[br]also again, a lot of it has to do

1:09:11.645,1:09:13.645
with our historical traumas.

1:09:13.645,1:09:15.645
You know again, you're looking[br]back at what men versus women,

1:09:15.645,1:09:19.296
what their -- what we're --[br]what is culturally appropriate

1:09:19.296,1:09:21.296
at that time.

1:09:21.296,1:09:23.296
David: Right.

1:09:23.296,1:09:25.296
Edwin: That's some[br]of the major impacts

1:09:25.296,1:09:27.296
of some of our programs here.

1:09:27.296,1:09:29.296
You know [inaudible] that you[br]know the elephant is right there

1:09:29.296,1:09:31.296
on your back, you know.

1:09:31.296,1:09:33.296
Again, that's where we're --

1:09:33.296,1:09:35.296
you know, we have a lot of[br]these social emotional issues.

1:09:35.296,1:09:37.296
And, all the economic health and[br]wellbeing of our children are kind

1:09:37.296,1:09:41.246
of compromised because of sometimes[br]those cultural -- I'm not --

1:09:41.246,1:09:45.296
in a sense inadequacies, or I don't[br]know if that's the right term,

1:09:45.296,1:09:48.076
but that's something[br]that sometimes we kind

1:09:48.076,1:09:50.076
of have to face here in Laguna.

1:09:51.176,1:09:53.176
>> Oh.

1:09:53.176,1:09:55.176
>> Yeah. David: Okay, thank you.

1:09:55.176,1:09:57.606
So, we will move along.

1:09:58.186,1:10:02.106
John, this is you.

1:10:02.106,1:10:04.106
John: Yeah, yeah.

1:10:04.106,1:10:08.536
I think that this area -- and I[br]love these pictures by the way.

1:10:09.216,1:10:12.326
The -- look at the engagement.

1:10:12.326,1:10:15.156
Look at like the man, the woman

1:10:15.206,1:10:18.266
and the kids all paying[br]attention to the same thing.

1:10:18.266,1:10:20.876
So much learning is[br]happening when you see that.

1:10:20.936,1:10:24.436
And I just love the[br]picture down below.

1:10:24.436,1:10:26.436
You can see how the kids just --

1:10:26.436,1:10:28.436
this child that's on[br]the carpet is just

1:10:28.436,1:10:30.446
like loving looking up at this guy.

1:10:30.446,1:10:33.396
I don't know what he's[br]saying, but it's --

1:10:33.396,1:10:36.506
he certainly has engagement[br]from the children right there.

1:10:37.096,1:10:42.996
The program environment, I think,[br]you might ask the fathers what it's

1:10:42.996,1:10:44.996
like to walk into your program.

1:10:44.996,1:10:47.846
The experience of a father[br]walking into a program

1:10:47.846,1:10:50.096
with young children[br]that's designed by women,

1:10:50.096,1:10:54.936
and I've got numerous slides[br]of program environments,

1:10:54.936,1:10:57.836
and I can put them up there and[br]say, you know, "is this comfortable

1:10:57.836,1:10:59.836
for most men to walk into".

1:10:59.836,1:11:01.836
The step across the threshold

1:11:01.836,1:11:04.806
into the program may feel[br]very different -- David: Yeah.

1:11:04.806,1:11:06.806
John: -- for a man.

1:11:06.806,1:11:08.806
So, I think it's very[br]valuable to think

1:11:08.806,1:11:11.636
about you know is this a[br]welcoming environment for a man?

1:11:11.636,1:11:13.636
That doesn't mean you have[br]to have like deer heads

1:11:13.636,1:11:15.636
on the wall or anything.

1:11:15.636,1:11:19.436
What it means is you know[br]having pictures of men,

1:11:20.246,1:11:23.846
having the size seats[br]somewhere that they can fit in.

1:11:24.026,1:11:26.796
And really, I think, you[br]can probably go to men

1:11:26.796,1:11:28.796
and have them walk in and see.

1:11:28.866,1:11:33.566
But, it's almost less a physical[br]environment than it's the, kind of,

1:11:33.746,1:11:35.746
interpersonal environment.

1:11:35.746,1:11:37.746
And, that goes back

1:11:37.746,1:11:39.796
to the relationships[br]on the framework slide.

1:11:40.046,1:11:44.166
Is -- is it a welcoming[br]place when a man walks

1:11:44.166,1:11:47.416
into the door with a child.

1:11:47.786,1:11:52.516
Since most of you said you were[br]comfortable you probably have those

1:11:52.516,1:11:57.976
places, but it's something again to[br]be -- to think intentionally about.

1:11:58.496,1:12:05.076
I -- the other one that's circled[br]here is teaching and learning

1:12:05.076,1:12:07.556
and I already addressed[br]the pictures.

1:12:07.556,1:12:10.896
But, when men come into[br]volunteer the classroom,

1:12:10.896,1:12:13.276
their interactions may[br]look a little different

1:12:13.306,1:12:16.176
than you would expect[br]when a mother comes in.

1:12:16.386,1:12:19.086
The instruction may[br]not be quite as direct.

1:12:19.086,1:12:22.266
It might a little bit wilder.

1:12:22.266,1:12:27.676
That's not to say that some women[br]won't come in and be quite loud

1:12:27.676,1:12:29.676
when they come into the classroom.

1:12:29.676,1:12:31.676
I certainly have seen that.

1:12:31.676,1:12:34.346
But, the frame is different.

1:12:34.346,1:12:37.506
The interactions may look a[br]little different and they,

1:12:37.506,1:12:39.506
as I pointed out in[br]the research slide,

1:12:39.526,1:12:42.386
those kind of interactions[br]have benefits for kids as well.

1:12:42.676,1:12:44.676
David: Awesome.

1:12:44.676,1:12:52.916
And so now we have the distinct[br]pleasure of having Edwin Cheromiah,

1:12:52.916,1:12:56.716
Sr. talk specifically[br]about what all this looks

1:12:56.716,1:12:59.106
like within the context[br]of a program.

1:12:59.396,1:13:01.396
So, Ed I'm going to[br]turn it over to you.

1:13:01.656,1:13:04.146
Edwin Cheromiah, Sr.:[br]Alright, thank you very much,

1:13:04.146,1:13:06.146
and thank you for having me.

1:13:06.146,1:13:08.146
I do appreciate it.

1:13:08.146,1:13:10.146
Again, this is just, kind[br]of, a picture of, you know,

1:13:10.436,1:13:14.676
really good feelings at the Head[br]Start with the rainbow showing,

1:13:14.906,1:13:18.756
depicting you know that[br]children are very important,

1:13:18.796,1:13:21.676
sacred in our lives here[br]at the Head Start program.

1:13:21.676,1:13:23.966
I just have a few[br]slides here just too kind

1:13:23.966,1:13:27.616
of depict some of those things.

1:13:27.936,1:13:29.936
[inaudible] okay.

1:13:29.936,1:13:31.936
We were talking about all the[br]things that we have just talked

1:13:31.936,1:13:34.386
about coming from the[br]beginning of the slides.

1:13:34.706,1:13:37.026
Here are things that we're[br]attempting to do here

1:13:37.026,1:13:39.826
at the program is to[br]make sure that we ensure

1:13:39.826,1:13:41.926
that we support fathers[br]in every way.

1:13:42.006,1:13:44.536
And, a lot of that has[br]to deal with, you know,

1:13:44.886,1:13:46.886
making them feel comfortable.

1:13:46.886,1:13:52.046
The picture on the upper left[br]hand corner there is a picture

1:13:52.046,1:13:56.796
of just some dads who were[br]helping with an activity,

1:13:56.796,1:13:59.246
and I believe it was[br]our Easter activity.

1:13:59.646,1:14:02.936
And, you know, the dads are[br]coming in doing that more because,

1:14:02.936,1:14:08.086
I think, the teachers are more[br]engaging with their fathers

1:14:08.086,1:14:10.466
as they're coming and they're[br]making them feel comfortable,

1:14:10.756,1:14:13.486
knowing that they[br]are important part

1:14:13.486,1:14:16.346
of their child's upbringing[br]and wellbeing.

1:14:16.746,1:14:21.326
Again, we always encourage[br]parents, dads, to come in

1:14:21.326,1:14:26.566
and show their talents and that was[br]just a picture they had taken of me

1:14:26.566,1:14:29.756
as I was talking to[br]the kids about music.

1:14:29.756,1:14:32.356
And there's other things that[br]we do in the culturally --

1:14:32.696,1:14:35.036
the cultural way of[br]things, you know,

1:14:35.036,1:14:37.036
our cultural traditional dances.

1:14:37.326,1:14:41.466
We encourage dads to come in and[br]sing songs for their parents.

1:14:41.466,1:14:43.466
I'm sorry, sing songs[br]for their kids.

1:14:43.896,1:14:46.086
They are helping making the --

1:14:46.186,1:14:50.036
our traditional costumes[br]for the dances.

1:14:50.036,1:14:52.386
They're making -- the teachers[br]are absolutely making them,

1:14:52.806,1:14:54.806
you know, feel comfortable here.

1:14:54.806,1:14:59.076
And, of course we always have the[br]challenges all the time still yet,

1:14:59.076,1:15:01.076
but I think that's[br]also helping them

1:15:01.076,1:15:06.776
with helping the men set[br]goals, set priorities.

1:15:07.056,1:15:12.566
And also again, you know if[br]a child comes in with an IEP

1:15:12.596,1:15:15.836
or [inaudible] you know the dads[br]are more comfortable knowing

1:15:15.836,1:15:18.966
that they can do these[br]things for their kids.

1:15:19.356,1:15:23.586
Like I said, we include[br]fathers in classroom activities.

1:15:23.846,1:15:25.846
We have literacy programs to --

1:15:25.846,1:15:28.456
where dads are coming in[br]and reading to the children.

1:15:28.456,1:15:33.176
There's also programs to where[br]we're teaching Keres language

1:15:33.176,1:15:37.556
to the kids and we have actually[br]in our program one, two -

1:15:37.556,1:15:41.596
two teachers that actually speak[br]-- teach the Keres language.

1:15:41.676,1:15:45.156
And we also have two[br]custodians and a male cook.

1:15:45.156,1:15:48.076
So we're starting to get[br]more male involvement

1:15:48.076,1:15:51.966
because of just the comfort[br]level that they feel right now.

1:15:51.966,1:15:57.006
And again, all of it is just to[br]ensure that the kids are ready

1:15:57.006,1:15:59.006
for the next level of education.

1:16:00.086,1:16:02.086
Again, on the -- we --

1:16:02.086,1:16:05.746
I also coordinate a[br]monthly fatherhood night.

1:16:06.006,1:16:09.086
And that's what we call them, just[br]simply as that, fatherhood nights.

1:16:09.476,1:16:12.826
And I have a grandparent here, if[br]you don't mind, I'd like for him

1:16:12.826,1:16:15.366
to kind of give an idea[br]of you know is perspective

1:16:15.366,1:16:17.366
on our fatherhood nights.

1:16:17.436,1:16:21.846
Wilbur Lockwood: Yeah, I'm Wilbur[br]Lockwood, and I'm a grandparent

1:16:21.986,1:16:24.976
to the fatherhood[br]organization here in Laguna.

1:16:24.976,1:16:31.436
And they been very instrumental[br]to spelling out different things

1:16:31.436,1:16:37.256
that need to be possibly addressed,[br]not only traditionally wise,

1:16:37.256,1:16:41.836
but how we can go ahead and[br]be a better parent, I guess,

1:16:41.836,1:16:43.836
is what it is, you know.

1:16:43.836,1:16:49.506
Nowadays we've got a lot of young[br]parents out there with kids that,

1:16:49.506,1:16:55.316
really, they don't know how[br]to run or raise as a family.

1:16:55.316,1:17:01.966
And, in order to do that then we,[br]you know, we all sit down together

1:17:02.066,1:17:08.056
and offer suggestions of what[br]we need to do, maybe possibly

1:17:08.056,1:17:13.046
to better each other in raising[br]our kids or grandfathering,

1:17:13.046,1:17:15.916
grandmothering our kids and also

1:17:15.916,1:17:19.016
that they can have a[br]productive life when --

1:17:19.086,1:17:24.876
whether they leave the reservation[br]or not, and go out into the world,

1:17:25.636,1:17:28.296
which is like when Ed[br]mentioned about seed planting.

1:17:28.296,1:17:33.226
You know, that's one of the things[br]that we try to stress that life is

1:17:33.226,1:17:35.226
like a seed, you put[br]it in the ground

1:17:35.226,1:17:37.226
and it grows and spreads out.

1:17:37.666,1:17:46.526
Well, that's basically how our life[br]is, is you know we put ourselves

1:17:46.526,1:17:51.696
on the pedestal and let our[br]parents teach us different things.

1:17:51.696,1:17:56.696
And not necessarily we try to[br]avoid all the bad stuff, but still

1:17:56.696,1:18:00.996
yet you know somehow, somewhere[br]they get in there and all.

1:18:01.556,1:18:06.056
But, we try to tell the fathers,[br]you know, try to live as an example

1:18:07.536,1:18:09.536
for your own kids[br]and love your kids.

1:18:09.536,1:18:12.976
You know it's not, not to[br]a point to where you --

1:18:13.676,1:18:16.916
it's embarrassing when you go[br]up to your child and hug them

1:18:16.916,1:18:20.246
or give them a kiss on[br]the cheek or whatever

1:18:20.246,1:18:22.436
and say, you know, "I love you".

1:18:22.436,1:18:25.866
And all the sudden we see[br]that on the reservation

1:18:25.866,1:18:29.436
because that's not part[br]of us really and all.

1:18:29.436,1:18:34.236
But, you know Ed has gone out[br]of his way, I think anyway,

1:18:34.236,1:18:38.096
to really try to stress that[br]to us fathers out there;

1:18:38.096,1:18:42.646
his nightly meetings that[br]he has every month and all.

1:18:43.266,1:18:46.726
If we could get more[br]fathers in there,

1:18:46.726,1:18:51.946
I think basically we can have a[br]better working relationship among

1:18:51.946,1:18:54.916
each other and among[br]their own families

1:18:54.916,1:18:56.916
out there in the community.

1:18:56.916,1:18:58.916
Edwin Cheromiah, Sr.: Right,[br]just some of the things

1:18:58.916,1:19:00.916
that we've been doing along[br]them with our father program.

1:19:00.916,1:19:02.916
And again, the expected[br]outcomes, of course,

1:19:02.916,1:19:04.916
is to overcome some[br]of the barriers.

1:19:04.916,1:19:06.916
And this, kind of, picture[br]depicts some of those things,

1:19:06.916,1:19:10.276
overcoming barriers to[br]improve positive involvement

1:19:10.276,1:19:12.276
in our children.

1:19:12.276,1:19:15.276
This is something just called a[br]jackrabbit shuffle that, you know,

1:19:15.276,1:19:17.896
that was created by Dr.[br]Clayton Small in the Road

1:19:17.896,1:19:20.036
of Life curriculum,[br]which we also use here.

1:19:20.366,1:19:24.106
And also it's culturally[br]appropriate.

1:19:24.196,1:19:27.776
It's educational, especially,[br]you know, again, it helps.

1:19:28.196,1:19:30.196
You know, it helps,[br]especially if it's --

1:19:30.196,1:19:33.556
and that's the parent coming in for[br]the first time seeing these things,

1:19:33.556,1:19:35.686
how important it is to drop[br]some of those barriers.

1:19:36.016,1:19:39.076
So again, that's all[br]to increase, you know,

1:19:39.076,1:19:41.766
just fatherhood involvement.

1:19:41.766,1:19:46.616
We are also developing[br]fathers and cultural fathers

1:19:46.616,1:19:50.056
and children's cultural[br]development.

1:19:50.136,1:19:52.486
This particular slide[br]here is a father.

1:19:52.486,1:19:56.556
This father is teaching[br]these children our annual --

1:19:56.556,1:20:00.326
it's called a -- it's[br]called the Corn Dance.

1:20:00.326,1:20:04.916
And it's, again, going back into[br]preservation of our livelihood

1:20:05.096,1:20:08.966
and hoping and praying for[br]rain so that we can plant --

1:20:08.966,1:20:11.596
the seed has been planted[br]will continue to grow

1:20:11.596,1:20:13.596
and also flourishes[br]back into the children.

1:20:13.936,1:20:17.336
So, those are some of the things[br]that we've been really working

1:20:17.336,1:20:19.646
at here at the Laguna[br]Head Start Program.

1:20:19.786,1:20:23.336
And again, this is just a group[br]picture of some of the guys

1:20:23.336,1:20:26.296
that have been here[br]throughout the years.

1:20:26.706,1:20:29.876
This guy in the center holding[br]the ribbon has been a very

1:20:29.876,1:20:31.876
instrumental part.

1:20:31.876,1:20:33.876
He no longer has children[br]here at Head Start

1:20:33.876,1:20:35.876
but continues to come back.

1:20:35.876,1:20:38.056
And he was one of the guys back in[br]'04 that started the whole program.

1:20:38.466,1:20:41.066
And the guy off to the[br]left-hand side behind him

1:20:41.066,1:20:43.066
on the back row there with the cap,

1:20:43.066,1:20:45.356
the big guy with the big[br]cheesy smile, he's also.

1:20:45.596,1:20:51.126
And the guy also, kind of, with[br]his hand over his shoulder is a --

1:20:51.126,1:20:53.126
oh wow, what's happening?

1:20:53.306,1:20:55.306
Did something there.

1:20:55.306,1:20:57.306
How I'd get out of that?

1:20:57.306,1:20:59.306
David: That's alright[br]just go ahead.

1:20:59.306,1:21:01.306
Edwin Cheromiah, Sr.:[br]He's one of the guys --

1:21:01.306,1:21:04.256
those are the men that have really[br]pushed this program along before he

1:21:04.256,1:21:06.256
came to Head Start.

1:21:06.256,1:21:08.646
It was first done under the,[br]the -- what was it called now?

1:21:08.646,1:21:12.766
The oh, PFS, Partners[br]For Success Program,

1:21:12.766,1:21:15.176
and they eventually[br]came here to Laguna.

1:21:15.176,1:21:18.306
But right now this -- our mission[br]statement kind of says that all --

1:21:18.356,1:21:20.356
summarizes everything[br]that we're trying

1:21:20.356,1:21:22.356
to do here at Laguna Head Start.

1:21:22.356,1:21:24.356
And our mission is just this,

1:21:24.896,1:21:27.146
the mission at Laguna[br]Fatherhood Group is

1:21:27.146,1:21:31.406
to support fathers interested[br]in contributing their skills

1:21:32.366,1:21:35.086
and resources for the development[br]of their children at home,

1:21:35.116,1:21:37.516
in the community and school[br]settings, all the things

1:21:37.516,1:21:39.516
that we've been just, kind of,

1:21:39.516,1:21:41.516
talking about all[br]throughout the whole slides.

1:21:41.516,1:21:44.256
So, again that's kind of[br]what we do here at Laguna.

1:21:44.536,1:21:46.536
And if there's any, you know --

1:21:46.536,1:21:48.536
I would encourage[br]anyone to give us a call

1:21:48.536,1:21:51.246
and we can always talk a[br]little bit more about this.

1:21:51.246,1:21:53.786
So again, that's kind of[br]my presentation there.

1:21:53.856,1:21:55.856
Thank you.

1:21:55.856,1:21:57.856
David: Yep, one more.

1:21:57.856,1:22:02.396
>> Okay, oh this is the[br]Father Engagement Resources?

1:22:02.826,1:22:04.826
Kiersten: Yep.

1:22:04.826,1:22:07.996
I think -- this is Kiersten,[br]and I know we're wrapping up.

1:22:08.156,1:22:10.676
We're probably going to go a couple[br]minutes over for those of us --

1:22:10.816,1:22:14.946
for those of you who want to stick[br]around for another five minutes.

1:22:15.606,1:22:19.456
We -- I want to just let you know[br]a little bit about the resources

1:22:19.456,1:22:21.456
that we keep referring to.

1:22:21.536,1:22:23.736
The Head Start Father[br]Engagement Birth

1:22:23.736,1:22:26.376
to Five Programming[br]Guide just came out today

1:22:26.376,1:22:28.766
with an information[br]memorandum to all programs.

1:22:28.916,1:22:34.256
Las Manos de Apรก is a set of[br]resources for programs for working

1:22:34.326,1:22:37.396
with Latino fathers around[br]supporting their relationships

1:22:37.396,1:22:40.236
with their young children,[br]particularly around literacy.

1:22:40.236,1:22:42.766
There's support group[br]curriculum and training material.

1:22:43.726,1:22:47.986
We also have a couple of[br]videos that we're sharing.

1:22:47.986,1:22:52.806
The Best Practices Series that[br]the National Center is doing.

1:22:52.806,1:22:54.806
This is the first in the[br]series that we're putting

1:22:54.806,1:22:56.806
out called Engaging Fathers

1:22:56.806,1:22:59.246
and Engaging Young Fathers[br]Through Support Groups.

1:22:59.246,1:23:04.516
These are basically -- they'll[br]be some facilitation guides

1:23:04.516,1:23:08.996
to support training conversations[br]and group interactions

1:23:08.996,1:23:12.946
with staff around, kind of, what[br]your takeaways from the videos are.

1:23:12.946,1:23:14.946
So, these are, kind of --

1:23:14.946,1:23:16.946
can function like exercises[br]in your program for thinking

1:23:16.946,1:23:18.946
about father engagement.

1:23:18.946,1:23:23.496
There was a -- I'm sorry that our[br]public chat wasn't working so well.

1:23:23.906,1:23:25.906
I appreciated some of the comments.

1:23:25.906,1:23:28.406
Janus McBride had[br]talked about, you know,

1:23:28.656,1:23:32.296
just really reiterating the point[br]that you really need staff buy-in

1:23:32.726,1:23:35.746
in terms of, you know,[br]getting father engagement,

1:23:35.746,1:23:37.746
involvement going.

1:23:37.746,1:23:39.746
Otherwise, it's a real struggle.

1:23:39.746,1:23:41.746
And there was a question[br]about the PowerPoint.

1:23:41.746,1:23:43.766
This PowerPoint won't be[br]shared, but the resources --

1:23:43.766,1:23:46.906
there are a lot of training[br]material in the resources

1:23:46.906,1:23:48.906
that we've talked about.

1:23:48.906,1:23:52.096
And you can contact us for[br]specific things that you're looking

1:23:52.096,1:23:55.876
for from the PowerPoint[br]if you're wanting

1:23:55.876,1:23:58.176
to support a particular[br]exercise, that kind of thing.

1:23:58.426,1:24:00.936
We'd be happy to share it.

1:24:00.936,1:24:02.936
So, David, I think,[br]if you want to take us

1:24:02.976,1:24:05.096
out with some summarizing points

1:24:05.096,1:24:07.096
about what we've talked[br]about today.

1:24:07.096,1:24:13.796
David: Sure, so our last slide[br]just really underscores everything

1:24:13.796,1:24:17.066
that we discussed, basically[br]saying that fathers are important

1:24:17.066,1:24:19.066
to their children,[br]which all of you know,

1:24:19.066,1:24:21.626
their families and[br]their communities.

1:24:22.016,1:24:25.436
You know, the relationship[br]building with fathers is key,

1:24:25.806,1:24:27.806
looking at the program leadership,

1:24:27.896,1:24:29.896
the continuous improvement[br]processes,

1:24:29.906,1:24:32.166
professional development, all of[br]those things that we discussed.

1:24:32.976,1:24:35.366
Utilize these resources[br]that we're providing to you

1:24:35.366,1:24:38.816
to really assess your family[br]and your father engagement.

1:24:39.526,1:24:41.526
Hold thoughtful conversations,

1:24:41.526,1:24:43.526
even some of the challenging[br]conversations

1:24:43.526,1:24:45.526
that you may need to have.

1:24:45.526,1:24:47.526
When we say let's have[br]a real conversation

1:24:47.526,1:24:49.526
and you know what that means.

1:24:49.526,1:24:51.526
You know, conduct some real[br]program planning on how to do this.

1:24:51.526,1:24:54.016
Make this integrated[br]throughout your entire program.

1:24:54.576,1:24:56.576
Engage in staff development.

1:24:56.576,1:24:58.576
Implement and evaluate and review.

1:24:58.576,1:25:00.646
And, celebrate fathers[br]and families.

1:25:00.646,1:25:03.616
This is our time to not only[br]do it just because it's June

1:25:03.616,1:25:07.886
and it's Father's Day approaching,[br]but fathers are so instrumental

1:25:08.116,1:25:10.426
to their families and their[br]communities and we want

1:25:10.426,1:25:12.536
to make sure that you're thinking[br]about that throughout the year.

1:25:12.896,1:25:17.006
I want to take this time[br]to really thank first

1:25:17.006,1:25:19.726
and foremost Yvette Sanchez[br]Fuentes, our fearless leader,

1:25:20.166,1:25:22.676
the Director of the Office of[br]Head Start, for just supporting

1:25:22.766,1:25:27.256
such important work; Edwin[br]and John for co-facilitating;

1:25:28.156,1:25:30.856
Kiersten Biegel, who[br]is an absolute gem,

1:25:31.116,1:25:33.116
and without whom I'm not[br]sure we would have been able

1:25:33.116,1:25:35.116
to pull all of this off this week.

1:25:35.116,1:25:37.116
Thank you so much.

1:25:37.116,1:25:39.626
The National Center on Parent,[br]Family and Community Engagement,

1:25:39.626,1:25:44.376
our technical support team at[br]I-Link, Natalie and Sam and all

1:25:44.376,1:25:46.376
of the participants who[br]joined us for this webinar.

1:25:47.256,1:25:50.466
It is extremely important[br]to note that we are aware

1:25:50.826,1:25:53.696
of the great work that's[br]taking place in programs

1:25:53.696,1:25:56.376
across the country and through[br]some collaborative partnerships

1:25:56.376,1:25:58.376
that you've established.

1:25:58.376,1:26:00.696
Our only goal is to[br]provide tangible resources

1:26:00.696,1:26:02.696
that can increase the likelihood

1:26:02.796,1:26:06.706
that your father engagement efforts[br]are not tied to an individual

1:26:07.046,1:26:11.756
or external consultant, but are[br]connected to an integrated system

1:26:11.756,1:26:14.396
of meaningful services[br]with fathers, children

1:26:14.796,1:26:22.346
and families, and we thank you.

1:26:22.936,1:26:25.796
Kiersten. Kiersten:[br]Thanks everybody.

1:26:26.936,1:26:29.246
John: That was awesome, David.

1:26:30.026,1:26:33.506
David: That was a wonderful[br]job all the way around guys.

1:26:33.596,1:26:35.596
Thank you so, so much.

1:26:35.596,1:26:37.596
Thank you all the participants.

1:26:37.596,1:26:39.596
I think people are[br]starting to sign out.

1:26:39.596,1:26:41.596
So, we don't have[br]time for questions

1:26:41.596,1:26:43.596
but I guess people will email us.

1:26:43.646,1:26:45.646
>> Okay, that sounds great.

1:26:45.816,1:26:47.816
>> Alright, thank you very much.

1:26:47.816,1:26:49.816
>> Thank you.

1:26:49.816,1:26:51.816
>> Thanks everyone.

1:26:51.816,1:26:53.816
>> Thank you.

1:26:53.816,1:26:55.816
>> Goodbye we'll see you all.

1:26:55.816,1:26:57.816
>> We'll talk to you soon.

1:26:57.816,1:26:59.816
>> Very soon.