0:00:14.668,0:00:16.991
Inner North London, top floor flat

0:00:16.991,0:00:20.045
All white walls, white carpet, white cat,

0:00:20.045,0:00:21.982
Rice Paper partitions,

0:00:21.982,0:00:23.567
Modern art and ambition

0:00:23.567,0:00:25.045
The host’s a physician,

0:00:25.045,0:00:26.563
Bright bloke, has his own practice

0:00:26.563,0:00:27.770
His girlfriend’s an actress

0:00:27.770,0:00:29.425
An old mate of ours from home

0:00:29.425,0:00:30.952
And they’re always great fun.

0:00:30.952,0:00:33.392
So to dinner we’ve come.

0:00:34.931,0:00:36.903
The 5th guest is an unknown,

0:00:36.903,0:00:39.298
The hosts have just thrown us together for a favor

0:00:39.298,0:00:41.383
'cause this girl’s just arrived from Australia

0:00:41.383,0:00:42.770
And she's moved to North London

0:00:42.770,0:00:44.124
And she’s the sister of someone

0:00:44.124,0:00:46.099
Or has some connection.

0:00:46.099,0:00:47.731
As we make introductions

0:00:47.731,0:00:49.562
I’m struck by her beauty

0:00:49.562,0:00:51.166
She’s irrefutably fair

0:00:51.166,0:00:53.302
With dark eyes and dark hair

0:00:53.302,0:00:54.614
But as she sits

0:00:54.614,0:00:56.745
I admit I’m a little bit wary

0:00:56.745,0:00:59.348
because I notice the tip of the wing of a fairy

0:00:59.348,0:01:01.312
Tattooed on that popular area

0:01:01.312,0:01:02.675
Just above the derrière

0:01:02.675,0:01:05.003
And when she says “I’m Sagittarien”

0:01:05.003,0:01:08.345
I confess a pigeonhole starts to form

0:01:08.345,0:01:10.333
And is immediately filled with pigeon

0:01:10.333,0:01:14.083
When she says her name is Storm.

0:01:14.760,0:01:17.559
Conversation is initially bright and light hearted

0:01:17.559,0:01:20.258
But it’s not long before Storm gets started:

0:01:20.258,0:01:22.085
“You can’t know anything,

0:01:22.085,0:01:24.082
Knowledge is merely opinion”

0:01:24.082,0:01:26.898
She opines, over her Cabernet Sauvignon

0:01:26.898,0:01:27.545
Vis a vis

0:01:27.545,0:01:29.045
Some unhippily

0:01:29.045,0:01:31.562
Empirical comment made by me

0:01:31.562,0:01:33.242
“Not a good start” I think

0:01:33.242,0:01:34.735
We’re only on pre-dinner drinks

0:01:34.735,0:01:36.265
And across the room, my wife

0:01:36.265,0:01:37.622
Widens her eyes

0:01:37.622,0:01:39.640
Silently begs me: Be Nice!

0:01:39.640,0:01:40.820
A matrimonial warning

0:01:40.820,0:01:42.236
Not worth ignoring

0:01:42.236,0:01:44.179
So I resist the urge to ask Storm

0:01:44.179,0:01:46.229
Whether knowledge is so loose-weave

0:01:46.229,0:01:47.456
Of a morning

0:01:47.456,0:01:48.630
When deciding whether to leave

0:01:48.630,0:01:50.734
Her apartment by the front door

0:01:50.734,0:01:53.969
Or a window on her second floor.

0:01:54.861,0:01:57.025
The food is delicious and Storm,

0:01:57.025,0:01:58.452
Whilst avoiding all meat

0:01:58.452,0:01:59.906
Happily sits and eats

0:01:59.906,0:02:02.439
As the good doctor, slightly pissedly

0:02:02.439,0:02:06.900
Holds court on some anachronistic aspect of medical history

0:02:06.900,0:02:09.637
When Storm suddenly insists

0:02:09.637,0:02:11.309
“But the human body is a mystery!

0:02:11.309,0:02:13.399
Science just falls in a hole

0:02:13.399,0:02:17.247
When it tries to explain the the nature of the soul.”

0:02:17.247,0:02:18.716
My hostess throws me a glance

0:02:18.716,0:02:20.968
She, like my wife, knows there’s a chance

0:02:20.968,0:02:23.894
I’ll be off on one of my rare, but fun, rants

0:02:23.894,0:02:25.496
But I shan't. My lips are sealed.

0:02:25.496,0:02:27.377
I just want to enjoy the meal

0:02:27.377,0:02:29.606
And although Storm is starting to get my goat

0:02:29.606,0:02:31.975
I have no intention of rocking the boat,

0:02:31.975,0:02:33.646
Although it’s becoming a bit of a wrestle

0:02:33.646,0:02:35.597
Because -- like her meteorological namesake -

0:02:35.597,0:02:39.242
Storm has no such concerns for our vessel.

0:02:39.242,0:02:41.007
“Pharmaceutical companies are the enemy

0:02:41.007,0:02:42.842
They promote drug dependency

0:02:42.842,0:02:44.815
At the cost of the natural remedies

0:02:44.815,0:02:46.867
That are all our bodies need

0:02:46.867,0:02:48.530
They are immoral and driven by greed.

0:02:48.530,0:02:49.947
Why take drugs

0:02:49.947,0:02:51.270
When herbs can solve it?

0:02:51.270,0:02:52.571
Why use chemicals

0:02:52.571,0:02:53.825
When homeopathic solvents

0:02:53.825,0:02:54.978
Can resolve it?

0:02:54.978,0:02:56.634
It’s time we all return to live

0:02:56.634,0:02:57.911
With natural medical alternatives.”

0:02:58.065,0:03:00.767
And try as I like,

0:03:00.767,0:03:02.602
A small crack appears

0:03:02.602,0:03:04.474
In my diplomacy-dike.

0:03:05.551,0:03:08.035
“By definition”, I begin

0:03:08.035,0:03:09.870
“Alternative Medicine”, I continue

0:03:09.870,0:03:12.447
“Has either not been proved to work,

0:03:12.447,0:03:15.326
Or been proved not to work.

0:03:15.326,0:03:17.277
Do you know what they call “alternative medicine”

0:03:17.277,0:03:19.413
That’s been proved to work?

0:03:19.413,0:03:21.104
Medicine.”

0:03:21.519,0:03:22.636
“So you don’t believe

0:03:22.636,0:03:23.544
In ANY Natural remedies?”

0:03:23.651,0:03:24.939
“On the contrary, Storm.

0:03:24.939,0:03:26.820
Actually, before we came to tea,

0:03:26.820,0:03:28.447
I took a remedy

0:03:28.447,0:03:30.048
Derived from the bark of a willow tree

0:03:30.048,0:03:32.927
A painkiller that’s virtually side-effect free

0:03:32.927,0:03:34.483
It’s got a weird name,

0:03:34.483,0:03:35.667
Darling, what was it again?

0:03:35.667,0:03:36.758
Masprin?

0:03:36.758,0:03:37.966
Basprin?

0:03:37.966,0:03:39.011
Oh, yes. Asprin!

0:03:39.011,0:03:40.357
Which I paid about a buck for

0:03:40.357,0:03:42.819
Down at the local drugstore.

0:03:42.819,0:03:44.142
The debate briefly abates

0:03:44.142,0:03:45.652
As our hosts collects plates

0:03:45.652,0:03:47.021
but as they return with desserts

0:03:47.021,0:03:48.600
Storm pertly asserts,

0:03:48.600,0:03:50.203
“Shakespeare said it first:

0:03:50.203,0:03:52.385
There are more things in heaven and earth

0:03:52.385,0:03:54.313
Than exist in your philosophy…

0:03:54.313,0:03:57.331
Science is just how we’re trained to look at reality,

0:03:57.331,0:04:00.628
It doesn't explain love or spirituality.

0:04:00.628,0:04:03.066
How does science explain psychics?

0:04:03.066,0:04:05.737
Auras; the afterlife; the power of prayer?”

0:04:05.737,0:04:07.084
I’m becoming aware

0:04:07.084,0:04:08.361
That I’m staring,

0:04:08.361,0:04:10.102
I’m like a rabbit suddenly trapped

0:04:10.102,0:04:13.051
In the blinding headlights of vacuous crap.

0:04:13.051,0:04:15.861
Maybe it’s the Hamlet she just misquothed

0:04:15.861,0:04:18.228
Or the eighth glass of wine I just quaffed

0:04:18.228,0:04:20.365
But my diplomacy dike groans

0:04:20.365,0:04:22.641
And the arsehole held back by its stones

0:04:22.641,0:04:24.283
Can be held back no more:

0:04:24.283,0:04:25.938
“Look , Storm, I don’t mean to bore ya

0:04:25.938,0:04:27.912
But there’s no such thing as an aura!

0:04:27.912,0:04:30.071
Reading Auras is like reading minds

0:04:30.071,0:04:33.647
Or tea-leaves or star-signs or meridian lines

0:04:33.647,0:04:35.273
These people aren’t plying a skill,

0:04:35.273,0:04:37.059
They are either lying or mentally ill.

0:04:37.059,0:04:41.054
Same goes for people who claim they can hear God’s demands

0:04:41.054,0:04:43.943
Or spiritual healers who think they've got magic hands.

0:04:43.943,0:04:44.750
By the way,

0:04:44.750,0:04:45.907
Why do we think it's OK

0:04:45.907,0:04:47.393
For people to pretend they can talk to the dead?

0:04:47.393,0:04:49.901
Isn't that totally fucked in the head?

0:04:49.901,0:04:53.523
Lying to some crying woman whose child has died

0:04:53.523,0:04:55.892
And telling her you’re in touch with the other side?

0:04:55.892,0:04:58.098
I think that’s just fundamentally sick

0:04:58.098,0:05:02.324
Do we need to clarify here that there’s no such thing as a psychic?

0:05:02.324,0:05:03.601
What, are we fucking 2?

0:05:03.601,0:05:06.062
Do we actually think that Horton Heard a Who?

0:05:06.062,0:05:08.825
Do we still believe that Santa brings us gifts?

0:05:08.825,0:05:11.310
That Michael Jackson didn't have face lifts?

0:05:11.310,0:05:13.214
Are we still so stunned by circus tricks

0:05:13.214,0:05:14.886
That we think that the dead would

0:05:14.886,0:05:16.349
Wanna talk to pricks

0:05:16.349,0:05:18.251
Like John Edwards?

0:05:19.205,0:05:21.480
Storm to her credit despite my derision

0:05:21.480,0:05:24.360
Keeps firing off clichés with startling precision

0:05:24.360,0:05:27.216
Like a sniper using bollocks for ammunition

0:05:27.216,0:05:29.839
“You’re so sure of your position

0:05:29.839,0:05:31.697
But you’re just closed-minded

0:05:31.697,0:05:32.788
I think you’ll find

0:05:32.788,0:05:35.064
That your faith in science and tests

0:05:35.064,0:05:36.271
Is just as blind

0:05:36.271,0:05:39.247
As the faith of any fundamentalist”

0:05:39.801,0:05:42.057
“Wow, that’s a good point, let me think for a bit

0:05:42.057,0:05:45.210
Oh wait, my mistake, that’s absolute bullshit.

0:05:46.149,0:05:50.598
Science adjusts it’s views based on what’s observed

0:05:50.598,0:05:55.228
Faith is the denial of observation so that Belief can be preserved.

0:05:55.474,0:05:56.142
If you show me

0:05:56.142,0:05:57.634
That, say, homeopathy works,

0:05:57.634,0:05:59.538
Then I will change my mind

0:05:59.538,0:06:01.767
I’ll spin on a fucking dime

0:06:01.767,0:06:03.392
I’ll be as embarrassed as hell,

0:06:03.392,0:06:05.366
But I will run through the streets yelling

0:06:05.366,0:06:08.431
It’s a miracle! Take physics and bin it!

0:06:08.431,0:06:10.103
Water has memory!

0:06:10.103,0:06:14.050
And while it’s memory of a long lost drop of onion juice is Infinite

0:06:14.050,0:06:16.395
It somehow forgets all the poo it’s had in it!

0:06:16.395,0:06:18.726
You show me that it works and how it works

0:06:18.726,0:06:20.074
And when I’ve recovered from the shock

0:06:20.074,0:06:23.269
I will take a compass and carve Fancy That on the side of my cock.”

0:06:25.377,0:06:27.170
Everyone's just staring now,

0:06:27.170,0:06:29.417
But I’m pretty pissed and I’ve dug this far down,

0:06:29.417,0:06:32.487
So I figure, in for penny, in for a pound:

0:06:32.487,0:06:35.180
“Life is full of mysteries, yeah

0:06:35.180,0:06:37.131
But there are answers out there

0:06:37.131,0:06:38.594
And they won’t be found

0:06:38.594,0:06:40.103
By people sitting around

0:06:40.103,0:06:41.241
Looking serious

0:06:41.241,0:06:42.750
And saying isn’t life mysterious?

0:06:42.750,0:06:44.445
Let’s sit here and hope

0:06:44.445,0:06:45.931
Let’s call up the fucking Pope

0:06:45.931,0:06:47.208
Let’s go watch Oprah

0:06:47.208,0:06:48.903
Interview Deepak Chopra

0:06:48.903,0:06:52.735
If you’re going to watch telly, you should watch Scooby Doo.

0:06:52.735,0:06:54.430
That show was so cool

0:06:54.430,0:06:56.659
because every time there’s a church with a ghoul

0:06:56.659,0:06:58.307
Or a ghost in a school

0:06:58.307,0:07:02.139
They looked beneath the mask and what was inside?

0:07:02.139,0:07:05.353
The fucking janitor or the dude who runs the waterslide.

0:07:05.353,0:07:07.015
Because throughout history

0:07:07.015,0:07:08.989
Every mystery

0:07:08.989,0:07:12.843
Ever solved has turned out to be

0:07:12.843,0:07:15.081
Not Magic.

0:07:15.081,0:07:16.582
Does the idea that there might be knowledge

0:07:16.582,0:07:17.928
Frighten you?

0:07:17.928,0:07:19.647
Does the idea that one afternoon

0:07:19.647,0:07:21.736
On Wiki-fucking-pedia might enlighten you

0:07:21.736,0:07:23.053
Frighten you?

0:07:23.053,0:07:25.266
Does the notion that there may not be a supernatural

0:07:25.266,0:07:26.984
So blow your hippy noodle

0:07:26.984,0:07:29.074
That you would rather just stand in the fog

0:07:29.074,0:07:31.158
Of your inability to Google?

0:07:31.512,0:07:33.643
Isn’t this enough?

0:07:35.351,0:07:39.451
Just this world?

0:07:41.081,0:07:46.653
Just this beautiful, complex

0:07:46.653,0:07:49.935
Wonderfully unfathomable, natural world?

0:07:52.166,0:07:55.196
How does it so fail to hold our attention

0:07:55.196,0:07:57.054
That we have to diminish it with the invention

0:07:57.054,0:08:00.330
Of cheap, man-made Myths and Monsters?

0:08:01.346,0:08:03.114
If you’re so into Shakespeare

0:08:03.114,0:08:05.549
Lend me your ear:

0:08:07.549,0:08:11.938
“To gild refined gold, to paint the lily,

0:08:11.938,0:08:17.650
To throw perfume on the violet… is just fucking silly”

0:08:17.650,0:08:19.810
Or something like that.

0:08:19.810,0:08:21.074
Or what about Satchmo?!

0:08:21.074,0:08:22.712
I see trees of green,

0:08:22.712,0:08:24.895
Red roses too,

0:08:24.895,0:08:26.265
And fine, if you wish to

0:08:26.265,0:08:27.844
Glorify Krishna and Vishnu

0:08:27.844,0:08:29.864
In a post-colonial, condescending

0:08:29.864,0:08:31.907
Bottled-up and labeled kind of way

0:08:31.907,0:08:33.092
Then whatever, that’s ok.

0:08:33.092,0:08:35.929
But here’s what gives me a hard-on:

0:08:36.852,0:08:42.350
I am a tiny, insignificant, ignorant bit of carbon.

0:08:42.350,0:08:45.653
I have one life, and it is short

0:08:45.653,0:08:47.139
And unimportant…

0:08:47.631,0:08:51.110
But thanks to recent scientific advances

0:08:51.110,0:08:57.946
I get to live twice as long as my great great great great uncleses and auntses.

0:08:58.639,0:09:03.161
Twice as long to live this life of mine

0:09:03.161,0:09:06.830
Twice as long to love this wife of mine

0:09:06.830,0:09:11.056
Twice as many years of friends and wine

0:09:11.056,0:09:14.725
Of sharing curries and getting shitty

0:09:14.725,0:09:16.141
With good-looking hippies

0:09:16.141,0:09:17.581
With fairies on their spines

0:09:17.581,0:09:18.858
And butterflies on their titties.

0:09:21.658,0:09:25.894
And if perchance I have offended

0:09:25.894,0:09:29.214
Think but this and all is mended:

0:09:29.214,0:09:31.652
We’d as well be 10 minutes back in time,

0:09:31.652,0:09:34.183
For all the chance you’ll change your mind.

0:09:38.414,0:09:43.233
Written and performed by Tim Minchin

0:09:43.627,0:09:48.115
Directed by DC Turner

0:09:48.115,0:09:50.716
Produced by Tracy King

0:09:50.716,0:09:53.107
Character Design and animation by DC Turner

0:09:53.107,0:09:57.542
Camera & Effects: Ricky Earl, Fraser Davidson, DC Turner, Andrew Flatt

0:09:57.542,0:10:02.650
Supporting Character Animation: Ricky Earl, Kei Phillips, Ash Collins, Valentina Grasso, Betty Le Bon, Fraser Davidson

0:10:02.650,0:10:06.778
Supporting character artwork: Kei Phillips, Ricky Earl, Diego Garcia, Betty Le Bon, Fraiser Davidson, Rachael King, Stuart Mason, Manu Roig

0:10:06.778,0:10:11.683
Sound: Milton Mermikedes, Bridget Merkimedes, Holley Gray, Matthias Simmons, Pete Clements

0:10:11.683,0:10:16.490
Additional Storyboards: Tracy King, Fraser Davidson, Ricky Earl, Joe Pavlo

0:10:16.490,0:10:21.111
With thanks to: Sid Rodrigues, Rebecca Watson, Jane Goldman and family, Chris Blohm, Loretta King, Susan Turner

0:10:21.111,0:10:25.847
With thanks to: Lyndsey Brown, Shella Livingston, Helen Jack, Chris Cox, Tom Milsom, Robin Ince

0:10:25.847,0:10:35.640
© Storm Movie 2011 All Rights Reserved. stormmovie.net, timminchin.com, kershoot.com