2018 12 09 LH EN 11th 12th training of the OI br Pháp Lai

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(Bell)

(Bell)

Good morning

dear Thay dear sangha, Today is the 9th,
Sunday, the 9th of December, 2018.

We are in the Assembly of Stars
meditation hall in Lower Hamlet,

and this is the last of the Dharma talks

before the end of our three month
retreat together .

So I feel a special sense of

speaking to that.

Most of us have been here
for the three month retreat together.

We've been

those of you who came

to Plum Village for three months
have experienced

going through ups and downs.

And maybe,

some of the time you wondered,
'Why did I come?'

I don't know. Excuse me.

It's a loud blow.

(Laughter)

Maybe you felt, 'Yeah, I'd be better off

in a cave somewhere'.

Maybe in the Pole, or somewhere,

in some mountain.

When we practice together,
we really

have to meet each other,

and get along together.

If we don't get along together,

because we are living together 24/7,

it really shows up.
It is difficult to stay calm and to enjoy.

So actually, a lot of the practice that
you've been learning these three months

is how to live in harmony,
how to get along.

How to practice loving speech,

but also you have to communicate
when there is a difficulty,

but with loving speech.

How to let go

of your preference
and maybe of your irritation.

How to see the other person
is also suffering.

Maybe see that

try to understand them
so you can let go of judgment.

And we have practices, like Beginning Anew
that we do regularly.

We do that formally, we sit down

and practice expressing gratitude,
noticing the good things in each other,

and also expressing when we have a regret
towards each other.

It is very renewing practice.

We had - It is also,
we call it the season of Shining Light.

So because we see each other,

we are rooming together, eating together,
working together,

we see each other and we have
something called the sangha eye.

Because, ourselves, if we are just
practising alone,

there is a number of things that we miss
from practising in a community.

One is that because
we are not interacting,

things don't maybe come up
in the same way.

So when we are interacting we get to see
ourselves,

but also we have blind spots.

And so the it's very helpful for us,
for the people we trust,

we open ourselves up,
we allow ourselves to be

open to receiving their view about us.

And that view is expressed
with all of the love and appreciation also

for the whole of us
not just pointing to the difficulty.

So we also practice this
in the three months retreat,

shining light on each other's practice,

in order to help the other person
have more freedom,

more growth in themselves,
and more happiness.

Sometimes it can be a bit scary

to allow ourselves

to have people share like that.

I've known people run away.

But when they allow themselves to
they only experience the love.

I'm sure there are
some exceptions to that.

Sometimes people can get hurt also,
and then we also have compassion

that we are learning the practice.

So living together is
a practice in itself.

And in a sense, it is -

you can say that
learning to live together,

learning to get along is also the fruit
of the practice.

Thay has said, brotherhood, sisterhood,
there is no religion

that is higher than that.

So we are generating
brotherhood and sisterhood.

We are going in that spirit.

There was a Harvard study

done, it was one of the longest ever
studies, 75 years.

It is still going on, I think.

And they interview
and get also self-information

from standardised groups of men
in the States.

Essentially the point is that

they were looking to see
what are the conditions

for happiness and health

looking right through the life.

And what they found was
if you want to know

what makes a happy octogenarian,
that means, if you are 80 years or over,

because these groups they've been
following since they were boys,

and now they are in their 80's.

You look back when they are 50 years old,
which is my age,

you can determine whether

the conditions that seem to be common,

like the ones that are happy,
the ones that are healthy,

the result is only one factor.

It is not how much cholesterol
in the blood,

it is not many things you might think,

but the one factor that comes out

is those people report that they have
good relationships.