Mountain of Stories - a digital story by Nazbah Tom

Nazbah Tom tells the story of how she came out to her Mother. It is a moving story of fear, confusion and love.

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Captions by: the \Radical Access Mapping Project
http://radicalaccessiblecommunities.wordpress.com/

[* SINGING...*]

[* SINGING gradually quietens as the story begins...*]

As I write my coming out letter to my mother

I look out from the window of my dorm room
and see Mount Hesperus.

I ask the mountain for strength
to send this story.

I send the letter.

Three months go by
without a word from my mother.

An elder tells me "*give your mother the same amount of time you gave yourself to accept who you are*".

My mother and I end up having to drive to Paige to run errands
when I come home on break from college.

This is a familiar drive for the both of us.

Usually she is full of stories along this stretch of road.

This drive is silent.

I escape into my head to get away from the void between us.

My thoughts fill with stories
of mountains moving and talking to each other,

skinwalkers running alongside the road,

or that dangerous curve that took someone's life.

My mother clears her throat and I look over.

Suddenly her voice breaks the silence.

She tells me about when she first got the letter.

"*I was disgusted and didn't want to tell anyone.*

*What would people say?*

*I couldn't hold it by myself anymore, so I told your stepdad.*

*And he said to me:*

'We always had people like her in our community.
We have to love and respect her.'

I remember my mother crying, and I felt tears well in my eyes.

Finally she says:

*"That's when I realized I have to love you twice as much,*

*to make up for all the pain you put up with out there."*

She gestures over her head.

She is right, the mountains protect us,

and to go outside of them puts us in harms way.

My mother and I learned this story together.

[spelling?] Nats aan watches us as we follow the black ribbon of highway into Paige.

Together, my mother and I are reminded of the stories

the elders and mountains gave us enough time
to listen to and accept.

*[ SINGING , volume increases and the song continues...]*