El Columpio Ariadna Gil y Coque Malla Director Álvaro Fernández Armero :)

[Beeps.]

[Music.]

Everything is a lie.

I'm sick of cynicism,
of crappy facades,

of edgy tarts
and slobbering bozos.

How simple it would be
to clarify everything.

"Hi. I've been watching you.

I think you have a nice smile,
and a great body.

I'd love to spend the night
with you.

If everything goes well, I could
love you for the rest of my life."

That would be easy.

But no, the opposite always happens.

"Hi.

What's your name?"

"My name is Adela and I'm bitter.

I'm sick of pigs like you.

So if you don't mind,
get lost."

I ask her name, and
for that, I'm a pig.

How disgusting.

Another night sleeping alone.

I'm so sick of it.

On top of that, fat Anna
is stuffing her face.

The worst part is not
sleeping alone,

but waking up with no one
to make me breakfast.

It's very hard to be romantic
and a nympho at the same time.

Self confidence.

That is the key.

Only problem is, finding
the right balance.

I can act self assured,
but will they notice?

Is it a question of sparks?

If it were, that chick
would be burning.

I like watching him.

I could fall in love with him
at one glance.

That cow, Anna, will think it's bullshit.

But, I know that look.

She has no idea.

Why can't you pick up
my vibes?

[Music]

He looks like a teddy bear.

A teddy bear...I would not mind

sleeping with.

Red lips drive me crazy.

Anyway, you will have a
made to order boyfriend,

That's all.

He's pretty attractive.

Seems like a good guy.
Has a good personality.

The personality is crucial.

Would he be good in bed?

She's making my motor run.
Just has to wear a garter belt.

I'm already in love.
I'm infatuated.

Why am I always getting boners?

If she only knew I'm on fire for her.

I can't do this any more.
Come to mama.

What?

If she'd only look at me.

All I have left is masturbation,
or suicide.

Of course, no one facing that
choice picks suicide.

Buddy, why can't you figure it out?
Come closer.

Nevermind, forget it. Forget it.
Don't look, don't look.

The important thing now
is to choose which porno.

Maybe the one about the hooker
with the huge tits.

Pardon, Mr. Teddy Bear.
Got a light?

Missed my chance. Why did I
quit smoking? What a bitch.

Nope, no way.

I love you, although tonight
I go to bed with a hooker.

On top of it all, I'm an idiot.

That bastard, doesn't he have a clue?

How did I become such an asshole?

I'm stupid.

I'm a coward.

Autistic.

Subhuman.

Repressed.

Gay.

Well, that's that.

I'm going to find out.

[Music.]

How horrible. What a shame.

He smells good.

That's what I was missing.
Going away makes things better.

That hair, those eyes, that ass.
That everything.

Come on, come on.

Not talking, not talking.
But what do I say?

I'm cold, I'm cold.
I feel nothing.

Let's see. "How are you?

What's your name?
Where are you going?"

"My name is Mayte, and I want
to take you to the garden."

Since I saw you, you're the only
woman for me.

I love the way you walk.

Do you snore?
I read in bed and wear men's pajamas.

I like cereal for breakfast.

I'm a secretary, but always wanted
to be a ballerina.

I hate people who wear sweats on a Sunday.

All my panties are black. Do you wear
boxers?

Do you know the Big Bang Theory?
- I'm allergic to dogs.

What will we name our son?

[Train whistle.]

[Tense music.]

Shit, I have to go now.

[Tense music.]

[Brakes screech.]

Stay or go?

[Tense music.]

What do I do?

Why doesn't he move?

Follow me, follow me.

[Automatic doors open.]

Don't go. Stay with me.

Come on. Come on.

Boarding?

What are you waiting for?

[Pensive music.]

What else do you want to know?

[Music, increasing.]

[Train whistle.]

My life.

My love!

[Doors slam.]

No!

Nooo!!

[Romantic music.]

I want you. Some day, we'll
start a family.

I will wait for you always, my love.

Forever.

[Romantic music]