The secret of keeping a positive mindset through being told "no" | Dennis Kneale | TEDxFultonStreet

Media Strategist Dennis Kneale — former Managing Editor at Forbes, on-air personality at Fox Business News and CNBC, and writer at Wall Street Journal — knows that pitching media outlets means a lot of rejection. Here he shares his personal method of keeping an optimistic perspective. For three decades, Kneale has been a journalist and media relations strategist.

Formerly with FOX Business Network (FBN) and CNBC, Kneale was previously a managing editor at Forbes Magazine where he most notably covered corporate corruption, including the trials of Martha Stewart, Dennis Kozlowski, Bernie Ebbers. While there, he also oversaw business coverage including the Internet boom, bust and rebuild; corporate scandals and investor fallout; the backlash against the drug industry amid drug recalls and soaring costs; and the rise of Google. Kneale joined Forbes in 1998 to expand its coverage of technology, media and health.

Prior to his role at Forbes, Kneale spent 16 years at The Wall Street Journal where he was a senior editor, directing much of the coverage of new AIDS treatments, which won a Pulitzer Prize in 1997. He started at the Journal in 1982 initially covered advertising, technology and media before becoming an editor in 1990. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at https://www.ted.com/tedx

Today, I want to talk to you
about the idea of thriving on no.

That's pretty much
how I've spent my entire career,

is trying to get past
that negative synonym.

That initial response and being stimulated

by the adventure of trying
to turn no into yes.

Now, if you could be stoked by no
instead of discouraged by it.

If you could be challenged by it,
instead of defeated,

you could get a lot more accomplished
in your life and in your career.

Now, I spent
three decades as a journalist.

I was at the Wall Street journalist,
reporter and a senior editor.

I was the managing editor for Forbes
for a better part of a decade.

I was an anchor at CNBC
and Fox Business Network.

And when you're a journalist,
you're stock and trade is no.

Company's tell you no comment.

Sources say, "No, I won't help you".

Your editor says,
"No, I don't like your story idea".

At the start of my career,
reporter intern of the Detroit News,

well he left the profession
after only one year in it,

and it's because a little old lady
in Albuquerque,

who's doing a nice cute
little story on her,

would not even talk to him for the story.

She was too afraid.

He said, "I don't want to spend
my entire career being told no,"

and I thought, but isn't that the fun part
trying to get to yes?

He didn't think so and so,
he joined big oil as an accountant.

Now, no gets a bum rap in America

because America
is the land of opportunity,

the land of hope,

and yes is a much more
popular thing than no.

No is from the wrong side of the tracks.

In American, we had a popular band
years ago called Yes,

We had that Jim Carrey movie,
Yes Man.

We've got that sports montra
from Marv Albert, Yes.

Yes is such a positive response but no,

no is so negative,
no is just the denial of hope

and all we hope to get done.

No parking, no smoking, no loitering,

no doing any of all of those things,
at the same time, in the same place.

I think it's time to reframe no.

I think that if we can change
the way we look at no,

we could feel better about it
and we can accomplish more.

We could realize that no is nothing more
than a stop on the pathway to yes.

And keep in mind, without no
we would not enjoy yes nearly as much.

(Laughter)

The few times, a few years ago,

I got one of the biggest no's
of my career.

I was at the Fox Business Network,
I was an anchor,

and they decided no,
we don't want to renew your contract,

15 minutes before I was told
to get my briefcase and leave the building.

That's the way they do it these days
when they fire someone.

And I went
to almost every other major network,

saying, "Hey, I am available!" No.

I went to other media outlets,
not in television,

and hey man, I'm coming
back into print. No.

I tried three or four
of the biggest PR firms in the world.

No, no, no, you're no PR guy.

And I just thought,
you're playing with me that's all.

And so, I came up with a book proposal

and my agent got his book proposal
looked at by 16 different publishers,

and every one of them said no.

But you know what? It turns out
no just opens up a way for yes.

Because, I ended up having a book come out
earlier this year,

I teamed up with the world's best
crisis whisperer, Mike Sitrick,

and we wrote a book together.

That is, I assisted him in writing it.

There's a with Dennis Kneale,
biggest by line of my entire career there.

(Laughter)

Now, working with Mike Sitrick
on this book

gave me a two year crash course
in crisis communications,

and taught me enough
to where I could go out on my own.

And in the art of consulting, now,
where I'm out on my own doing this stuff,

I get a lot more no's.

I've learned that consulting
is the art of persuading people

to pay you to give them advice

that they then feel very
empowered to ignore.

So that's alright though,

(Laughter)

as long as they pay the bills, right?

Now, so that was a good thing
and that's given me a new lease on life.

Now, if you're the founder of a startup,
you're accustomed to a lot of no's too.

You try to raise money
and they tell you no.

You try to tell your story to the media
and reporters tell you no.

Now, I could tell you
how to go about turning that no into yes.

I could tell you how you emphasize
three key aspects of every good story

and that is conflict,
drama, and struggle.

I could tell you
how you have to wrap yourself in a problem

that became your obsession to solve,

and that that become your company
and that's what you sell.

I could tell about the small man,
big picture technique

to give your story national significance.

I could tell you all of those things,

but then I'd have to charge you
$600 an hour.

So instead, I leave you with this.

The trick is to realize that no
simply is one more step on the way to yes.

And so that, we have to realize
that when we see a big fat no sitting there,

you can zoom out in the distance,

kind of look at it in a different way

and realize that that's not no,
that's not no at all.

That's just the start of not yet.

(Laughter)

Thank you very much!

(Applause)