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2 Hot Transexuals Finally Give Some Answers!

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    [MUSIC: Sunglasses At Night by Corey Hart...]
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    If I was born into the right body
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    that was just the like most like useless airquotes ever
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    If I was born into the "right" body.
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    I would probably either be a trans man
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    or like a lesbian separatist.
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    I would probably live like in the woods
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    worship the mother goddess
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    and invent little guillotines to cut off penises
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    that's probably what I would do.
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    Um, I sort of like being trans.
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    Uh.
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    Do you mean into a body that might get me laid more?
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    I kind of like my body.
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    I don't think I understand this question.
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    What if YOU were born into the right body?
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    My real name is John Denver.
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    Um, well, it's actually funny um it's funny that you ask that
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    I was actually raised by wolves,
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    and so my real name, my like given name is really hard to pronounce, um, in English.
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    [MAKING WOLF SOUNDS:]
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    whoooooowoowowhoooooo...
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    It roughly translates as Shadow of the Wind, um
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    and I don't really know why that was an appropriate name for me.
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    My real name is John Tesh.
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    They're wolves. Everything's "the wind" something
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    I don't know, have you had surgery yet?
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    Not trying to be mean here, but, it wouldn't hurt you.
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    In this area.
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    That's all I'm saying.
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    I don't actually talk about this with a lot of people cuz it's kind of uncomfortable.
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    When I was 13, um, sorry, this is really hard...
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    Yes, actually I have had surgery.
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    I had surgery right after I bought a yacht
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    and some um Faberge eggs
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    which are not very tasty.
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    I got this surgery because I had this really bad ingrown toenail
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    it was really nasty, it was pusy and green, it was really embarrassing
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    it was disgusting
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    I had to go to a podiatrist, they had to drain all of this shit out of it
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    the green yellow nasty stuff
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    Um but yeah, I had surgery and then I bought a house and, um,
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    well, a mansion, and I bought a baseball team.
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    They're not doing very well.
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    I guess I need to start talking about it, right?
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    Cause I just feel that it's really dishonest of me to hide things from you
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    because everyone deserves to know about these things.
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    But yeah, I've had surgery, all kinds of surgery.
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    I had um a new index finger installed
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    it's made out of granite. It's hard to bend.
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    I actually signed a legal document saying that I would never reveal my real voice again.
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    One of the benefits and one of the problems with being a trans woman
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    is that going on hormones doesn't actually like change your voice.
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    So for here it actually helps though
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    because I can get my voice back down to kind of the register it was at before I transitioned
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    [CLEARS THROAT]
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    So, let me just, let me just prepare for a second.
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    [IN A LOWER, MECHANICAL-SOUNDING VOICE]
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    It sounded a lot like this.
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    Um, it sounded just like the devil, um
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    and actually uh actually I was the devil for a little bit
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    Um, and then I realized that I was really uncomfortable with myself
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    and I needed to be true to myself
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    and I realized that I was just a woman trapped in a demon's body.
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    My real voice is so sexy, so hot, that one day I was at home
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    and this big black van with no windows pulled up out front,
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    six people got out with like suits and dark sunglasses and all
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    and they came into the house
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    and they uh put a bag over my head
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    and put me out in the van and drove away
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    and I actually had to go to this government vocal retraining program
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    Apparently there was about to be an economic collapse in the US
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    because my voice was so sexy that nobody could get anything done.
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    No.
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    Yes.
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    Well, I have a cunt
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    so that makes me a man.
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    Yes I am.
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    No, definitely, definitely, definitely no. 100%
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    Yes. Yes, I'm definitely one of those.
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    Depending on who's talking.
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    I'm going to go with option C.
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    Yes, I am.
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    I think.
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    Oh my gaaaaawwwd. I'm sorry!
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    Come here
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    Let's talk.
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    Let's talk about it.
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    Ohhhh. You're having a hard time?
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    This might make you feel better.
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    Here, lemme, lemme hold you.
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    Yeah, just a little bit closer
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    Now I feel bad.
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    Pronouns!
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    Yeah!
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    Who's yer pronoun!
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    I had a really traumatic childhood, um
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    [BREATHES OUT HEAVILY]
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    Um, it's actually really hard for me to talk about.
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    My stepmother used to make me
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    mow the lawn.
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    So, so when I was a kid
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    I had really bad acne, really bad skin,
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    it was really really hard.
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    And I think I just didn't want to deal with my acne
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    and finally it was like
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    "Alright! I'm trans! I'm trans. I have acne and I'm trans!"
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    And I would have to use like a leaf blower and blow off the driveway
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    [BREATHES OUT HEAVILY]
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    Once I sort of like dealt with the whole acne/trans thing
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    things got like easier and my skin cleared up
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    but I've actually recently had -no thanks to Julie Blair- but sort of I've broken out again
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    But here's the thing
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    I'm not trans anymore.
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    The event that really sealed it for me
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    really made me realize that I was trans was
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    we had to lay down mulch once
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    and, yknow it was like 300 pounds of mulch
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    and it took all day
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    and it was really sweaty and dirty and grose and we didn't get paid
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    and, it was just horrible
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    and my sisters spent all day
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    eating bonbons and watching Lifetime
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    And that's when I realized that was the life I wanted.
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    And that's when I realized I wanted to be a girl.
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    I was raised in the church, Catholic,
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    and we were always tought to you know
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    we should be giving to each other,
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    we should be giving back to the world
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    and I decided that I wanted to donate parts of my body to the world.
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    Especially information about my body to the world. Yeah.
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    For my whole life, um, I've just felt really uncomforable with
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    how few tentacles I've had.
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    I've always felt like I should have been born with more tentacles.
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    My titties are an offering to mankind
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    Which actually translates into a direct ticket to heaven.
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    The Catholic church is actually thinking about making me a saint for just, for martyring myself.
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    Unfortunately you know modern science has only come so far
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    so I figured that physically transitioning was the next best thing to being
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    a beautiful, majestic octopus, swimming the seven seas, inking things that attacked me.
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    Actually, every time I'm in bed with somebody
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    I can only think two words
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    they just run through my head over and over and over again
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    and those words are
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    pity fuck
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    [Sunglasses At Night by Corey Hart...]
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    [LAUGHING and UNCLEAR...]
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    Fuck you.
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    [MORE WOLF SOUNDS]
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    [LAUGHING AND UNCLEAR...]
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    Cunt. Man. Mancunt? Man cu..., cunt man.
Title:
2 Hot Transexuals Finally Give Some Answers!
Description:

Has someone ever asked you a question that feels invasive? Has a complete stranger ever made assumptions about your life? Do people tell you that your name and pronouns puts a strain on their lives? Red and Charles answer some of these challenging questions!

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Video Language:
English
Duration:
08:53
Radical Access Mapping Project edited English subtitles for 2 Hot Transexuals Finally Give Some Answers!
Radical Access Mapping Project edited English subtitles for 2 Hot Transexuals Finally Give Some Answers!

English subtitles

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