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Why is it So Hard to Forgive Ourselves? [CC English & Español] | Kati Morton

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Forgiveness is something we often know we should do or we are told to do it, but no one really talks about how we are supposed to forgive someone, especially ourselves. When anyone speaks about forgiveness, I know I automatically think about someone doing something that hurt me or my feelings and that I need to let that go by forgiving them. But I find that what we struggle with most is forgiving ourselves for any wrongs or missteps. And trust me, I am not any better at this! Just the other day I was ruminating about something I said that I worried could have been taken the wrong way, or sometimes if I let my mind wander I will go back to things I have done in my past that I feel bad about. I can even spend hours just going through things I said or did in my past, jumping from when I was a child to a few months ago. I will play it back again almost like I am trying to hurt myself all over again to prove just how sorry I am. But onto the good news!! Today we are both going to learn how we can forgive ourselves and finally let all that stuff go!
1. Allow yourself a re-do.
2. Say sorry, and repair the relationship
3. Thought stop
4. Focus on how far you have come.
5. Positive self talk.
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When anyone speaks about forgiveness, I know I automatically think about someone doing something that hurt me or my feelings and that I need to let that go by forgiving them. But I find that what we struggle with most is forgiving ourselves for any wrongs or missteps. And trust me, I am not any better at this! Just the other day I was ruminating about something I said that I worried could have been taken the wrong way, or sometimes if I let my mind wander I will go back to things I have done in my past that I feel bad about. I can even spend hours just going through things I said or did in my past, jumping from when I was a child to a few months ago. But here's what we can do to start forgiving ourselves:
1. Allow yourself a re-do. Doing this not only shows us that we have learned and moved on, but that we WILL do better next time. Give it a try. It really can help.
2. Say sorry, and repair the relationship. Often when we haven’t at least tried to make amends we can struggle to forgive ourselves and move on.
3. Thought stop! I haven’t talked about this for a while, but it’s SUCH an important tool!!
4. Focus on how far you have come. Right now let’s take some time to consider our own values, morals, and relationships. What are the things you look for in others and what do you strive to bring to your relationships? Taking the time to consider these things can help us not only realize that we are a good person, but also that we may have learned a lot from that past upset.
5. Positive self talk. If we keep allowing our mind to take us back to that fight, and then we beat ourselves up again and again about how we should have not said that, or we should have said this instead, we won’t ever be able to move past it. If we change the conversation we have with ourselves about this hurt and terrible or embarrassing experience then and only then can we fully let go of it and forgive ourselves. Try ​BetterHelp:​ http://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
Plans​ ​start​ ​at​ ​$35​ ​a​ ​week​ ​(billed​ ​monthly).​ ​Must​ ​be​ ​18+​ ​to​ ​sign up.Please help transcribe and/or translate this video!
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I have a new tool to help you journal & stay motivated. Getting started on our path to self-care can be hard and sometimes sticking with it can be even more difficult. That’s why I created this tool! I send you messages twice a week to help get you thinking and writing more easily & take your journaling in a new and helpful direction.I'm Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos!CONTACT
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1223 Wilshire Blvd.
Santa Monica, CA 90403