From war to peace: a student's journey

When Staecey Merveille Ngabire fled her war-torn country to pursue a safer life as a refugee in Canada, she wasn't sure how she'd adapt. In this resolute Talk, Staecey shares how self-determination helped her cultivate a new life without losing touch with her Burundian roots. For Staecey, the key was finding the courage to take a chance. "I decided that learning how to become the person that I wanted to be was far more important than my fear that I might fail."

I still remember it like it
was yesterday,

the day that was filled with darkness
as sparks spread in the atmosphere,

while my ears were broken by the
sounds of guns and bombs.

That was my memorable day
in July 2007,

when I first stepped foot on a plane
to flee my country, Burundi,

in search of a secure place that would
become my new home.

As I look back,

I knew that I was leaving behind a part of
me that I would never forget;

However, as I looked ahead of me,

I knew that I was going to reach the
place that I had dreamed of.

I was born in a densely populated
country named Burundi,

which is also deeply affected by poverty.

Looking back, my family and I
were fortunate

to have shelter, food and education.

In my country, less than 5% of the
population has electricity,

which means most Burundians live and work

with the natural movement
of the light from the sun.

My family and I lived in a civilized area
in Burundi’s capital called Bujumbura.

My three sisters and I had the privilege
to attend a Catholic school

and get a proper education.

Growing up,

I wondered why our house
and our neighbor’s houses

were gated with cement walls?

Why did we all need to have closed gates?

I wondered why my parents never let
my sisters and I play outside those walls?

I asked myself: why did we all need to
have different last names,

even though we were family?

I asked why we had to turn off all
the lights during the night

when we heard gunshots.

Then afterwards, hide under kitchen tables
and hear the cries and the screams

of people outside in the midst
of the darkness.

It is true to presume that my native
country was never a safe place.

We constantly lived in fear of being
attacked on our way to school,

at home or in the middle of the night.

When the airplane engine started,
my back got stuck to the chair,

I took a deep breath, my hand squeezed
my father’s arm tight,

I looked around and saw my mom
strong and courageous

telling my sisters and I not to be afraid
of what was ahead.

Instead, to remain faithful and
optimistic for what the future held.

Living in Canada gave my family
and I peace of mind and heart.

Among my first impressions of local life
as an 8-year-old in 2007

was the sight of children enjoying the
simple freedom of playing outside.

However, starting a new life was
not easy for me.

It was like returning back to crawling and
learning how to say my first word.

At times, I was very confused.

But it took a lot of self-discipline
not to get frustrated or discouraged.

But even as a young child,
I knew that I had to take risks.

Sometimes those risks were worth it
and sometimes they were not,

but in life you never know
until you have tried.

Throughout all these challenges,

when I first had to adapt to the
different time zones,

I also had to learn how to communicate

with the children in our
neighborhood in English,

since I only knew French and Kirundi.

At school, I had to step out of my comfort
zone and make friends during recess.

Fellow classmates would often come
to me and ask me questions

of my life back in Africa, Burundi.

Questions such as: do you have schools?
Internet? Computers and ‘‘a real house’’?

Did you have to wake up
early to attend school,

how many students were in your class?

They asked so many more questions.
But, I had questions of my own.

For example:

what does snow feel like?

What is Tim Hortons for Canadians?

And how does it feel to wake up every
morning knowing that you are safe

going to and coming back from school?

See, I never got to ask those questions

because I was too busy
answering my classmates.

This sometimes got me frustrated and
at times, I wished it would end.

But I told myself In the end, that they
were just trying to understand who I was

and make a correlation with
their own world.

Throughout all of these challenges,

my parents always reminded me of a quote
by Meg Cabot, an American author.

She states that:

‘‘Courage is not the absence of fear
but rather the judgement

that something else is more important
than fear.’’

In life, I decided that learning how to
become the person that I wanted to be,

even in this new world, was far more
important than my fear that I might fail.

I strived, and I told myself never to give up.

I often visualize the image of a
large rock.

And on that rock are cracks in
many different directions.

But what does the rock have? The rock
still remains strong and unified.

I sometimes feel like that. Fragmented.

Because a part of me still has family
back in Burundi, Africa,

yet my new life is in Canada.

Each one of you, is on a journey.

For me, my work has not ended yet.
I still have work to do.

For the many years to come, I aspire to
finish my civil engineering degree,

and get experience in Canada
and across the world.

But my ultimate goal in life is to apply
those skills and knowledges to communities

and developing countries,
including my native country Burundi.

I will strive to achieve my best because
throughout all my journey,

I want to give back to my Canadian
community,

for giving me a safe place to learn,
to grow and to advance.

Throughout all these challenges, I learned
to continue pursuing my goals.

And I always remind myself of
the power of self-determination.

See, self-determination is a combination
of skills, knowledge and beliefs

that enables a person to
work towards a goal.

It starts with positivity and optimism.

And yes, I am that person who
always encourages

my fellow classmates, colleagues
and friends

to always remain faithful,
cheerful and confident.

To always look at the bright
side in any situation.

In life, you must make a choice to take
a chance or you life will never change.

Each one of you is on a journey,

and there will come times in life when you
will have to take risks,

face challenges and struggles.

But It is in those moments that you must
make a choice to be self-determined.

You are the author of your own
story. On your own journey.

Have purpose, take risks, and ultimately,
stay focused on your goals.

Thank you.