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← Biblical Counsel to Walk in Sexual Purity - Jesse Barrington

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Showing Revision 2 created 05/22/2018 by illbehonest.

  1. As you counsel people on
    the topic of sexual purity,
  2. what advice do you find yourself giving
  3. time and time again to help believers
  4. walk in purity?
  5. Jesse: One of the areas I begin with
  6. in talking about sexual purity
  7. is in the area of understanding
  8. the depth of the gospel
  9. and the blood of Christ to forgive
  10. even in the area of sexual impurity.
  11. So often, I see so many people
  12. who struggle in this area
  13. and are convinced -
  14. I cannot come back to God;
  15. I can't come back to Christ
  16. because I've done this this many times.
  17. And often, I'll bring them to
    David's psalm of confession.
  18. In verse 1, David says,
  19. "Have mercy on me, O God,
  20. according to Your steadfast love."
  21. And I'll just sit there
    with people sometimes
  22. and go over that again and again.
  23. You have to believe that
    God is able to forgive,
  24. but you have to believe
    that He's willing to forgive.
  25. And we have to remember the basis
  26. of His forgiveness.
  27. It is not our performance.
  28. So when a brother or a sister struggle
  29. in the area of sexual purity,
  30. so often I see them
    trying to earn their way
  31. back into a right standing with God.
  32. Whether it's: I've got to be
    more committed next time.
  33. Or, my repentance needs
    to be more perfect.
  34. And I remind them you have to understand
  35. the basis of God's mercy is His love.
  36. And the basis of God's
    love is not performance.
  37. And I'm not saying God's indifferent
  38. to our repentance
  39. or continuing in sin
    that grace may abound.
  40. But I see men and women
  41. that have genuine marks of conversion
  42. struggle in this area.
  43. And when they do sin,
  44. we'll spend sometimes days or weeks
  45. laying around, if you will,
    in the guilt of the sin.
  46. There needs to be an urgency
  47. of coming back to God
  48. believing that in Christ,
    if they confess their sins,
  49. He's faithful and just to forgive them
  50. and cleanse them from all unrighteousness.
  51. In regards to proactively here -
  52. I think there's a proactive
    and a reactive sense
  53. of how we guard against sexual impurity.
  54. I think of the verse "Flee youthful lust."
  55. So, I'll say to the men sometimes,
  56. "Hey, flee youthful lusts.
  57. There's one way you can
    guard against sexual impurity.
  58. And they'll say,
    "Amen. Flee youthful lust."
  59. But I'll say, "What's
    the rest of the verse?"
  60. In fact, we were in a men's meeting once
  61. on the topic of sexual purity,
  62. and I stood up and I said,
    "Flee youthful lusts."
  63. And they all said, "Amen!"
  64. And I say, "Men, what's the
    second half of the verse?"
  65. Pursue.
  66. In other words, there is a putting off.
  67. There is a guarding of the heart
  68. where we do flee.
  69. We obey Proverbs 7.
  70. We don't go on the corner.
  71. We don't tempt ourselves to be tempted.
  72. We guard those things.
  73. We run from those things.
  74. But there's the other side of the battle
  75. against sexual impurity,
  76. which is the pursuing.
  77. It is looking. It is the
    putting on of Christ.
  78. Inevitably, James, what I find
  79. in these areas when people have given in
  80. to sexual temptation,
  81. is that they've stopped nurturing
  82. and nourishing their soul;
  83. the guarding of their heart;
  84. the reading of the Word;
    the meditation of the Word.
  85. As the old saying goes,
  86. the Word keeps you from sin,
    and sin keeps you from the Word.
  87. And the majority of time I find is
  88. they're trying to practice
  89. the guarding of things,
  90. but they're not fulfilling the pursuing
  91. of righteousness, love, and Christ.
  92. And if your heart is not satisfied
  93. in treasuring and savoring Jesus Christ,
  94. it will look somewhere else to worship.
  95. So it's not just
    putting off; it's putting on.
  96. Question: When someone comes to you,

  97. how do you discern,
  98. is this a true Christian who's struggling
  99. or is this someone who is lost?
  100. Or how necessary is it
    to even discern that?
  101. Jesse: I look where their struggle is

  102. regarding their sin.
  103. In other words, is it a godly sorrow?
  104. Remember Paul in Corinthians speaks about
  105. a worldly sorrow versus a godly sorrow.
  106. The worldly sorrow -
  107. you can take an atheist who's caught
  108. with pornography.
  109. There's embarrassment. There's shame.
  110. There's guilt.
  111. What is my wife going to say?
    What are my kids going to say?
  112. What are my co-workers going to think?
  113. Well, that's not godly sorrow.
  114. Now the genuine Christian
  115. will think those same thoughts,
  116. but they will have a Godward sorrow
  117. regarding their sin.
  118. And so I'm looking at where is
  119. the sorrow for sin?
  120. Is it merely for the embarrassment
  121. of what they've just done?
  122. Or is it a Godward -
  123. "Against You and You only
    have I sinned, O God,
  124. and done what is evil in Your sight."
  125. And so I think regeneration produces
  126. a love for God, a reverence for God,
  127. an affection for God and His glory.
  128. And so when we sin, we are sorrowful
  129. not only for what we have done
  130. and how we'll look before others,
  131. but we're sorrowful for
    what we've done to God;
  132. the robbing of His glory,
  133. and against Him have we sinned.
  134. So that's an indicator.
  135. Where the trajectory of
    their sin and their sorrow?
  136. To view more resources
    on overcoming sexual sin
  137. visit illbehonest.com,
  138. go to Topics and select "sexual sin."