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Kati, do you have any advice on expressing/releasing anger? It’s an emotion i never learnt to express; it wasn’t modeled in a healthy way for me growing up, & it’s completely destroying me & my relationships & i feel terrified.
Now just so you know, anger is the most commonly avoided emotion. It’s really a tie between anger and any kind of sadness or vulnerability. Mainly because these emotions can leave us feeling out of control or possibly open to even more hurt.
1. Emotion collages: these are a bit easier to start because they don’t require us to know exactly how we feel or how to express it. All that this requires is that we think about our anger. If anger itself is too much, maybe start with a less charged emotion like irritated or upset. You can color it, cut out pieces of magazine or newspaper, write out words, phrases or even quotes that you feel express that emotion.
2. Physical activity: This could be kicking or throwing a ball into a wall or net, yoga or even kickboxing. Whatever you are able to do that physically expresses the anger you feel, do it!
3. Journaling: This is a personal fav of mine because it helps for me to actually write out by hand how angry I am at someone or a situation and then tear it up. This can also be a great way to learn about yourself and your experience with anger.
4. Find ways to calm your system down. When we have stuffed anger for a really long time that usually means we struggle with anxiety and overall tension as a result. Many of my patients have even have blood pressure issues because of their inability to express anger healthily.
5. Finally learn to lean into your anger and be curious about it. Anger serves to protect us, so what are we so afraid of? The less we shy away from our anger, the less out of control it will feel. So feel it, ask it questions, figure out what caused it or where it’s coming from, and overall become friends with it. Try BetterHelp: http://tryonlinetherapy.com/katimorton
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