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CHRISTMAS APOCALYPSE

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    (sarcastically) I love when they start
    playing Christmas music in October.
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    Shut up!
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    Man, it's been great having such
    a nice and peaceful Christmas this year.
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    Yep, totally uneventful.
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    Yeah.
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    - Yeah.
    - Yeah.
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    (sighs) I mean, I guess I miss
    our crazy adventures a little bit.
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    Yeah, they could have done
    with a little bit more violence.
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    Yeah, maybe a little bit more nudity.
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    Yeah, I should take my pants off.
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    No, dude! What's- why-
    what's wrong with you?!
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    Keep those on!
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    Okay, I'm sorry.
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    It's just that this year's Christmas
    has just been so boring.
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    (sighs) Yeah.
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    If only today were more like
    an animated Christmas special
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    or something, then we'd have
    a crazy awesome adventure for sure!
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    Yeah... You know what?
    That sounds like a job for our...
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    (Together) Imaginations!
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    Holy Betty White's ballsack!
    It worked!
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    Aw yeah! Now that
    we're animated, anything goes!
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    Check it out, I can fly!
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    - (thump)
    - (Anthony groans)
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    (muffled) Dammit. I guess that's not how
    it works in this animation.
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    It's all good, man.
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    I'm sure something crazy exciting is
    about to happen, any second now.
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    (knocking)
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    Aha! See!
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    Told you, somebody knocked on the door.
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    That's f**king exciting.
    Let's run to it!
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    (panting, laughter)
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    Oh god, I hope it's Ian's mom
    with no clothes on!
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    Hey guys, Merry Christmas!
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    (Ian) Eeh, no...
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    Ugh, f**king Stevie, seriously?
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    (Stevie) Guys, you know I saw you,
    and can still hear you, right?
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    Come on, let me in!
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    I'm freezing my holly jolly
    butthole out here!
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    Shut the hell up, Stevie!
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    Wait a second...
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    Did you see the size
    of that big-ass present?
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    Yeah, you think it was for us?
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    I mean obviously it's for us.
    He doesn't have any other friends.
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    Yeah.. I feel kinda bad, 'cause we didn't
    even get him anything.
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    Yeah, you know sometimes I pretend
    that he doesn't even exist.
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    - Yeah, just like your herpes.
    - What?
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    (Stevie) Guys, seriously?
    I can still hear you!
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    If we want that gift, I guess we're going
    to have to get him a gift too.
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    We need to get Stevie a present!
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    Yeah, but dude, it's Christmas Day.
    All the stores are closed.
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    F**cking lazy-ass union workers!
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    I know, get back to your job, idiots!
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    If we wanna get
    whatever's inside Stevie's box,
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    we're gonna need a Christmas miracle.
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    That sounds really wrong,
    but I'm gonna try something.
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    Oh great scary, omniscient Gods
    of the holiday season,
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    we implore you!
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    Please bring us
    a present to give to Stevie
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    so that we may avoid the social
    awkwardness and embarrassment!
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    Raaar!
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    I am a yeti, here to deliver
    your Christmas wish!
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    Ahh! Big-ass furry
    naked thing covered in fur!
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    Kill it, kill it!
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    Dude, no!
    He's here to help us!
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    Right you are.
    Here, give this gift to your pal, Stacey.
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    (muffled) My name is Stevie!
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    Wow! Thanks furry naked guy covered in fur!
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    Holy Santa's f**kballs, this is amazing!
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    Raaar! I am a yeti!
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    Now our house looks like a pride parade.
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    Yeah, we'd appreciate it if you didn't
    make our floor look like Kesha's butthole.
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    Dude, don't freak out.
    That's why we got the Roomba.
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    It works perfectly fine!
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    (crashing)
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    Raaar! Not this stuff!
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    It's the kind of glittery confetti
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    that really gets stuck
    good and deep into the rug!
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    You'll be finding little pieces
    of it in there for weeks!
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    Ra-aar!
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    (sarcastically) Oh, that's.. great.
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    (sarcastically) Super.
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    Hey, guys! I've lost all feeling
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    in my hands, feet, and testicles.
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    Sh-Should I be worried?
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    Raaar. Why don't you let
    your pal Stanley in,
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    and give him his present?
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    Hell yeah! He's gonna love this!
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    Thanks guys!
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    I was always totally 70 percent sure
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    you wouldn't let me die
    of hypothermia out there! (Laughs)
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    Of course not, Stevie!
    Now here's your gift.
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    Which we put tons of thought and care
    into and purchased way in advance.
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    A present for me?!
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    Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!
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    (rumbling)
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    (laughing)
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    Ahh!
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    What the fudge-covered
    Jesus is that thing?!
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    Oh my gosh, he's adorable!
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    I'm really gonna enjoy eating him alive!
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    Get your f**king hands off me, fatty!
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    Death to all!
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    (glass shatters)
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    May the blood of the living rain
    down for eons to come!
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    You know there's something about
    that gingerbread man I just don't like.
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    Specifically the stuff about the blood of the living
    raining down for eons to come.
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    I mean, he didn't even get my name right.
    It's Ian, not Eon!
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    And why does he want me to come?
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    I've got a very bad feeling about this...
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    It's okay, guys!
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    I'm just happy you got
    me a present this year!
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    (gasps) Ooh. Wanna play charades?
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    (car alarm, laughing)
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    (laughing)
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    Dude, seriously!
    What the hell is your deal?
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    Raaar! You dumbasses!
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    Didn't you know you should
    never trust a yeti at Christmas!
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    We can't stand
    all the joyfulness and cheers!
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    Ho-ho-hold on.
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    Don't you dare knock on Cheers!
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    Ted Danson is the sh*t!
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    Oh god, what's that thing doing now?
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    (flames crackle)
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    He's infecting all the other cookies!
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    They're gonna kill us all!
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    But they're so cute!
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    Yeah, you are all totally boned.
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    Mind if I ride out this wave
    of gingerbread zombies on your couch?
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    (sighs)
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    (channel changing)
    Nope, nope, seen it, nope.
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    (Porn moans) Ooh. I see you guys
    subscribe to all the channels!
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    - (porn star) Mmm. You get dat, girl.
    - (woman moans)
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    Seen it.
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    Alright! Here we go!
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    When picnics go wrong!
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    This show's my jam.
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    (maniacal laughing, car alarms)
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    Merry Christmas, bitches!
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    Die slowly!
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    You know, I feel
    partially responsible for this.
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    And I'm starting to think
    that yeti is a total d-bag.
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    (TV) I say Judy,
    these sandwiches are delicious.
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    - (monster roaring)
    - Ahh! He's eating my face!
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    (laughing)
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    It's funny, because they're all hideously
    disfigured! Hahaha!
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    - Anthony, what the hell are we going to do?
    - (sirens outside)
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    I don't know, but we've gotta act fast.
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    It's not like we've got
    a whole week to think of a plan.
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    ♪ (Christmas music) ♪
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    Oh my god, a cliffhanger!
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    While you're waiting for part 2,
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    click the video on the right to watch
    another animation by the same people
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    that helped make this episode.
    It's called Alfred and Poe
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    and it's hilarious,
    I promise, click it.
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    My weapon of choice is the crossbow.
    Choose yours!
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    - (screaming)
    - Whoops, oh god..
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    And click the video on the left to see
    behind-the-scenes from this episode,
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    and watch us tell you
    our top five Christmas movies.
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    And we try to sing some Christmas carols.
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    And we're really, really, really good at it.
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    ♪ Up on the rooftop, click, click, click ♪
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    ♪ Down with Santa, suck your d**ck ♪
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    Oh.
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    Click subscribe if you don't want me
    to freeze my holly jolly butthole off!
Title:
CHRISTMAS APOCALYPSE
Description:
more » « less
Video Language:
English
Team:
Captions Requested
Duration:
07:04

English subtitles

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