How you can use impostor syndrome to your benefit
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0:01 - 0:05So I've experienced
a lot of success in my life. -
0:06 - 0:08Over a decade ago,
-
0:08 - 0:11I started a business straight out of uni
with my mate, Scott. -
0:12 - 0:15Now, having no prior business experience
-
0:15 - 0:17and not really any grand plan --
-
0:17 - 0:21in fact, our goals when we started were
not to have to get a real job -
0:21 - 0:22(Laughter)
-
0:22 - 0:24and to not have to wear
a suit to work every day. -
0:24 - 0:26Check and check.
-
0:26 - 0:27(Laughter)
-
0:28 - 0:32Today, we have thousands
of amazing employees, -
0:32 - 0:35and millions of people use
our software around the planet. -
0:35 - 0:37And technically, even outside the planet,
-
0:37 - 0:40if you count those that are currently
on their way to Mars. -
0:40 - 0:43So you'd think that I know
what I'm doing every day -
0:43 - 0:44when I go to work.
-
0:45 - 0:47Well, let me let you in on something:
-
0:47 - 0:52most days, I still feel like
I often don't know what I'm doing. -
0:53 - 0:55I've felt that way for 15 years,
-
0:55 - 0:59and I've since learned that feeling
is called "impostor syndrome." -
1:01 - 1:04Have you ever felt out of your depth,
-
1:04 - 1:05like a fraud,
-
1:06 - 1:10and just kind of guessed/bullshitted
your way through the situation -- -
1:10 - 1:11(Laughter)
-
1:11 - 1:13petrified that anytime,
-
1:13 - 1:15someone was going to call you on it?
-
1:16 - 1:19Well, I can think of many examples
where I felt like this. -
1:20 - 1:22Interviewing our first HR manager,
-
1:22 - 1:25having never worked in a company
that had an HR department -- -
1:25 - 1:26(Laughter)
-
1:26 - 1:29terrified as I walked into the interview,
-
1:29 - 1:32thinking, "What am I going
to ask this person?" -
1:32 - 1:35Or attending board meetings
in a T-shirt surrounded by suits, -
1:35 - 1:37and acronyms are flying around,
-
1:37 - 1:39feeling like a five-year-old
-
1:39 - 1:41as I surreptitiously write
them down in my notebook, -
1:41 - 1:44so I can look them up on Wikipedia
when I get home later. -
1:44 - 1:45(Laughter)
-
1:45 - 1:47Or, in the early days,
-
1:47 - 1:49when people would call up
and ask for accounts payable, -
1:49 - 1:53I would freeze and think, "Wait,
are they asking for money -
1:53 - 1:55or giving it to us?"
-
1:55 - 1:57(Laughter)
-
1:57 - 2:00And I would cover the phone,
-
2:00 - 2:02cover the mouthpiece of the phone,
-
2:02 - 2:04and say, "Scott, you're in accounts,"
-
2:04 - 2:05and pass it across.
-
2:05 - 2:06(Laughter)
-
2:06 - 2:09We both did a lot of jobs back then.
-
2:09 - 2:14So for me, impostor syndrome is a feeling
of being well, well out of your depth, -
2:14 - 2:17yet already entrenched in the situation.
-
2:17 - 2:21Internally, you know you're not
skilled enough, experienced enough -
2:21 - 2:24or qualified enough
to justify being there, -
2:24 - 2:25yet you are there,
-
2:25 - 2:27and you have to figure a way out,
-
2:27 - 2:29because you can't just get out.
-
2:30 - 2:32It's not a fear of failure,
-
2:32 - 2:34and it's not a fear
of being unable to do it. -
2:35 - 2:38It's more a sensation
of getting away with something, -
2:38 - 2:41a fear of being discovered,
-
2:41 - 2:44that at any time, someone
is going to figure this out. -
2:44 - 2:45And if they did figure it out,
-
2:45 - 2:48you'd honestly think, "Well,
that's fair enough, actually." -
2:48 - 2:50(Laughter)
-
2:50 - 2:54One of my favorite writers,
Neil Gaiman, put it so beautifully -
2:54 - 2:58in a commencement address he gave
at a university, called "Make Good Art." -
2:58 - 3:00I want to make sure
I get his quote correct. -
3:01 - 3:04"I was convinced that there would be
a knock on the door, -
3:04 - 3:08and a man with a clipboard would be there
to tell me that it was all over, -
3:09 - 3:11that they'd caught up with me,
-
3:11 - 3:13and that I would now have to go
and get a real job." -
3:14 - 3:17Now, when there's a knock on my door,
-
3:17 - 3:22I still feel like some sort of dark-suited
clipboard man is going to be there -
3:22 - 3:24to tell me that my time is kind of up.
-
3:24 - 3:25And being a crap cook,
-
3:25 - 3:29I'm quite relieved when it's just
someone with a pizza for the kids. -
3:29 - 3:30(Laughter)
-
3:31 - 3:33But it's important to note
that it's not all bad. -
3:33 - 3:36There's a lot of goodness,
I think, in those feelings. -
3:36 - 3:42And this isn't some sort of
motivational-poster type talk, -
3:42 - 3:43a "Begin it now."
-
3:45 - 3:49It's more of an introspection into
my own experiences of impostor syndrome, -
3:49 - 3:51and how I've tried
to learn to harness them -
3:51 - 3:53and turn them into some sort
of a force for good. -
3:54 - 3:56And a great example of those experiences
-
3:56 - 3:58is in the early days
of Atlassian's history. -
3:58 - 4:02We were about four years old,
and we had about 70 employees. -
4:02 - 4:04And at the advice of our auditors --
-
4:04 - 4:07most good stories start
with advice from an auditor -- -
4:07 - 4:08(Laughter)
-
4:08 - 4:12we entered the New South Wales
Entrepreneur of the Year competition. -
4:12 - 4:15Now, we were surprised when we won
-
4:15 - 4:17the New South Wales
Entrepreneur of the Year -
4:17 - 4:19in the young category
for entrepreneurs under 40. -
4:19 - 4:21There were eight categories.
-
4:21 - 4:23And so surprised, in fact,
-
4:23 - 4:25having looked at the list of people
we were up against, -
4:25 - 4:28I didn't even turn up
to the awards ceremony. -
4:28 - 4:30So Scott collected the gong by himself.
-
4:31 - 4:34And then we traveled off
to the national awards. -
4:34 - 4:36I thought I should probably
turn up to those. -
4:36 - 4:38So we rented some suits,
-
4:38 - 4:41I invited a girl that I had just met --
-
4:41 - 4:42we'll get to her in a second --
-
4:42 - 4:43(Laughter)
-
4:43 - 4:46and off we went to the big black-tie gala.
-
4:47 - 4:49Now, our surprise turned to shock
-
4:49 - 4:52in the first award of the night,
the young category, -
4:52 - 4:53when we beat all of the other states
-
4:53 - 4:56and won the Australian
Young Entrepreneur of the Year. -
4:56 - 4:57When the shock had worn off,
-
4:57 - 5:00we got a lot of champagne to the table
and the party began, -
5:00 - 5:02and the night was surely over.
-
5:02 - 5:03We were having a royally great time.
-
5:03 - 5:06Fast-forward to the last
award of the night, -
5:06 - 5:09and our shock turned
into everybody's shock -
5:09 - 5:11when we won the Australian
Entrepreneur of the Year -
5:11 - 5:13against all of the other categories.
-
5:13 - 5:15Now, so shocked was
everybody else, in fact, -
5:15 - 5:17that the announcer,
the CEO of Ernst and Young, -
5:17 - 5:19opened the envelope,
-
5:19 - 5:21and the first words out of his mouth
were, "Oh my God." -
5:21 - 5:22(Laughter)
-
5:23 - 5:25And then he reset himself
and announced that we had won. -
5:25 - 5:27(Laughter)
-
5:27 - 5:29So we knew we were in way too deep.
-
5:29 - 5:31And from there,
the water got a lot deeper, -
5:31 - 5:33because we jetted off to Monte Carlo
-
5:33 - 5:36to represent Australia
in the World Entrepreneur of the Year -
5:36 - 5:38against 40 other different countries.
-
5:40 - 5:44Now, in another rented suit,
I was at one of the dinners -
5:44 - 5:48and sitting next to a lovely man
called Belmiro de Azevedo, -
5:48 - 5:49who was the winner from Portugal.
-
5:49 - 5:51Total champion.
-
5:51 - 5:54At 65, he had been running
his business for 40 years. -
5:54 - 5:56He had 30,000 employees.
-
5:56 - 5:58Don't forget, at the time, we had 70.
-
5:58 - 6:01And he had four billion euro in turnover.
-
6:01 - 6:03And after a couple of wines,
-
6:03 - 6:07I remember admitting to him that I felt
that we did not deserve to be there, -
6:07 - 6:09that we were well out of our depth,
-
6:09 - 6:12and at some time, someone
was going to figure this out -
6:12 - 6:13and send us home to Australia.
-
6:14 - 6:16And he, I remember,
just paused and looked at me -
6:16 - 6:20and said that he felt exactly the same way
-
6:20 - 6:23and that he suspected all the winners
were feeling that way, -
6:23 - 6:27and that despite not knowing Scott or I
or really anything about technology, -
6:27 - 6:29he said that we were obviously
doing something right -
6:29 - 6:31and should probably just keep going.
-
6:31 - 6:32(Laughter)
-
6:32 - 6:36Now, this was a pretty big
light bulb moment for me for two reasons. -
6:36 - 6:39One, I realized that
other people felt this as well. -
6:39 - 6:43And two, I realized it doesn't go away
with any form of success. -
6:43 - 6:46I had assumed that successful people
didn't feel like frauds, -
6:46 - 6:49and I now know that the opposite
is more likely to be true. -
6:50 - 6:52And this isn't just a feeling
that I have at work. -
6:52 - 6:54It happens in my personal life, too.
-
6:54 - 6:56In the early days,
-
6:56 - 6:59I was flying back and forth
to San Francisco every week for Atlassian, -
6:59 - 7:01and I racked up a lot
of frequent flyer points -
7:01 - 7:03and got access to
the Qantas business lounge. -
7:03 - 7:06Now, if there's ever a place
that I don't belong ... -
7:06 - 7:07(Laughter)
-
7:07 - 7:11It doesn't help when I walk in and they
generally look at me in shorts and jeans, -
7:11 - 7:15or jeans and a T-shirt, and say,
"Can I help you, son? Are you lost?" -
7:15 - 7:18But anyway, sometimes life
happens in the Qantas lounge -
7:18 - 7:20when you'd least expect it.
-
7:20 - 7:22One morning, over a decade ago,
-
7:22 - 7:24I was sitting there on
my regularly weekly commute, -
7:24 - 7:27and a beautiful woman
from way out of my league -
7:27 - 7:31walked into the Qantas lounge
and continued walking straight up to me -
7:31 - 7:33in a case of mistaken identity.
-
7:34 - 7:36She thought I was someone else,
-
7:36 - 7:38so in this case, I actually
was an impostor. -
7:38 - 7:41(Laughter)
-
7:41 - 7:44But rather than freeze
as I would have historically done -
7:44 - 7:48or chivalrously maybe
informed her of her error, -
7:48 - 7:51I just tried to keep
the conversation going. -
7:51 - 7:52(Laughter)
-
7:52 - 7:55And classic Australian bullshit
became some sort of forward movement -
7:55 - 7:57and a phone number.
-
7:57 - 8:03And I took that girl to the awards
ceremony a couple of months later. -
8:03 - 8:05And more than a decade later,
-
8:05 - 8:07I'm incredibly happy
that she is now my wife, -
8:07 - 8:09and we have four amazing
children together. -
8:09 - 8:13(Applause)
-
8:15 - 8:18But you'd think that when
I wake up every morning, -
8:18 - 8:21I wouldn't roll over and look at her
and think, "She's going to say, -
8:21 - 8:24'Who are you, and who gave you
that side of the bed?' -
8:24 - 8:25(Laughter)
-
8:25 - 8:26'Get out of here.'"
-
8:27 - 8:28But she doesn't.
-
8:28 - 8:31And I think she sometimes
feels the same way. -
8:32 - 8:34And apparently, that's one of the reasons
-
8:34 - 8:36that we'll likely have
a successful marriage. -
8:36 - 8:38You see, in researching this talk,
-
8:38 - 8:41I learned that one of the attributes
of the most successful relationships -
8:41 - 8:44is when both partners
feel out of their league. -
8:44 - 8:46They feel that their partner
is out of their league. -
8:46 - 8:48They feel like impostors.
-
8:48 - 8:51And if they don't freeze,
and they're thankful, -
8:51 - 8:54and they work harder and they stretch
to be the best partner they can, -
8:54 - 8:57it's likely to be a very
successful relationship. -
8:57 - 8:59So if you have this feeling, don't freeze.
-
8:59 - 9:01Try to keep the conversation going,
-
9:02 - 9:05even if she thinks that you're
somebody that you're not. -
9:07 - 9:09Now, feeling like, or people
thinking I'm someone I'm not -
9:09 - 9:11actually happens quite frequently.
-
9:12 - 9:14A great example from my more recent past,
-
9:14 - 9:17a few months ago, I was up
late at night with one of my kids, -
9:17 - 9:19and I saw something on Twitter
-
9:19 - 9:22about Tesla saying that they could solve
-
9:22 - 9:24South Australia's rolling
series of power crises -
9:24 - 9:27with one of their large
industrial batteries. -
9:27 - 9:30Without thinking,
I fired off a bunch of tweets, -
9:30 - 9:33challenging them and saying
were they really serious about this. -
9:34 - 9:37And in doing so, I managed
to kick a very small rock -
9:37 - 9:38off a very big hill
-
9:38 - 9:42that turned into an avalanche that I
found myself tumbling in the middle of. -
9:42 - 9:45Because you see, a few hours later,
Elon tweeted me back and said -
9:45 - 9:47that they were deadly serious,
-
9:47 - 9:49that within a hundred days
of contract signing, -
9:49 - 9:51they could install
a 100-megawatt-hour facility, -
9:51 - 9:54which is a giant battery
of a world-class size, -
9:54 - 9:56one of the biggest
ever made on the planet. -
9:56 - 9:59And that's when all hell
really broke loose. -
9:59 - 10:02Within 24 hours, I had
every major media outlet -
10:02 - 10:05texting and emailing and trying
to get in contact with me -
10:05 - 10:08to get opinion as some sort of
"expert" in energy. -
10:08 - 10:10(Laughter)
-
10:10 - 10:14Now, at the time, I couldn't really
have told you the difference -
10:14 - 10:19between a one-and-a-half-volt AA battery
that goes in my kids' toys -
10:19 - 10:23and a 100-megawatt-hour
industrial-scale battery facility -
10:23 - 10:24that goes in South Australia
-
10:24 - 10:26that could potentially
solve their power crisis. -
10:27 - 10:29I was now feeling a chronic case
of impostor syndrome, -
10:29 - 10:30(Laughter)
-
10:31 - 10:32and it got truly bizarre.
-
10:33 - 10:35And I remember thinking to myself,
-
10:35 - 10:39"Shit. I've kind of started something here
and I can't really get out. -
10:39 - 10:42If I abandon the situation,
-
10:42 - 10:45I'm going to sort of set back
renewables in Australia -
10:45 - 10:48and maybe just look like a complete idiot
-
10:48 - 10:50because of my idiocy on Twitter."
-
10:50 - 10:52So I thought the only thing I could do
-
10:52 - 10:55was to try not to freeze
and to try to learn. -
10:55 - 10:56So I spent a week
-
10:56 - 11:00trying to learn everything I could
about industrial-scale batteries -
11:00 - 11:03and the electricity grid and renewables
and the economics of all of this -
11:03 - 11:06and whether this was even
a feasible proposal. -
11:06 - 11:08I talked to the chief scientist,
I talked to the CSIRO, -
11:08 - 11:13had multiple ministers and premiers
trying to give me their side of the story -
11:13 - 11:14from both sides of the aisle.
-
11:15 - 11:18I managed to exchange
tweets with the prime minister. -
11:18 - 11:21I even managed to pull off
a passing impression, let's say, -
11:21 - 11:23of an energy expert on ABC Lateline.
-
11:23 - 11:25(Laughter)
-
11:26 - 11:27But as a result of all this,
-
11:27 - 11:30South Australia did put out
a battery tender, -
11:30 - 11:33and they had more than 90 applications
for that battery tender. -
11:34 - 11:37And the national conversation
over a period of a few months -
11:37 - 11:41moved from the sort of theatrical
lumps of coal in the parliament -
11:41 - 11:44to discussing kind of which
industrial-scale battery chemistry -
11:44 - 11:47was the best for building
large-scale renewable batteries. -
11:47 - 11:51So I think that the important lesson
is by that time in my life, -
11:51 - 11:53I knew well that I was an impostor.
-
11:53 - 11:55I knew I was miles out of my depth.
-
11:55 - 11:58But instead of freezing,
I tried to learn as much as I could, -
11:58 - 12:02motivated by my fear
of generally looking like an idiot, -
12:02 - 12:05and tried to turn that
into some sort of a force for good. -
12:06 - 12:08So one of the things I've learned
-
12:08 - 12:13is that people think successful people
don't feel like frauds. -
12:14 - 12:17But I think, especially
knowing a lot of entrepreneurs, -
12:17 - 12:19the opposite is more likely to be true.
-
12:20 - 12:25But the most successful people I know
don't question themselves, -
12:25 - 12:28but they do heavily question,
regularly question, their ideas -
12:28 - 12:30and their knowledge.
-
12:30 - 12:33They know when the water is way too deep,
-
12:33 - 12:35and they're not afraid to ask for advice.
-
12:35 - 12:37They don't see that as a bad thing.
-
12:37 - 12:40And they use that advice
to hone those ideas, to improve them -
12:40 - 12:41and to learn.
-
12:41 - 12:44And it's OK to be
out of your depth sometimes. -
12:44 - 12:46I'm frequently out of my depth.
-
12:46 - 12:48It's OK to be out of your depth.
-
12:48 - 12:51It's OK to be in a situation where
you just can't push the eject button, -
12:51 - 12:54so long as you don't freeze,
-
12:54 - 12:56so long as you harness the situation,
don't be paralyzed -
12:56 - 12:59and try to turn it into
some sort of a force for good. -
12:59 - 13:02And it's important
that I say "harness" here, -
13:02 - 13:04because this isn't sort of
pop-psychology BS -
13:04 - 13:07about conquering impostor syndrome for me.
-
13:07 - 13:08It's merely about being aware of it.
-
13:09 - 13:13In fact, I'm extremely aware
of feeling like an impostor right now, -
13:13 - 13:15as I'm up here, some sort of pseudo-expert
-
13:15 - 13:19on a feeling that I couldn't even
put a name to a few months ago, -
13:19 - 13:21when I agreed to do this talk.
-
13:21 - 13:24Which, if you think about it,
is kind of the point, isn't it? -
13:24 - 13:25(Laughter)
-
13:25 - 13:26Thank you.
-
13:26 - 13:29(Applause)
- Title:
- How you can use impostor syndrome to your benefit
- Speaker:
- Mike Cannon-Brookes
- Description:
-
Have you ever doubted your abilities, feared you were going to be discovered as a "fraud"? That's called "impostor syndrome," and you're definitely not alone in feeling it, says entrepreneur and CEO Mike Cannon-Brookes. In this funny, relatable talk, he shares how his own experiences of impostor syndrome helped pave the way to his success -- and shows how you can use it to your advantage, too.
- Video Language:
- English
- Team:
- closed TED
- Project:
- TEDTalks
- Duration:
- 13:42
Erin Gregory edited English subtitles for How you can use impostor syndrome to your benefit | ||
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Erin Gregory edited English subtitles for How you can use impostor syndrome to your benefit | ||
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Camille Martínez edited English subtitles for How you can use impostor syndrome to your benefit | ||
Camille Martínez edited English subtitles for How you can use impostor syndrome to your benefit |