0:00:10.230,0:00:11.599 This is from Haley. 0:00:11.599,0:00:13.297 "I'm 16 and have been saved 0:00:13.297,0:00:16.297 for about two years. 0:00:16.297,0:00:18.410 I live with my dad who is also saved. 0:00:18.410,0:00:20.866 My mom is a professing Christian, 0:00:20.866,0:00:23.240 but has made it very obvious she is not. 0:00:23.240,0:00:24.667 She lives with her boyfriend, 0:00:24.667,0:00:26.657 uses the Lord's name in vain frequently... 0:00:26.657,0:00:29.351 I've written her and witnessed to her countless times. 0:00:29.351,0:00:32.269 My question is, in the Bible, the Lord says, 0:00:32.269,0:00:35.735 "do not even eat" with someone 0:00:35.735,0:00:39.073 who claims Christ but is immoral. 0:00:39.073,0:00:42.158 Does this mean I cannot have a relationship with my mom? 0:00:42.158,0:00:44.769 Thank you for your time, Haley." 0:00:44.769,0:00:46.499 I'll tell you what. 0:00:46.499,0:00:50.345 Do you know where she gets that from? 0:00:50.345,0:00:54.605 1 Corinthians? 0:00:54.605,0:00:56.445 Somebody know where that is? 0:00:56.445,0:00:58.495 Where it says not to associate with 0:00:58.495,0:01:00.357 anybody that calls himself a brother, 0:01:00.357,0:01:02.169 anybody who's a professing Christian? 0:01:02.169,0:01:06.036 1 Corinthians 5. Let's read it. 0:01:06.036,0:01:08.403 Turn there if you have your Bible. 0:01:08.403,0:01:10.787 1 Corinthians 5:9-11. 0:01:10.787,0:01:14.297 I just want you to see the flavor of this. 0:01:14.297,0:01:17.306 Now let me tell you something. 0:01:17.306,0:01:20.783 Young people, pay attention to this, 0:01:20.783,0:01:24.127 even though Haley is dealing with this 0:01:24.127,0:01:26.067 with regards to her mom, 0:01:26.067,0:01:27.708 this is something 0:01:27.708,0:01:30.528 especially you guys that are coming out of other churches 0:01:30.528,0:01:32.379 and still have friends in other churches 0:01:32.379,0:01:34.540 and you have family members that claim 0:01:34.540,0:01:37.272 to be Christians and all sorts of things like this. 0:01:37.272,0:01:39.202 There's a lot of application here. 0:01:39.202,0:01:41.925 In fact, more so than I think sometimes we 0:01:41.925,0:01:44.544 acknowledge in our day. 0:01:44.544,0:01:47.024 1 Corinthians 5:9 0:01:47.024,0:01:48.688 "I wrote to you in my letter 0:01:48.688,0:01:53.393 not to associate with sexually immoral people. 0:01:53.393,0:01:57.118 Not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world." 0:01:57.118,0:01:59.583 Do you see? Paul wants us to be evangelistic. 0:01:59.583,0:02:02.831 Does he want us rubbing shoulders with red-blooded sinners? 0:02:02.831,0:02:04.881 You better believe he does. 0:02:04.881,0:02:09.301 He's not saying, "come away from all 0:02:09.301,0:02:13.683 the sexually immoral people in the world." 0:02:13.683,0:02:15.880 "Or the greedy or the swindlers or the idolaters, 0:02:15.880,0:02:17.842 since then you would need to go out of the world." 0:02:17.842,0:02:18.929 And that's not what he wants. 0:02:18.929,0:02:22.984 Christ said you're the salt, you're the light. 0:02:22.984,0:02:24.544 We need to be in the world; 0:02:24.544,0:02:26.068 we need to be out there in the world. 0:02:26.068,0:02:28.725 We need to be salt and light in this world. 0:02:28.725,0:02:30.690 We need to shine in the darkness. 0:02:30.690,0:02:33.541 We need to be salt in a decaying and a foul 0:02:33.541,0:02:37.079 and a corrupt generation in which we live. 0:02:37.079,0:02:38.390 Verse 11 0:02:38.390,0:02:42.200 "But now I'm writing to you not to associate 0:02:42.200,0:02:45.565 with anyone who bears the name of brother, 0:02:45.565,0:02:48.013 if he's guilty of sexual immorality or greed 0:02:48.013,0:02:50.657 or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, swindler - 0:02:50.657,0:02:52.379 not even to eat with such a one." 0:02:52.379,0:02:53.635 Let me tell you something, 0:02:53.635,0:02:56.225 Haley's question deserves a lot of attention 0:02:56.225,0:02:59.404 in our day and age - you know why? 0:02:59.404,0:03:03.720 Now you guys know 1 Corinthians 5, 0:03:03.720,0:03:05.756 if you know your Bibles very well, 0:03:05.756,0:03:08.847 this is coming after Paul has described a situation 0:03:08.847,0:03:13.011 about a man who was sleeping with his father's wife. 0:03:13.011,0:03:14.761 You guys remember the account? 0:03:14.761,0:03:16.613 Paul says you guys have been arrogant, 0:03:16.613,0:03:19.244 you need to put this guy out to the devil, 0:03:19.244,0:03:20.534 get rid of him! 0:03:20.534,0:03:23.294 A little leaven leavens the whole lump. 0:03:23.294,0:03:24.714 You've got a problem there, you've got sin, 0:03:24.714,0:03:26.088 this guy calls himself a brother. 0:03:26.088,0:03:27.985 Get him out. 0:03:27.985,0:03:30.335 And there is evidence, is there not? 0:03:30.335,0:03:33.540 We're not told exactly, but there is some evidence 0:03:33.540,0:03:37.277 that in 2 Corinthians that this guy was restored. 0:03:37.277,0:03:39.121 But here's the thing. 0:03:39.121,0:03:41.511 I think we might have a tendency 0:03:41.511,0:03:45.361 to do something as Christians. 0:03:45.361,0:03:47.951 Let me just give you an example: 0:03:47.951,0:03:49.999 We had this guy Bruce... 0:03:49.999,0:03:53.757 come into our church claiming to be a Christian. 0:03:53.757,0:03:55.466 If you don't come to our church, I'll fill you in. 0:03:55.466,0:03:57.450 This guy started coming to our church, 0:03:57.450,0:03:59.775 and he'd come in drunk. 0:03:59.775,0:04:01.660 I mean, he was a homeless guy, 0:04:01.660,0:04:04.177 living on the street, and he was a drunk. 0:04:04.177,0:04:06.474 And he'd come in and say he was a Christian. 0:04:06.474,0:04:11.017 And he'd interrupt things and do bizarre things. 0:04:11.017,0:04:14.012 He threatened one of the guys in the church 0:04:14.012,0:04:16.171 busting his teeth out when he confronted him 0:04:16.171,0:04:19.070 about whether he was a true Christian or not. 0:04:19.070,0:04:22.473 Which kind of gives away where he's at. 0:04:22.473,0:04:24.621 But here's the thing, 0:04:24.621,0:04:29.632 I think we live in a country where there are 0:04:29.632,0:04:33.970 multitudes of false professors. 0:04:33.970,0:04:36.600 Because we've got such a cheap gospel out there today, 0:04:36.600,0:04:39.093 which is no gospel - not a true one. 0:04:39.093,0:04:42.130 We've got people being pipelined into the Kingdom 0:04:42.130,0:04:46.385 through short little sinner's prayers. 0:04:46.385,0:04:53.194 Repentant-less messages like I told you about earlier. 0:04:53.194,0:04:56.882 It's mass producing false converts. 0:04:56.882,0:04:58.638 But see, I think sometimes we think, 0:04:58.638,0:05:00.528 well, the guy in 1 Corinthians 5, 0:05:00.528,0:05:02.476 sometimes it goes into our mind, 0:05:02.476,0:05:04.286 he really was a true Christian, 0:05:04.286,0:05:05.533 and when he was put out, 0:05:05.533,0:05:07.304 he repented and he came back. 0:05:07.304,0:05:09.314 And so I think sometimes what happens is 0:05:09.314,0:05:11.653 we have people who profess to be Christians, 0:05:11.653,0:05:15.300 and we tend to categorize them in our mind. 0:05:15.300,0:05:17.264 We tend to categorize them either as somebody who 0:05:17.264,0:05:21.158 we genuinely think is a Christian 0:05:21.158,0:05:23.238 and probably needs to be disciplined 0:05:23.238,0:05:24.875 because they've fallen into some sin, 0:05:24.875,0:05:26.403 and we're hoping they'll come to repentance. 0:05:26.403,0:05:28.574 Versus somebody that we look at and we say, 0:05:28.574,0:05:30.762 "Ah, they're lost." 0:05:30.762,0:05:32.078 And so what we can tend to do is 0:05:32.078,0:05:34.771 say, well, the guy who we think is a Christian 0:05:34.771,0:05:36.850 who has fallen into this sin, we ought to discipline him. 0:05:36.850,0:05:38.866 We ought to put him out to Satan, like it said there, 0:05:38.866,0:05:41.512 but this guy over here like Bruce, 0:05:41.512,0:05:44.903 we look at him and we say, yeah, but he's lost; 0:05:44.903,0:05:45.983 he's deceived. 0:05:45.983,0:05:48.252 So we don't deal with them the same way. 0:05:48.252,0:05:51.098 But listen to me, Paul doesn't say that. 0:05:51.098,0:05:53.442 Paul doesn't say evaluate whether you think he is 0:05:53.442,0:05:54.326 a Christian or not. 0:05:54.326,0:05:57.812 Paul says if a guy says he's a brother, 0:05:57.812,0:06:01.286 and he's involved in some habitual sin, 0:06:01.286,0:06:03.256 just like we were talking about, 0:06:03.256,0:06:04.836 put him out. 0:06:04.836,0:06:07.386 In fact, it doesn't just say put him out, 0:06:07.386,0:06:09.250 it says not to even associate with him, 0:06:09.250,0:06:13.357 not to even eat with him. 0:06:13.357,0:06:14.865 Folks, let me tell you something. 0:06:14.865,0:06:17.288 We've lost this. 0:06:17.288,0:06:19.662 We don't do this. 0:06:19.662,0:06:24.887 And I'm not just speaking to you - I'm speaking to myself. 0:06:24.887,0:06:29.002 Are we as a pattern coming across people 0:06:29.002,0:06:32.108 that say they're Christians 0:06:32.108,0:06:34.438 and they're living in sin 0:06:34.438,0:06:37.538 and we just kind of write them off as lost people, 0:06:37.538,0:06:40.420 and kind of approach them evangelistically. 0:06:40.420,0:06:43.327 But that's not what it says to do here. 0:06:43.327,0:06:48.761 It says, don't associate with them. 0:06:48.761,0:06:50.536 Are we doing that? 0:06:50.536,0:06:53.368 Now, of course, her question is she's got a mother that way. 0:06:53.368,0:06:55.320 Now I would say this, 0:06:55.320,0:06:57.260 Paul says in 1 Corinthians 5, 0:06:57.260,0:06:58.838 when the church comes together. 0:06:58.838,0:07:01.770 This is a church discipline situation. 0:07:01.770,0:07:04.411 This isn't something that the government's told to do. 0:07:04.411,0:07:06.827 It's not something the family is told to do. 0:07:06.827,0:07:09.252 It's not something the employer is told to do. 0:07:09.252,0:07:12.522 It's something the church has been told to do. 0:07:12.522,0:07:14.137 It's a spiritual thing. 0:07:14.137,0:07:16.160 I would say this, look, 0:07:16.160,0:07:20.450 if somebody's husband gets disciplined, 0:07:20.450,0:07:23.616 the woman is still bound 0:07:23.616,0:07:32.071 by her marriage vows to be his wife. 0:07:32.071,0:07:35.794 This girl, what should her relationship be? 0:07:35.794,0:07:38.621 Let me tell you this: 0:07:38.621,0:07:40.847 It's something the church does - it's not something 0:07:40.847,0:07:42.901 that specifically the family's told to do. 0:07:42.901,0:07:44.782 And all I can tell you is this: 0:07:44.782,0:07:49.672 We have no specific biblical example where 0:07:49.672,0:07:52.240 discipline takes place 0:07:52.240,0:07:54.790 and there is a family member there 0:07:54.790,0:07:58.590 and how they are to relate. 0:07:58.590,0:08:00.322 But I would tell you this, 0:08:00.322,0:08:04.592 because the principal behind non-association is 0:08:04.592,0:08:09.043 that leaven leavens the whole lump. 0:08:09.043,0:08:12.584 What's that mean? 0:08:12.584,0:08:17.292 What is a little leaven leavens the whole lump mean? 0:08:17.292,0:08:18.578 What's the leaven? 0:08:18.578,0:08:20.095 Sin. 0:08:20.095,0:08:23.279 Where there's sin, it has a tendency to do what? 0:08:23.279,0:08:25.052 To spread. 0:08:25.052,0:08:29.028 Just like yeast, or leaven in bread, it spreads through the whole. 0:08:29.028,0:08:32.661 If you allow sin in the church to go unchecked, 0:08:32.661,0:08:35.327 what Paul's saying is, 0:08:35.327,0:08:38.459 what happens is it infects. 0:08:38.459,0:08:41.736 And the fact is, I'll guarantee you this, 0:08:41.736,0:08:45.689 what happens is we get in a world of people 0:08:45.689,0:08:49.996 that profess Christianity that are living in all sorts of sin. 0:08:49.996,0:08:52.446 You just immerse yourself in that long enough 0:08:52.446,0:08:55.423 and there is an infection that comes from it. 0:08:55.423,0:08:58.728 There is a yeast there. There's a spreading 0:08:58.728,0:09:01.509 that tends to dull down what true Christianity is. 0:09:01.509,0:09:03.165 It has an effect. 0:09:03.165,0:09:05.112 We're told not to associate. 0:09:05.112,0:09:06.853 But I'll tell you when it comes to a child, 0:09:06.853,0:09:07.853 when it comes to a parent, 0:09:07.853,0:09:10.490 when it comes to a spouse, 0:09:10.490,0:09:12.927 are they to sever those family relationships? 0:09:12.927,0:09:17.069 We're not told specifically, but I'll tell you this, 0:09:17.069,0:09:21.137 that wife, that husband, that child, that parent, 0:09:21.137,0:09:25.639 needs to be aware of what the spiritual reality 0:09:25.639,0:09:28.137 behind church discipline is all about. 0:09:28.137,0:09:32.196 It's meant to prevent sin from spreading. 0:09:32.196,0:09:33.196 And so I would say, 0:09:33.196,0:09:36.511 if a family member is ever put in that situation, 0:09:36.511,0:09:40.054 though I would not say that they are to cast 0:09:40.054,0:09:42.502 honoring the parent out the window, 0:09:42.502,0:09:44.939 or the wife loving the husband out the window, 0:09:44.939,0:09:48.775 when it comes to a church disciplinary situation, 0:09:48.775,0:09:51.097 they need to be very aware of the fact that 0:09:51.097,0:09:53.077 whatever leaven existed 0:09:53.077,0:09:55.646 that caused the discipline to take place, 0:09:55.646,0:09:57.180 they need to pray for special grace 0:09:57.180,0:09:59.476 not to be infected by; and they need to pray 0:09:59.476,0:10:02.616 for the grace to abide in the midst of that 0:10:02.616,0:10:06.657 and not be tainted by it. 0:10:06.657,0:10:07.917 And let me just tell you this too, 0:10:07.917,0:10:12.320 it's 2 Thessalonians 3, where it says, 0:10:12.320,0:10:14.634 "if anyone does not obey what we say 0:10:14.634,0:10:16.959 in this letter take note of that person, 0:10:16.959,0:10:18.921 and have nothing to do with them, 0:10:18.921,0:10:20.624 that they may be ashamed." 0:10:20.624,0:10:22.329 That's 2 Thessalonians 3:14 following. 0:10:22.329,0:10:23.647 But it says this, 0:10:23.647,0:10:28.552 "Do not regard him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother." 0:10:28.552,0:10:30.990 You know, in all the non-association that we have 0:10:30.990,0:10:34.659 with disciplined people, it doesn't rule out - 0:10:34.659,0:10:36.345 it says don't eat with them, 0:10:36.345,0:10:39.398 I'll tell you what, if there was a disciplined brother 0:10:39.398,0:10:41.801 that I was going to have over to my house to eat with, 0:10:41.801,0:10:44.001 and all I was going to do is use it as an occasion 0:10:44.001,0:10:45.934 to warn him and admonish him, 0:10:45.934,0:10:49.924 I would feel liberty to do that. 0:10:49.924,0:10:51.020 Warning. 0:10:51.020,0:10:53.670 And if this young lady, 0:10:53.670,0:10:55.594 she has been doing the right thing. 0:10:55.594,0:11:00.347 She has been confronting her mother with that sin. 0:11:00.347,0:11:02.593 And that's a loving thing; that's an honorable thing. 0:11:02.593,0:11:04.467 She's desiring the best for her mother. 0:11:04.467,0:11:06.295 That's reverencing her mother. 0:11:06.295,0:11:07.631 And it would be the same situation 0:11:07.631,0:11:10.996 if it was a woman to her husband, a husband to his wife. 0:11:10.996,0:11:12.755 If they want the best, they want them to 0:11:12.755,0:11:15.001 come to repentance over the matter. 0:11:15.001,0:11:16.212 They either want them to come to repentance 0:11:16.212,0:11:18.071 or give up their profession. 0:11:18.071,0:11:19.214 Right? 0:11:19.214,0:11:24.989 Come clean that you're lost. Or repent. 0:11:24.989,0:11:28.138 And so to press people and admonish them and warn them 0:11:28.138,0:11:31.826 is what we're told to do in 2 Thessalonians 3:14. 0:11:31.826,0:11:33.286 And so I would just say that, 0:11:33.286,0:11:36.626 that family member needs to keep that in mind. 0:11:36.626,0:11:38.512 And obviously, if the wife's living with the husband, 0:11:38.512,0:11:42.135 she's not going to spend 24/7 admonishing the husband. 0:11:42.135,0:11:43.573 She's going to know when to do it; 0:11:43.573,0:11:45.732 seek God for proper opportunity to do it. 0:11:45.732,0:11:47.852 And maybe in many ways, 0:11:47.852,0:11:51.390 she's going to seek to be that 1 Peter 3 woman, 0:11:51.390,0:11:55.477 who without a word is just seeking to win her husband. 0:11:55.477,0:12:00.704 Whether it's to repentance or to the faith. 0:12:00.704,0:12:02.001 Whichever it might be. 0:12:02.001,0:12:03.030 But taking that approach, 0:12:03.030,0:12:04.125 and that might be a good approach 0:12:04.125,0:12:06.219 for a child to take too. 0:12:06.219,0:12:07.821 Like I say, we don't have a specific 0:12:07.821,0:12:09.676 example of this in Scripture. 0:12:09.676,0:12:14.281 And I know out at Community Baptist Church, 0:12:14.281,0:12:16.901 not the same church that I was talking about up on 0:12:16.901,0:12:18.603 1604, not the same one, 0:12:18.603,0:12:21.115 this is a different one - this is down 1604 on the South side. 0:12:21.115,0:12:25.845 But we had situations where members were disciplined 0:12:25.845,0:12:29.610 who had spouses or parents or children 0:12:29.610,0:12:31.976 who were members of the church as well, 0:12:31.976,0:12:33.639 so this came up. 0:12:33.639,0:12:40.139 And obviously, the family relationship was never severed 0:12:40.139,0:12:41.955 because of that, 0:12:41.955,0:12:47.229 but there is a way to walk in the midst of it in wisdom.