0:00:00.813,0:00:03.670 http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0484384/ 0:00:03.670,0:00:09.946 [ominous music in background, soundscape... sounds like a heartbeat] 0:00:44.678,0:00:46.313 I asked for directions, 0:00:46.313,0:00:48.783 and this guy gave me directions, 0:00:48.783,0:00:50.968 and I noticed in his hand he had a knife, 0:00:50.968,0:00:52.175 and he had the knife out, 0:00:52.175,0:00:54.188 and that that knife was about this long... 0:00:54.188,0:00:56.924 [another voice] He came up to me and he said 0:00:56.924,0:00:59.260 "Let me see your license", 0:00:59.260,0:01:03.297 and then he spit at my shoe. 0:01:03.297,0:01:04.431 In Atlanta... 0:01:04.431,0:01:06.266 one inch from my shoe... 0:01:06.266,0:01:12.072 I mean, it felt like he was saying "motherfucker, make a move"... 0:01:12.072,0:01:14.308 I was the only white worker 0:01:14.308,0:01:18.646 got beat up and got it taken away... 0:01:22.016,0:01:24.852 You look more white than we do... 0:01:24.852,0:01:29.236 I may look more white but no way do I cross that line... 0:01:30.224,0:01:33.260 ...the fear is still there because I know it can happen... 0:01:33.260,0:01:34.328 because it has happened, 0:01:34.328,0:01:35.662 not to me... 0:01:35.662,0:01:37.616 but to other people who look just like me... 0:01:38.476,0:01:40.667 Another one went in the laundromat at another time, 0:01:40.667,0:01:42.269 came up to me with a $10 bill 0:01:42.269,0:01:43.804 and waved it in front of me, said 0:01:43.804,0:01:45.839 "change? change?" 0:01:45.839,0:01:49.243 and she was anunciating very carefully... 0:01:49.243,0:01:51.812 we always _ you baby, always, 0:01:51.812,0:01:53.547 every day. 0:01:53.547,0:01:57.051 We ride up here... it's all oh man where are we now?? 0:01:57.051,0:02:01.139 oh god! I hate being out of the city! 0:02:01.139,0:02:03.257 Because I know who's out here" 0:02:03.257,0:02:05.859 You block your progress... 0:02:05.859,0:02:08.395 I block my own progress? 0:02:13.631,0:02:14.568 You know, as I look around this room, 0:02:14.568,0:02:19.673 I realize, you know, the connection is really me, 0:02:19.673,0:02:23.043 because I actually know each one of you in a very special way, 0:02:23.043,0:02:26.380 some of you I just met actually. 0:02:26.380,0:02:28.682 Each of you were picked very particularly, 0:02:28.682,0:02:30.417 and it took time to do that. 0:02:30.417,0:02:32.486 Each of you were picked for your honesty, 0:02:32.486,0:02:36.957 and for your directness, 0:02:36.957,0:02:38.025 and for your sincerity, 0:02:38.025,0:02:40.194 and for the work that you do, too, on yourself. 0:02:40.194,0:02:44.281 That's why I really wanted to have you on film. 0:02:44.281,0:02:45.465 And your ethnicity? 0:02:45.465,0:02:48.068 I am American. 0:02:48.068,0:02:52.006 Generations back, we came from England and Denmark, 0:02:52.006,0:02:55.476 but mostly when they got into America here, 0:02:55.476,0:02:59.346 whatever happened, we got mixed up, 0:02:59.346,0:03:01.649 so I'm American. 0:03:01.649,0:03:03.751 A white American I guess. 0:03:03.751,0:03:08.221 My father is Mexican, my mother is Irish. 0:03:08.221,0:03:13.193 African, and, some ways back, Cherokee descent. 0:03:13.193,0:03:17.864 I'm a 3rd generation Japanese American man. 0:03:17.864,0:03:22.102 I'm 7th, at least 7th generation Euro-American. 0:03:22.102,0:03:26.874 Um, I have family is, on both sides, is Scot, 0:03:26.874,0:03:30.477 and on my father's side is also English and German. 0:03:30.477,0:03:33.981 I'm uh, I'm Mexican. 0:03:33.981,0:03:35.749 I'm Latino, I'm Mexican, 0:03:35.749,0:03:38.118 a Mexican-American, I'm Chicano. 0:03:39.041,0:03:43.200 I am Chinese, and I'm Chinese-American. 0:03:43.523,0:03:47.427 I am an American also. 0:03:47.427,0:03:49.763 I am an all-American man, 0:03:49.763,0:03:53.534 and the reason I say that is that 0:03:53.534,0:03:58.005 I was born here, educated here, and that makes me American. 0:03:58.005,0:04:02.977 But I do always want to be identified as African-American or Black, 0:04:02.977,0:04:04.812 not just an American. 0:04:04.812,0:04:06.180 The reason why I'm here, 0:04:06.180,0:04:07.514 and I'm glad to be here, 0:04:07.514,0:04:09.549 is because I have a lot of anger, 0:04:09.549,0:04:11.785 and this is a positive outlet for that anger. 0:04:11.785,0:04:14.654 I could do a lot of destructive things, 0:04:14.654,0:04:18.658 but that would be, that wouldn't be productive whatsoever. 0:04:18.658,0:04:24.331 I'm here because, um, I'm a racist. 0:04:24.331,0:04:31.605 And I've been working at it for, that being un-learning that, since '76. 0:04:31.605,0:04:35.576 And I've still got it, and there's a lot of pain around that. 0:04:35.576,0:04:40.113 And I'm nervous about being here, cause I don't know what's gonna happen. 0:04:40.113,0:04:42.249 I think one of the ways I've survived racism 0:04:42.249,0:04:43.984 is to be in complete control, 0:04:43.984,0:04:46.653 and I'm not in complete control here [laughs]. 0:04:46.653,0:04:48.455 So I'm a little worried about that. 0:04:48.455,0:04:53.193 And I'm just, y'know, trippin' on the, y'know, walkin' in here and seein' who was here. 0:04:53.193,0:04:56.055 I didn't expect white men to be here. 0:04:56.363,0:05:01.568 I'm a local boy, grown, raised right here in this small community, 0:05:01.568,0:05:04.305 and when the subject of racism was mentioned to me, 0:05:04.305,0:05:06.640 I found it extremely exciting 0:05:06.640,0:05:09.943 because I grew up in this area, 0:05:09.943,0:05:12.610 with friends of all races, 0:05:12.610,0:05:14.681 and we would read in the news, 0:05:14.681,0:05:16.016 see on the television, 0:05:16.016,0:05:18.685 of racial struggles in other areas, 0:05:18.685,0:05:22.122 and could not comprehend how that could be. 0:05:22.122,0:05:25.392 Why they had to cause struggle and strife for each other. 0:05:25.392,0:05:28.529 Why couldn't they be just like at home? 0:05:28.529,0:05:31.465 Happy and productive together. 0:05:31.465,0:05:36.403 Ad I don't think that anybody should be any less than another. 0:05:36.403,0:05:42.742 Uh, I grew up in this area right alongside the Native Americans, 0:05:42.742,0:05:45.629 and some of them to this day are my dearest friends, 0:05:45.629,0:05:49.683 and ... I like their cultures, yes. 0:05:49.683,0:05:53.620 And I even seek after artifacts from their history... 0:05:53.620,0:05:58.125 but there's no struggle or strife, 0:05:58.125,0:05:59.694 we don't cause it. 0:06:04.164,0:06:09.128 In Chinese, y'know, the word "American" really means "white" to us; 0:06:09.128,0:06:14.274 and uh, that's why today I actually will not use the word American either, 0:06:14.274,0:06:18.912 because I do believe that it really does not incorporate all of us. 0:06:18.912,0:06:23.850 That there really still is not that political, social, and economic equality. 0:06:23.850,0:06:28.756 And when that day comes, I'll be the first to stand up and say "I'm an American, 0:06:28.756,0:06:30.891 and stand with everyone". 0:06:30.891,0:06:35.062 Uh, but until I feel that, I think that I'll always feel that I have to say Chinese, 0:06:35.062,0:06:37.603 so that people know who I am. 0:06:38.338,0:06:39.700 3 years ago I went to Japan. 0:06:39.700,0:06:42.403 I said, I gotta go find my roots, 0:06:42.403,0:06:45.639 and find out who I really am. 0:06:45.639,0:06:49.376 Applied for the passport, filling out the things, 0:06:49.376,0:06:54.267 and ... nationality, it says "American". 0:06:54.267,0:06:57.817 Said to my wife "I can't put down 'American', I'm not 'American'". 0:06:57.817,0:07:01.355 She says "yeah, you're American, you gotta put down American". 0:07:01.355,0:07:03.090 I said "I'm Japanese". 0:07:03.090,0:07:05.726 You're not Japanese, you're American! 0:07:05.726,0:07:06.960 And I said, I can't do that. 0:07:06.960,0:07:09.229 I've never in my life claimed myself to be... 0:07:09.229,0:07:12.399 and I just said, like, well I'm gonna put Japanese down. 0:07:12.399,0:07:14.067 She says "you're not from Japan!" 0:07:14.067,0:07:15.602 [laughing] 0:07:15.602,0:07:16.803 you know? 0:07:16.803,0:07:18.772 "You were born here, you're American" 0:07:18.772,0:07:22.776 And... it just... I was just blown away by... 0:07:22.776,0:07:26.780 y'know, for the first time I had to put that down, 0:07:26.780,0:07:28.281 otherwise it would've been rejected, 0:07:28.281,0:07:30.099 I had no choice in that. 0:07:31.785,0:07:36.690 Do you think that we don't get excited as Americans 0:07:36.690,0:07:40.327 when you say you are something other than just American? 0:07:40.327,0:07:45.026 I got excited when Mun Wah said to us that he is Chinese American, 0:07:45.026,0:07:47.167 why can't he be just American, 0:07:47.167,0:07:50.134 and excited about being just American like David is? 0:07:50.134,0:07:51.705 Wait a minute, I just... 0:07:51.705,0:07:55.608 He calls himself an American... 0:07:55.608,0:07:59.913 But I'm doing that for a very specific purpose... 0:07:59.913,0:08:05.831 I'm doing it because I'm turning my identity as American 0:08:05.831,0:08:07.855 to fight against the white supremacist notion 0:08:07.855,0:08:13.896 that only white people merit the status of the title of American. 0:08:15.529,0:08:16.330 Well I agree with that... 0:08:16.330,0:08:23.036 I refuse to to be segregated to, or to be allocated to a lower status 0:08:23.036,0:08:26.344 by not being recognized as an American. 0:08:27.307,0:08:30.258 I like that attitude, and I think that's a correct and proper attitude... 0:08:31.144,0:08:36.650 But I'm also Chinese and very proud of that, 0:08:36.650,0:08:40.521 and for a person to look at me and say "you're just", 0:08:40.521,0:08:45.392 for a white person to look at me and say "you're just like me, we're both American" 0:08:45.392,0:08:51.669 totally insults me because it denies my identity as a Chinese person too. 0:08:52.596,0:08:55.869 I feel in a sense that I have a claim to be American 0:08:55.869,0:08:58.238 in ways that you don't. 0:08:58.238,0:09:01.241 Because my people came from this continent. 0:09:01.241,0:09:05.445 My ancestors came across the Bering Straight from Asia, 0:09:05.445,0:09:07.447 and came down the coast, 0:09:07.447,0:09:10.851 and on into central Mexico, 0:09:10.851,0:09:14.187 and others of my ancestors came from Arabia, 0:09:14.187,0:09:20.360 through Egypt, through north Africa, and into Spain. 0:09:20.360,0:09:25.331 And then they all melted together in central Mexico. 0:09:25.331,0:09:27.567 America is not the United States. 0:09:27.567,0:09:30.203 America is the entire continent. 0:09:30.203,0:09:35.342 But we think here, or Americans here think that America means just this country. 0:09:35.342,0:09:37.844 And so I feel like I have, you know, 0:09:37.844,0:09:39.413 I've been in kind of... 0:09:40.105,0:09:42.749 I don't want to say "I have...", 0:09:42.749,0:09:44.351 cause I don't feel it like that, 0:09:44.351,0:09:49.756 but my people, the people that I come from, 0:09:49.756,0:09:52.725 have been sort of robbed of that term. 0:09:52.725,0:09:54.327 We're not Americans, 0:09:54.327,0:09:59.132 even though WE ARE, [voice cracking] 0:10:00.194,0:10:05.906 and, I don't know where that came from. 0:10:05.906,0:10:07.441 I don't know where that came from, 0:10:07.441,0:10:20.320 but, um, you know, when you say you know "I wish you would be American, 0:10:20.320,0:10:22.689 or you would all agree to be American", 0:10:22.689,0:10:27.393 you know what, what is presented to me as an American, 0:10:27.393,0:10:29.362 does not look like me, 0:10:29.362,0:10:31.097 does not think like me, 0:10:31.097,0:10:33.299 does not smell like me, 0:10:33.299,0:10:34.968 does not cry like me, 0:10:34.968,0:10:37.571 does not play like me. 0:10:37.571,0:10:38.939 So for me to say that, 0:10:38.939,0:10:40.974 to use that as my primary identification, 0:10:40.974,0:10:43.610 for me, it means to deny 0:10:43.610,0:10:46.503 all, nearly all of me. 0:10:48.742,0:10:50.851 I worked in corporate America for awhile, 0:10:50.851,0:10:53.987 and now when I see guys walkin' down the street in a suit and tie, 0:10:53.987,0:10:59.159 I'm like whew, I bet he can't wait to go home and become a black man again. 0:10:59.159,0:11:01.594 You know? 0:11:01.594,0:11:04.903 Because you're not allowed to be a black man in corporate America. 0:11:04.903,0:11:06.715 Walk through some halls with some pride, 0:11:06.715,0:11:08.402 you're gonna scare some people. 0:11:08.402,0:11:09.636 Show that you have some intelligence, 0:11:09.636,0:11:12.172 you scare people. 0:11:12.172,0:11:13.473 You gotta shuffle. 0:11:13.473,0:11:16.328 It's a 1993 shuffle, but it's still a shuffle. 0:11:17.077,0:11:20.380 You give us a hard time for being white, 0:11:20.380,0:11:21.214 and being American, 0:11:21.214,0:11:23.149 and being in control. 0:11:23.149,0:11:26.052 I've never felt in control. 0:11:26.052,0:11:30.123 I had vineyards, and pear orchards for many years, 0:11:30.123,0:11:32.959 and I employed many of your people, 0:11:32.959,0:11:34.227 if you wish to call them that, 0:11:34.227,0:11:35.295 they're my dear friends, 0:11:35.295,0:11:37.030 to me they are friends, 0:11:37.030,0:11:40.600 equal to any that I would have. 0:11:43.837,0:11:45.639 And I greet them, 0:11:45.639,0:11:49.725 and now they come into my business and they just want to come in and say hi and talk to me. 0:11:50.711,0:11:52.708 There is something different that's happened. 0:11:53.665,0:11:56.649 What's different that's happened for us, 0:11:56.649,0:11:58.952 and I'm speaking as a people, 0:11:59.875,0:12:02.388 borders on genocide, 0:12:02.388,0:12:04.090 takeover, 0:12:04.090,0:12:05.091 colonization, 0:12:05.091,0:12:07.227 you know what happenes to me when I pass a mission? 0:12:07.227,0:12:09.130 Yknow? 0:12:09.130,0:12:12.532 Not the same thing that happens to every group that passes a mission. 0:12:12.532,0:12:14.401 There's something different. 0:12:14.401,0:12:18.002 When I hear Father Junipero Serra, what do you think I think of? 0:12:18.002,0:12:18.696 You know? 0:12:18.696,0:12:19.831 It's not... 0:12:19.831,0:12:22.700 it's chopping off hands, 0:12:22.700,0:12:24.068 it's slavery, 0:12:24.068,0:12:26.737 I mean, you know, that's what's different, 0:12:26.737,0:12:32.276 and it gets tiring to not have that difference known. 0:12:32.276,0:12:36.347 It gets tiring to not have that difference acknowledged, 0:12:36.347,0:12:39.149 and to have to keep talking about it. 0:12:39.149,0:12:41.786 That's what gets tiring. 0:12:41.786,0:12:49.761 So I see here an attitude expressed by Yutaka and by Roberto 0:12:49.761,0:12:53.364 that says how can I be an American? I can't. 0:12:53.364,0:12:55.333 And so I won't. 0:12:55.333,0:12:59.671 I'm going to cling to my heritage. 0:12:59.671,0:13:01.839 Is this clinging the problem? 0:13:01.839,0:13:05.743 Is this belief that you cannot become American the problem? 0:13:05.743,0:13:10.848 For years, I've said why do these guys have such a problem being a colour? 0:13:10.848,0:13:12.650 Why can't they just be individuals? 0:13:12.650,0:13:15.219 And go out and make a place for themselves? 0:13:15.219,0:13:19.657 And I hear you saying that we whites don't allow that. 0:13:19.657,0:13:22.693 That we keep you down, 0:13:22.693,0:13:24.191 why aren't we just humans? 0:13:24.191,0:13:26.397 I mean, why aren't we just... brothers? 0:13:26.397,0:13:34.038 There's a certain um, um, sort of, silent consciousness 0:13:34.038,0:13:36.940 about what it mean to be American, 0:13:36.940,0:13:40.711 that I sense coming from, uh. white folks, 0:13:40.711,0:13:42.146 that I'd like to talk about. 0:13:42.146,0:13:43.915 But before I do that, 0:13:43.915,0:13:47.485 I'd like to say one more thing that's tired about talking about racism, 0:13:47.485,0:13:50.288 and that is that, uh, you know, 0:13:50.288,0:13:52.757 people of colour are spilling their guts, 0:13:52.757,0:13:57.628 and "doing education" uh, to white people. 0:13:57.628,0:13:59.563 "Let me explain to you how you got this wrong... 0:13:59.563,0:14:01.265 let me explain to you how you got that wrong... 0:14:01.265,0:14:02.533 let me explain..." 0:14:02.533,0:14:04.435 and then we get cross-examined, 0:14:04.435,0:14:08.038 and it's like "well, maybe you're problem is ... bababababa???" 0:14:08.038,0:14:12.376 And it's always, you know, racism gets looked at as a person of colour's problem, 0:14:12.376,0:14:14.345 and it's not. 0:14:14.345,0:14:16.047 You know, we're like on the receiving end of the problem, 0:14:16.047,0:14:17.582 but we are not the problem. 0:14:17.582,0:14:20.184 Y'know, I walk in a world where, uh, 0:14:20.184,0:14:25.022 where black people, where Latinos, where Asians, where Arabs, 0:14:25.022,0:14:31.662 all these different people are... experienced as problem people, 0:14:31.662,0:14:35.332 and that "well, we're gonna deal with the...with the person of colour problem..." 0:14:35.332,0:14:40.337 when in fact, uh, racism is essentially a white problem. 0:14:40.337,0:14:44.141 And that for you to understand what racism is about, 0:14:44.141,0:14:46.277 you're gonna be so uncomfortable, 0:14:46.277,0:14:49.447 you're gonna be so different from who you see yourself to be now, 0:14:49.447,0:14:54.352 that uh, you know, there's just no way for you to get it from where you're sitting. 0:14:54.352,0:14:56.328 And I'm not saying that you could not ever get it, 0:14:56.328,0:14:59.590 I mean that you need to step outside of your skin, 0:14:59.590,9:59:59.000 and step out...