9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 It was the gay pride parade today in New York, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 which capped a great month of significant advances for marriage equality in America. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [The white house is granting new benefits to same sex couples, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 including those who live in states where gay marriage is against the law] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [To date, nineteen states in the district of Columbia have legalised marriage equality and the momentum continues] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 That's right, we are nearly half way to full nationwide marriage equality, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 which means it's about to become a question of which state is going to be last. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Who could it possibly be, Mississippi? 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 We don't know. We don't know, Mississippi. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 It could be anyone, Mississippi. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Now, I know it's a little premature, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 but I do think this might be one of those moments where we're allowed to feel great about this country. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Marriage equality is sweeping the nation and America did it! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Strike up the band! Bring out the rock and roll George Washington! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 and the Americake(?) 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Yes! I see no reason why this feeling is ever going to end! It's fantastic! Yes! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 OK, OK, OK! hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on... 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 because unfortunately this month has also brought less good news from other countries. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [There's great controversy over the new UN General Assembly president, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Uganda's Sam Kutesa's been elected to the largely ceremonial role. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 But thousands have signed a petition against the appointment because of Uganda's harsh laws on homosexuality] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Yeah, calling Uganda’s laws ‘harsh’ doesn’t really do them justice. That’s like calling Stalin ‘a bit of a grump'. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Or the Triangle Shirtwaist factory fire a ‘whoopsie-doo’. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Or the Titanic a ‘disappointing vacation.’ 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Because.. let's take a moment to remind ourselves about what Uganda's laws actually contain. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [On Monday, the president of Uganda signed a sweeping anti-gay bill into law. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 It makes it illegal simply to be gay in the country and imposes harsh prison sentences for offenders.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 So the moral arc of the universe is long and it bends away from Uganda. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 And the law isn't just putting gays at risk at imprisonment. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Since it passed the Ugandan legislature, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 the number of recorded acts of persecution has increased between 750% and 1900% from previous years. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 It’s gotten to the point where people from the dark ages could build a time machine, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 travel to 2014 Uganda, step outside and go "Ah shit, it didn’t work. OK, nice try, get back in." 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Now, you might wonder: how can the UN allow a representative of the Ugandan government, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 which has also been accused of corruption and the brutal suppression of dissent, to be in charge of their General Assembly. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [Sam Kutesa is chosen without a vote. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 The selection is done on geographical rotation and African countries had already agreed he'd be their candidate.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Oh that's fine then! So it's just their turn! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Essentially, the UN apparently works according to the same principle as family movie night, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 where even if your little sister picks 'My little pony friendship is magic princess twighlight sparkle' for the third time, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 ya have to watch it cos it's her f***ing turn. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 The fact that, in the twenty first century, 81 countries have laws outlawing homosexuality is incredibly depressing. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Although, in a way, it shows how lucky we are to live here. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Because remember, when it comes to advances in marriage equality, America did it! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Am I right, cheerleaders?! Yes? 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 It's never gonna blow up in our face. USA! USA! USA! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 OK, OK, ah.. This feels so good. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 I mean, just out of interest, where did Uganda get the idea to come up with such hateful laws? 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [Uganda has had laws against homosexuality for virtually all the past century. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 They were introduced in the old British colonial days.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Whoopsie-daisy. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 I've gotta be honest, being British is sometimes a little like being an alcoholic. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 When someone says you did something awful, you find yourself going 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 "Honestly, I don't even remember doing that, but yeah, probably, probably. I'm a dick, I'm a dick. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 What'd you want me to say?" 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 OK, so fundamentally, it's the British people's fault. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 But, you know, I live in America now, so I've still got a pretty warm feeling inside me, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 unless.. someone is about to take that away from me. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [The irony, gay rights activists say, is that it was a small group of American Evangelicals, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 who came to Uganda speaking out against homosexuality, which was already illegal, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 that really took the persecution of the LGBT community to a new level.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Wait.. so.. what you're essentially saying is, America did this.. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 No! No! No! Get back in that cake! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Get back in that cake! Get outta here! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 All of you, get out of here and think about what you've done! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Shame on you! Shame on you! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Shame on you! Shame on you! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 OK, OK, so. Turns out, American anti-gay activists were in Uganda in the run up to the passage of the law. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 And let's meet just one of them: Scott Lively. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Now, if that name rings a bell, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 you may know him as one of those far right Christians who go on TV and say things like this.. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [I think Mr. Obama may well be homosexual himself.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Hey, hey, hey, hey. That's clearly wrong. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 It's not Mr. Obama, it's President Obama. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 President Obama is a homosexual, get it right! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Have some respect. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Now, if you live in Massachusetts, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 you may also know Scott Lively as that crazy guy currently running for governor, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 who's attempting to take back the rainbow as a symbol from the gays by promoting this song. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [The rainbow belongs to God, untouched by evil desires] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Wow, wow! I feel like if Kermit ever hear that song, he would immediately insist on one fewer songs about rainbows. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Look, Scott Lively is clearly an idiot, and luckily, over here we just get to laugh at him. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [You're never gonna stop AIDS until you stop treating homosexual sodomy as a civil right 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 and start treating it as a form of conduct to avoid] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [Laughter] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 The guy's material is killing out there. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Hey, what's up with how HIV's only transmittable between homosexuals, huh? 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Is this on, huh? This guy knows what I'm talking about. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Unfortunately though, in Uganda, it is a very different story. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [In America, he's a nobody. But in Africa, this extremist guy becomes the spokesperson 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 and he's able to address the entire parliament for five hours.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 I don’t know what is more shocking here: 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 that he addressed the parliament at all or that he did it for five hours. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Because, listen, if your hard-on for homophobia lasts five hours, you need to seek medical attention. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 And he didn't just stop there. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Scott Lively spoke on Ugandan TV and gave seminars attended by Ugandan government officials. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 And here is where Scott Lively is about to get considerably less funny. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [Increasingly, lesbians are being molested by other women. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 It's actually becoming more and more common in the United States.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [How dare you say that homosexuality and pedophilia are equated? Well, they are equated.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [They have very little sense of mercy.. The Rwandan stuff probably involved these guys.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [These were the Nazis. The Nazis.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 It’s like he ate the most offensive package of magnetic poetry and then vomited it all over his audience. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 And then later that year, Uganda's homosexuality bill was introduced 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 and, for the record, Lively says he doesn't approve of it and disclaims any influence over it. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [I do not support, and never did support, the harsh penalties in terms of long prison sentences. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 I don't believe in that, I never have.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Oh no, no, of course not. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 You were simply saying "Look guys, gay people are dangerous insidious Nazis.. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 do with that information what you will. Lively out. Lively out." 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Why back off now Scott? Own it! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 If God hates gays as much as you think he does, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 He's gonna be pretty pissed at you for not seeing this thing through! 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 And it's not just Scott Lively, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 one of Ugandan's most prominent anti-gay preachers is a pastor named Martin Ssempa. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Let's listen in on one of his lovely sermons. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [Do you know what they're doing in their bedroom? 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 I did research and I gathered their information. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Now they start off by touching each other's genitals and smelling each other..] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 I've gotta say, for an anti-gay pastor, that man clearly has very quick access to a lot of fetish porn. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Very very swift, just "Oh, there we go!" 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Now, Martin Ssempa is not American. He has in the past, however, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 received funding from teh Canyon Ridge Christian church in Las Vegas and the US government 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 which allocated his organization $40,000 for abstinence education, 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 which he presumably responsibly spent on gay porn to show during sermons. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 But if you want a single sound-bite 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 that sums up the depressing scale of the American cultural influence on Ugandan homophobia, it is this.. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 [In the beginning, it was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.] 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Yeah, that's not a Ugandan saying. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 Let me give you three names that are not especially common in Africa: Adam, Eve and Steve. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 So clearly U.S. groups recognized the market for homophobia stateside was dwindling and so tried to sell it somewhere else, meaning that Africa isn't just where we send our losing team's Super Bowl shirts, it's also where we now send our losing political philosophies. 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000 9:59:59.000,9:59:59.000