[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:00.100,0:00:03.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,OK, I have a question for all of us.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:03.10,0:00:04.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You ready?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:05.05,0:00:07.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is all winning success?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:07.27,0:00:08.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Murmurs)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:08.68,0:00:09.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:10.40,0:00:12.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:12.23,0:00:13.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Whoa. OK.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:14.54,0:00:17.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I am the recently retired head coach
Dialogue: 0,0:00:17.12,0:00:19.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of the UCLA Women's Gymnastics Team,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.90,0:00:22.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a position that I held for 29 years.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:22.24,0:00:23.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:23.84,0:00:24.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.02,0:00:27.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And during my tenure,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:27.25,0:00:29.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I experienced a lot of winning.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.48,0:00:32.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I led our team to seven\NNational Championships,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:32.26,0:00:35.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was inducted into\Nthe UCLA Athletic Hall of Fame
Dialogue: 0,0:00:35.41,0:00:38.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I was even voted\Nthe Coach of the Century
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.14,0:00:39.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by the Pac-12 Conference.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:39.63,0:00:41.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:42.01,0:00:45.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Winning is really, really,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:45.74,0:00:47.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like, really, really fun.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.82,0:00:50.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:50.10,0:00:52.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But I am here to share my insight:
Dialogue: 0,0:00:52.66,0:00:54.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,winning does not always equal success.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:55.76,0:00:58.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All across America and around the world,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:58.76,0:01:00.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we have a crisis
Dialogue: 0,0:01:00.81,0:01:03.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in the win-at-all-cost cultures
Dialogue: 0,0:01:03.51,0:01:05.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that we have created.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:06.27,0:01:07.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In our schools,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:07.74,0:01:10.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in our businesses, in politics,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:10.49,0:01:13.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,winning at all cost\Nhas become acceptable.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:15.01,0:01:16.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As a society,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:16.93,0:01:19.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we honor the people\Nat the top of the pyramid.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:19.69,0:01:26.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We effusively applaud those people who win\Nchampionships and elections and awards.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.28,0:01:29.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But sadly, quite often,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:29.27,0:01:32.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,those same people\Nare leaving their institutions
Dialogue: 0,0:01:32.98,0:01:35.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as damaged human beings.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.31,0:01:38.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sadly, with straight A's,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:38.41,0:01:40.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,kids are leaving school damaged.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:42.29,0:01:43.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,With awards and medals,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.65,0:01:49.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,athletes often leave their teams damaged,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:49.70,0:01:52.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,emotionally, mentally,\Nnot just physically.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:52.99,0:01:57.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And with huge profits, employees\Noften leave their companies damaged.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:58.81,0:02:03.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We have become so hyperfocused\Non that end result,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:03.50,0:02:05.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when the end result is a win,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:07.51,0:02:10.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the human component of how we got there
Dialogue: 0,0:02:10.42,0:02:13.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,often gets swept under the proverbial rug,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:13.67,0:02:15.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and so does the damage.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:16.65,0:02:18.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I'm calling for a time-out.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:18.99,0:02:20.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Time-out.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:20.88,0:02:22.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We need to redefine success.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:23.97,0:02:30.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Real success is developing\Nchampions in life for our world,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:30.80,0:02:33.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,win or lose.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:35.07,0:02:39.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:40.10,0:02:43.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Real success is developing\Nchampions in life,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.56,0:02:45.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not for your team,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.06,0:02:47.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not for your business
Dialogue: 0,0:02:47.46,0:02:51.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and, I'm sad to tell you, not even\Nfor your Christmas card bragging rights.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.37,0:02:53.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sorry.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:53.88,0:02:55.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So how do we do this?
Dialogue: 0,0:02:55.98,0:03:00.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,First of all, you may be able\Nto dictate your way to a win,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:00.48,0:03:03.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but you can't dictate your way to success.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:04.78,0:03:08.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let me take you back to 1990,\Nwhen I was first appointed the head coach
Dialogue: 0,0:03:08.55,0:03:10.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of the UCLA Women's Gymnastics Team.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:11.27,0:03:15.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I would like to share with you\Nthat I've never done gymnastics.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:15.20,0:03:17.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I grew up in the world of ballet.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:17.20,0:03:20.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have never done a cartwheel,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:20.06,0:03:22.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I couldn't teach you\Nhow to do a proper cartwheel.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:22.98,0:03:24.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:24.05,0:03:25.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's sadly true.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:25.36,0:03:30.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I knew nothing about\Nhow to develop a team culture.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:31.28,0:03:35.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The best I could do was mimic\Nother coaches who had won.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:35.73,0:03:37.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so I became tough-talking,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:37.83,0:03:40.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,tough-minded, relentless,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:41.22,0:03:42.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,unsympathetic,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:42.94,0:03:45.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,bullish, unempathetic
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.49,0:03:48.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and oftentimes downright mean.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:50.34,0:03:53.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I acted like a head coach
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.67,0:03:56.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,whose only thought\Nwas to figure out how to win.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:59.55,0:04:01.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My first few seasons as a head coach
Dialogue: 0,0:04:01.44,0:04:02.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,were abysmal,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:02.89,0:04:06.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after putting up with\Nmy brash coaching style for a few years,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:06.88,0:04:09.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,our team asked me for a team meeting.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:09.25,0:04:10.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, I love team meetings,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.59,0:04:12.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I said, "Yay!\NLet's have a team meeting."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:13.35,0:04:15.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And for two solid hours,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:15.89,0:04:21.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they gave me examples of how my arrogance\Nwas hurtful and demeaning.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.60,0:04:23.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, not yay.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:25.50,0:04:27.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They explained to me
Dialogue: 0,0:04:27.20,0:04:29.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that they wanted to be supported,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:29.32,0:04:30.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not belittled.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:30.77,0:04:33.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They wanted to be\Ncoached up, not torn down.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.40,0:04:35.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They wanted to be motivated,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:36.01,0:04:38.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not pressured or bullied.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:39.48,0:04:41.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That was my time-out,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:42.24,0:04:43.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I chose to change.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:45.69,0:04:48.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Being a dogmatic dictator
Dialogue: 0,0:04:48.97,0:04:52.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,may produce compliant,\Ngood little soldiers,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:52.55,0:04:55.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but it doesn't develop champions in life.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:56.28,0:05:00.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It is so much easier, in any walk of life,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:00.47,0:05:02.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to dictate and give orders
Dialogue: 0,0:05:02.95,0:05:06.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,than to actually figure out\Nhow to motivate someone
Dialogue: 0,0:05:07.02,0:05:08.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to want to be better.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:08.81,0:05:11.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the reason is -- we all know this --
Dialogue: 0,0:05:11.05,0:05:13.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,motivation takes a really long time
Dialogue: 0,0:05:13.75,0:05:15.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to take root.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:15.59,0:05:17.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But when it does,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:17.84,0:05:19.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it is character-building
Dialogue: 0,0:05:19.89,0:05:21.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and life-altering.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:22.46,0:05:27.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I realized that I needed\Nto fortify our student-athletes
Dialogue: 0,0:05:27.15,0:05:29.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as whole human beings,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:30.12,0:05:31.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not just athletes who won.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:32.36,0:05:34.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So success for me shifted
Dialogue: 0,0:05:34.94,0:05:37.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from only focusing on winning
Dialogue: 0,0:05:37.51,0:05:40.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to developing my coaching philosophy,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:40.22,0:05:44.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is developing champions\Nin life through sport.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:45.87,0:05:47.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I knew if I did this well enough,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:47.89,0:05:51.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that champion mentality would translate\Nto the competition floor.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:52.23,0:05:53.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it did.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:54.34,0:05:57.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The key ingredient was to develop trust
Dialogue: 0,0:05:58.44,0:05:59.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,through patience,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:00.52,0:06:02.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,respectful honesty
Dialogue: 0,0:06:03.56,0:06:05.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and accountability --
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.19,0:06:09.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all of the ingredients\Nthat go into tough love.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:10.82,0:06:12.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Speaking of tough love,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:12.78,0:06:15.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Katelyn Ohashi is\Na perfect example of this.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:15.68,0:06:18.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You may have all seen her floor routine.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.25,0:06:22.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It has had over 150 million views.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:22.78,0:06:26.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And the consensus is,\Nher performance is pure joy.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:27.43,0:06:32.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,However, when Katelyn came to UCLA,\Nshe was broken in body, mind and spirit.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:33.69,0:06:39.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She had grown up in a stereotypical,\Nvery high-level athletic world,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:40.05,0:06:41.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she was damaged.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:42.64,0:06:45.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So when Katelyn came\Nto UCLA her freshman year,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:45.72,0:06:49.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she found her inner rebel quite well,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:50.08,0:06:52.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to the point where she was\Nno longer able to do gymnastics
Dialogue: 0,0:06:52.93,0:06:54.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at the level at which she was recruited.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.43,0:06:57.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I will never forget
Dialogue: 0,0:06:57.54,0:07:00.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a team meeting we had\Nhalfway through her freshman season.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:00.83,0:07:04.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We were in there with the team,\Nthe coaching staff, the support staff,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:04.17,0:07:05.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sports psychologist,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:05.72,0:07:11.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and Katelyn very clearly\Nand unapologetically said,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:12.21,0:07:14.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I just don't want to be great again."
Dialogue: 0,0:07:16.52,0:07:18.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt like I got sucker punched.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:19.81,0:07:22.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My first thought was,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.22,0:07:25.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Then why the heck am I\Ngoing to honor your scholarship?"
Dialogue: 0,0:07:27.39,0:07:30.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was a really snarky thought,\Nand thankfully I didn't say it out loud,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:30.88,0:07:33.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because then I had clarity.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:34.45,0:07:36.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Katelyn didn't hate gymnastics.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:37.36,0:07:40.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Katelyn hated everything\Nassociated with being great.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:41.48,0:07:43.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Katelyn didn't want to be a winner,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:43.94,0:07:48.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because winning at all cost\Nhad cost her her joy.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:49.80,0:07:53.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My job was to figure out\Nhow to motivate her
Dialogue: 0,0:07:53.85,0:07:55.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to want to be great again,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:56.74,0:07:59.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by helping her redefine success.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:02.60,0:08:06.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My enthusiasm for that challenge\Nturned into determination
Dialogue: 0,0:08:06.49,0:08:09.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when one day Katelyn\Nlooked me in the eye and said,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:09.56,0:08:11.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Ms. Val, I just want you to know,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:11.90,0:08:14.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,everything you tell me to do,\NI do the exact opposite."
Dialogue: 0,0:08:14.90,0:08:17.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:17.58,0:08:20.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yeah, it was like, yeah, Katelyn,\Nchallenge accepted. OK.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:20.82,0:08:22.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:22.98,0:08:26.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And further proof that dictating\Nwas not going to win.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:27.11,0:08:30.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So I embarked on\Nthe painfully slow process
Dialogue: 0,0:08:30.40,0:08:32.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of building trust
Dialogue: 0,0:08:32.15,0:08:34.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and proving to her that first and foremost
Dialogue: 0,0:08:34.77,0:08:38.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I cared about her as a whole human being.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:40.93,0:08:44.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Part of my strategy was to only talk\Nto Katelyn about gymnastics in the gym.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:45.96,0:08:48.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Outside of the gym,\Nwe talked about everything else:
Dialogue: 0,0:08:48.46,0:08:50.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,school, boys, families,\Nfriends, hobbies.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:51.01,0:08:55.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I encouraged her to find things\Noutside of her sport that brought her joy.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:56.20,0:08:58.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it was so cool
Dialogue: 0,0:08:59.01,0:09:05.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to see the process of Katelyn Ohashi\Nliterally blossom before our eyes.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:05.51,0:09:07.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And through that process,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:08.36,0:09:11.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she rediscovered her self-love
Dialogue: 0,0:09:11.61,0:09:13.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and self-worth.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:14.70,0:09:18.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And slowly, she was able to bring that joy
Dialogue: 0,0:09:19.42,0:09:21.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,back to her gymnastics.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:22.51,0:09:26.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She went on to earn\Nthe NCAA title on floor,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:26.85,0:09:31.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and she helped our team win\Nour seventh NCAA championship in 2018.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:32.68,0:09:33.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So --
Dialogue: 0,0:09:33.80,0:09:34.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:34.76,0:09:36.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:09:38.68,0:09:42.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So let's think about\Nthe Katelyn Ohashis in your life.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:43.29,0:09:46.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Let's think about those people\Nunder your care and your guidance.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:48.12,0:09:51.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,What are you telling your kids\Non the car ride home?
Dialogue: 0,0:09:53.43,0:09:54.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That car ride home
Dialogue: 0,0:09:54.81,0:09:57.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,has much more impact than you know.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:00.18,0:10:02.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Are you focusing on the end result,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:02.93,0:10:04.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or are you excited to use that time
Dialogue: 0,0:10:04.66,0:10:06.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to help your child\Ndevelop into a champion?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:07.77,0:10:08.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's very simple:
Dialogue: 0,0:10:09.01,0:10:11.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you will know you're focusing\Non the end result
Dialogue: 0,0:10:11.39,0:10:13.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if you ask questions about the end result.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:14.23,0:10:15.43,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Did you win?"
Dialogue: 0,0:10:16.14,0:10:17.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"How many points did you score?"
Dialogue: 0,0:10:18.40,0:10:19.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Did you get an A?"
Dialogue: 0,0:10:21.89,0:10:27.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you truly are motivated about helping\Nyour child develop into a champion,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:27.63,0:10:30.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you will ask questions\Nabout the experience
Dialogue: 0,0:10:30.73,0:10:32.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the process,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:32.07,0:10:34.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like, "What did you learn today?"
Dialogue: 0,0:10:35.07,0:10:36.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Did you help a teammate?"
Dialogue: 0,0:10:37.52,0:10:39.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, my favorite question,
Dialogue: 0,0:10:39.53,0:10:42.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Did you figure out how to have fun\Nat working really, really hard?"
Dialogue: 0,0:10:45.02,0:10:48.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then the key is to be very still
Dialogue: 0,0:10:48.61,0:10:50.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and listen to their response.
Dialogue: 0,0:10:52.50,0:10:57.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I believe that one of the greatest gifts\Nwe can give another human being
Dialogue: 0,0:10:57.11,0:10:59.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is to silence our minds
Dialogue: 0,0:10:59.61,0:11:02.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from the need to be right
Dialogue: 0,0:11:02.15,0:11:05.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or the need to formulate\Nthe appropriate response
Dialogue: 0,0:11:05.17,0:11:06.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and truly listen
Dialogue: 0,0:11:06.76,0:11:08.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when someone else is talking.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:09.52,0:11:12.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And in silencing our minds,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:12.37,0:11:16.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we actually hear our own fears\Nand inadequacies,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:16.68,0:11:20.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which can help us formulate our response
Dialogue: 0,0:11:20.18,0:11:23.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with more clarity and empathy.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:26.22,0:11:28.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Kyla Ross, another one of our gymnasts,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:28.13,0:11:30.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is one of the greatest gymnasts\Nin the history of the sport.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:30.99,0:11:33.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She's the only athlete\Nto have earned the trifecta:
Dialogue: 0,0:11:34.36,0:11:36.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,she's a national champion,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:36.38,0:11:37.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a world champion
Dialogue: 0,0:11:38.00,0:11:39.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and an Olympic champion.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:40.46,0:11:42.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She's also not one for small talk,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:42.86,0:11:45.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I was a bit surprised one day\Nwhen she came to my office,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:45.76,0:11:47.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,sat on the couch
Dialogue: 0,0:11:47.10,0:11:49.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and just started talking --
Dialogue: 0,0:11:49.44,0:11:51.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,first about her major,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:51.17,0:11:52.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then about graduate school
Dialogue: 0,0:11:52.76,0:11:56.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then about everything else\Nthat seemed to pop into her mind.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:57.19,0:12:00.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My inner voice whispered to me
Dialogue: 0,0:12:00.58,0:12:02.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that something was on her mind,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:02.67,0:12:04.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and if I was still
Dialogue: 0,0:12:04.74,0:12:07.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and gave her enough time,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:07.19,0:12:08.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it would come out.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:10.10,0:12:11.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it did.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:12.88,0:12:16.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It was the first time that Kyla\Nhad shared with anyone
Dialogue: 0,0:12:17.74,0:12:20.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that she had been\Nsexually abused by Larry Nassar,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:22.10,0:12:24.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the former USA Gymnastics team doctor,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:24.55,0:12:28.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who was later convicted\Nof being a serial child molester.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:31.76,0:12:33.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Kyla came forward
Dialogue: 0,0:12:33.82,0:12:35.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and joined the army
Dialogue: 0,0:12:35.72,0:12:37.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of Nassar survivors
Dialogue: 0,0:12:38.44,0:12:40.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who shared their stories
Dialogue: 0,0:12:40.69,0:12:42.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and used their voices
Dialogue: 0,0:12:43.19,0:12:46.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to invoke positive change for our world.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:50.07,0:12:53.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt it was extremely\Nimportant at that time
Dialogue: 0,0:12:53.06,0:12:55.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to provide a safe space\Nfor Kyla and our team.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:56.93,0:13:00.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so I chose to talk about this\Nin a few team meetings.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:03.90,0:13:06.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Later that year, we won\Nthe national championship,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:06.72,0:13:09.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and after we did, Kyla came up to me\Nand shared with me the fact
Dialogue: 0,0:13:09.96,0:13:12.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that she felt one reason that we'd won
Dialogue: 0,0:13:12.84,0:13:15.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,was because we had addressed\Nthe elephant in the room,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:16.46,0:13:20.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the tragedy that had\Nnot only rocked the world
Dialogue: 0,0:13:20.18,0:13:25.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that had liberated the truths\Nand the memories in herself
Dialogue: 0,0:13:25.09,0:13:27.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and in so many of her friends
Dialogue: 0,0:13:27.33,0:13:29.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and her peers.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:31.02,0:13:32.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As Kyla said,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:32.77,0:13:36.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Ms. Val, I literally felt myself\Nwalk taller as the season went on,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:37.61,0:13:41.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and when I walked onto that\Nchampionship floor, I felt invincible."
Dialogue: 0,0:13:41.40,0:13:42.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Simply --
Dialogue: 0,0:13:49.16,0:13:56.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:14:01.11,0:14:03.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Simply because she had been heard.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:05.93,0:14:09.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,As parents, as coaches,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:09.16,0:14:10.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as leaders,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:10.95,0:14:13.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,we can no longer lead from a place
Dialogue: 0,0:14:15.18,0:14:19.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where winning is\Nour only metric of success,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:19.50,0:14:22.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where our ego sits center stage,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:22.65,0:14:24.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because it has been proven
Dialogue: 0,0:14:24.28,0:14:27.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that that process produces\Nbroken human beings.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:28.42,0:14:30.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I emphatically know
Dialogue: 0,0:14:30.80,0:14:33.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that it is absolutely possible
Dialogue: 0,0:14:33.39,0:14:35.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to produce and train champions in life
Dialogue: 0,0:14:35.69,0:14:38.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in every single walk of life
Dialogue: 0,0:14:38.76,0:14:42.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,without compromising the human spirit.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:43.90,0:14:48.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:14:50.98,0:14:54.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It starts with defining success
Dialogue: 0,0:14:54.46,0:14:57.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for yourself and those under your care
Dialogue: 0,0:14:59.08,0:15:01.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then consistently
Dialogue: 0,0:15:01.65,0:15:06.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,self-examining whether your actions\Nare in alignment with your goals.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:08.79,0:15:11.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We are all coaches in some capacity.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:12.99,0:15:16.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We all have a collective responsibility
Dialogue: 0,0:15:16.80,0:15:21.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to develop champions\Nin life for our world.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:21.72,0:15:24.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That is what real success looks like,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:25.59,0:15:27.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and in the world of athletics,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:28.23,0:15:30.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that is what we call a win-win.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:31.29,0:15:32.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:32.48,0:15:35.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)