WEBVTT

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I'm big Ben Franklin

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and this shant be pretty

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let me instruct you how we battle

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in the city of Philly

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you couldn't sell Rick James

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a bag of crack

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you're out of practice

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my victory's more certain

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than death or taxes

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fact is

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you're a hack

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wack QVC joke

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you peddle soap

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that cleans bird shit

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from my windows

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I'll craft a lyrical coffin

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and then spit the nails in

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call my Arthur Miller son

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cause it's death of a salesman

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Hi Billy Mays here

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with a special TV offer

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watch me crush this

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bald fat foppish founding father

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I'll take my awesome auger

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and sow your quaker oats

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I'll shoot your rhymes down

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like a regiment of red coats

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I'm the lord of the pitch

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and leader in home sales

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you're just a lumpy pumpkin

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who invented the mail

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Benny's got kite'n key

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but you're in for a shock

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when I strike you with bolts

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from my lightning rod cock

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Stop

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I protest these intolerable raps

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it takes just one easy payment

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for me to whoop your ass

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cause I'm mint

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I'm money

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I'm an educated gentleman

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so join or die Bill

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cause it's all about the Benjamin

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but wait, there's more...

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Is there anyone out there who can finish this battle?

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anyone?

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anyone?

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I can

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you following me camera guy?

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cause it's about to get furious

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you're gonna love my nuts

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until you're bi-focal-curious

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your boy George chopped down trees

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you couldn't break a piece of balsa

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slap chop your face

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make a double chin salsa

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your style is so broke

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they call you Poor Richard

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it's bad enough I gotta see you

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every time I tip a stripper

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Vince against a founding father

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is just too bad

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cause after this

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America is gonna lose a Dad

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Who won?

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Who's next?

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You decide