WEBVTT

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This is Nina Rodriguez' Facebook profile.

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This person had three different profiles

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and 890 kids between 9 and 13 years old
on their list of friends.

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These are parts of a chat
with one of those kids.

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This is an exact copy of the chat

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and it's part of the case file.

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This kid started sending private photos

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until his family noticed it.

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The police report and 
investigation lead to a house.

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This was the girl's bedroom.

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Nina Rodriguez was actually
a 24-year-old man,

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that used to do this with lots of kids.

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Micaela Ortega was 12

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when she went to meet her 
new Facebook girl friend

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of her same age.

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"Rochi de River," was her name.

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She actually met Jonathan Luna,
who was 26 years old,

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who, when he was finally caught,

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confessed that he killed her because
the girl didn't want to have sex with him.

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He had four Facebook profiles

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and 1,700 women on his contact list.

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90 percent of them 
were less than 13 years old.

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These are two different cases of grooming:

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an adult contacts a kid
through the Internet,

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and by manipulating or lying

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leads that kid to sexual fields.

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From talking about sex

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to sharing private photos,

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recording the kid using a webcam

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or arranging a meeting.

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This is grooming.

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This is happening and it's on the rise.

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The question is, "What will we do?"

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because, in the meantime, kids are alone.

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They finish dinner, go to their rooms,

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close the door,

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take their computer, their cell phones

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and get into a bar,

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into a club.

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Think for one second about 
what I've just said;

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they are in a place full of strangers

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in a uninhibited environment.

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Internet broke physical boundaries.

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When we are alone in our bedroom,

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and we go online,

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we're not really alone.

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There are two reasons why
we are not taking care of this

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or at least not in the right way.

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Firstly, we're sure that everything
that happens online is "virtual."

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In fact, we call it "the virtual world"!

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If you look it up,

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something virtual is
something that is not real

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and we use that word
to talk about the Internet;

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something not real.

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And that's the problem with grooming.

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It is real.

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Adults, perverts, use the Internet
to abuse boys and girls

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and take advantage of the fact
that the kids and their parents

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think that what happens there
actually doesn't happen.

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Some years ago, we founded a NGO, 
"Argentina Cibersegura"

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that works on bringing awareness
about online safety.

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On 2013, we attended meetings

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at the Chamber of Deputies

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to discuss a law about grooming.

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I remember that most people thought

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that grooming was just the previous step

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to arrange a meeting with 
the kids and have sex with them.

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But they didn't think about
what happened with kids

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that were exposed to talk about sex
with an adult, without knowing it,

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sharing private photos thinking 
only another kid will see them

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or even worse,

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exposing themselves 
using their web cam.

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Nobody saw this as raping.

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I'm sure lots of you find it weird to
think that one person can abuse another

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without physical contact.

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Our mindset is built this way.

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I know, because I used to think the same.

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I was just an information technician

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until this happened to me.

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By the end of 2011,

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in a little town in Buenos Aires,

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I heard about a case for the first time.

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After giving a talk,

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I met the parents of an 11-year-old girl
who had suffered grooming.

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An adult had manipulated her

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into masturbate in front of her web cam

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and had recorded her.

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And the video was on several websites.

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That day, her parents asked us, in tears,

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to tell them

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how to delete those videos 
from the Internet.

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That broke my heart,

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and changed me forever,

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being their last disappointment,
telling them it was too late.

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Once content is online,

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we've already lost control.

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Since that day, I think about that girl

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waking up in the morning, 
having breakfast with her family,

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which had seen the video,

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and then walking to school, meeting people

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that had seen her naked,

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arriving to school, playing with 
her friends, who had also seen her.

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That was her life.

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Exposed.

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Of course, nobody raped her body,

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but hasn't her sexuality been abused?

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We clearly use different standards 
to measure physical and digital things.

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And we get angry at social networks

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because being angry with ourselves

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is more painful and more sincere.

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And this takes us to another reason why
we don't take good care of this topic.

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We believe kids

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don't need our help,

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that they "know everything"
about technology.

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When I was a kid,

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my parents at some point started
letting me walk to school alone.

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After walking with them 
for many years,

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one day they talked to me,

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gave me the house keys

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and told me: "Be very careful with them, 
don't give them to anyone,

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take the road we showed you,
be at home at the time we said,

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cross the street at the corners 
and look both ways before you cross,

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and, no matter what, 
don't talk to strangers."

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I knew everything about walking,

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however, there was a responsible adult

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taking care of me.

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Knowing how to do something
is not the same

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as doing it safely.

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Imagine this situation:

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I'm 10 or 11 years old,
I wake up in the morning,

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my parents give me the keys and say:

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"Seba, now you can walk to school alone."

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And when I come back late,

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they say, "You should arrive
at the time we said."

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And two weeks later,

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they say, by the way, "You know what?

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You have to cross at the corners

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and look both ways before crossing."

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And two years later:

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"And also, don't talk to strangers."

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It sounds absurd, right?

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We have the same absurd behavior
in relation to technology.

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We give kids total access
and we see if one day,

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sooner or later,

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they learn how to take care of themselves.

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Doing something is not the same

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as doing it safely.

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When we talk to parents,

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they often say

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that they don't care about 
technology and social networks.

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I always ask them if they 
care about their kids.

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As adults, getting in touch or not 
with technology,

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means getting in touch or not 
with the kids.

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Internet is part of their lives.

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Technology makes us rethink the
relationship between adults and kids.

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Education was always based 
on two main concepts:

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experience and knowledge.

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How can we teach to be safe online

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when we don't have either?

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Today, as adults, we have to guide kids

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on fields that sometimes we don't know,

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and that are more friendly to them.

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It's impossible to find an answer

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without doing new and
uncomfortable things,

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things we're not used to.

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A lot of you may think it's easy for me,

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because I'm quite young,

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and it used to be like this.

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It used to.

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Until last year,

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when I felt the weight 
of my age on my shoulders

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the first time I opened Snapchat.

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(Laughter)

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(Applause)

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I didn't understand a thing!

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I found it unnecessary,

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useless, hard to understand;

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it looked like a camera!

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It didn't have a menu!

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It was the first time I felt
the gap that sometimes exists

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between kids and adults.

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But it was also an opportunity
to do the right thing

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and get out of my comfort zone.

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I felt I would never use Snapchat,

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but then I asked my teenage cousin,

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to show me how she used it.

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And also why she used it.

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What was fun about it?

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We had a really nice talk,

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she showed me her Snapchat
and talked about things,

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we got closer, we laughed.

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Today, I use it.

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(Laughter)

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I don't know if I do it right --

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but the most important thing is
that I know it and I understand it.

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The key was to overcome 
the first impression,

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and do something new;

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something new.

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Today, we have the chance
to create new conversations.

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Which is the last app you downloaded?

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Which social network do you use 
to contact your friends?

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Which kind of information do you share?

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Were you approached by any stranger?

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Could we have these talks
between kids and adults?

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We have to make ourselves do it.

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Today, lots of kids are listening to us.

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Sometimes when we go
to schools to give our talks,

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or through the social networks,
kids ask or tell us

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things they didn't tell
their parents or their teachers...

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They don't even know us.

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Those kids need to know

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which are the risks of being online,

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to take care of themselves

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but also that, as almost everything else,

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they can learn this from any adult.

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Online safety has to be a topic

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in every house and in every classroom.

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We did a survey this year that showed

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that 15 percent of schools said 
they knew cases of grooming

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inside the school.

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And this number is growing.

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Technology changed 
every aspect of our life,

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including the risks we face

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and how we take care of ourselves.

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Grooming shows us this 
in the most painful way,

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messing up with the kids.

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Are we going to do 
something to avoid this?

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The solution starts with 
something very easy:

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Talking about it.

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Thank you.

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(Applause)