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I've said it before and 
I'm gonna say it again,

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Everyone on this earth has needs.

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It doesn't matter whether you 
want to have needs or not,

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you have them.

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A need is something that 
is required in order to live,

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succeed or be happy.

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And here's the thing about needs:

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you can't unneed them.

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You can't decide that something 
you need is not required.

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You can't talk yourself out of it.

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Your one option, when it 
comes to having a need,

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is to meet it.

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How to Meet an Unmet Need

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But this is easier said than done.

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Why is it easier said than done?

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Because we so often 
have aspects of us

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that are standing in a way 
of having the need met.

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This is not natural.

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You are born understanding 
that your need will be met

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and that it will be easy.

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A baby is not born panicking 
that it will not get milk,

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or worrying about having 
its diaper change.

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To a baby, being cuddled is 
not an impossible dream.

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We learn through our trauma 
in our life experience,

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that our need will not be met,

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and worse than that,
that our needs are not OK.

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A common pattern that we have

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is we go to the places where 
our needs can't be met,

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in order to get our needs met.

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It's a little bit like going 
to an auto-repair shop

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when you wanna shop for food.

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Or it's the person who wants desperately

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to have a loving connective partnership

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and yet directly opts for partners

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who are unavailable, 
who are avoidant in nature.

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The primary need in all beings

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is the need for love.

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But what's standing in the way

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of us being able to get this need met?

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Oftentimes, it's thoughts like:

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"Love is not actually ever 
going to come to me."

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It's thoughts like:

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"Love is dangerous."

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If, in our life experience,

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we experience love in a 
context of ulterior motives,

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we develop a belief,

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that's embedded in our bodies,

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that says, that love cannot 
ever happen without a catch.

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Because of these types of barriers to love,

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we do not allow in the very thing 
we need and want so desperately.

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From this state, so often,

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we are the person who's 
starving for food,

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in a grocery store, convinced 
there's nothing to eat.

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The people in our 
life can see that

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they are giving us the very 
thing we need and want,

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but we can't take it in.

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We have to become 
aware of what we need.

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To do this, we have to 
be able to recognize,

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the feeling of dissatisfaction,

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craving, wanting, emptiness, desperation.

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For this very reason,

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if you're having a difficult time feeling,

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you obviously won't be able to feel

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when you feel those feelings.

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So the first step is to watch 
my video on YouTube titled:

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How to Feel

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Once you watch that video,

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and you start practicing how to feel,

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and you start to notice those sensations

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of craving, of wanting, 
of emptiness, of lack,

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you look to the opposite side of that

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for what it is that you're lacking,

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what it is that you're craving,

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what it is that you're wanting.

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Some of our needs are 
quite simple to meet.

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For most of us in the Western world,

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we don't fly into a frenzy 
when we feel hunger.

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Why? Because we know 
it's just as simple

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as going to a grocery store, 
or going to our own fridge.

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However, if you're raised 
in a Third World country,

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where it was difficult to find food,

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you can bet, that when you feel
that feeling of craving for food,

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it comes with a lot of resistance.

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Resistance because you don't believe

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that need will actually be met.

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Now, this is in the Western World,

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much different, when it 
comes to emotional needs.

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We live in a day and age

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where most of our emotional 
needs simply are not met.

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And so, when we feel 
an emotional need,

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we have the same reaction

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as somebody who would 
be starving for food.

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We are completely convinced

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that there's no way to 
get that need met.

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So we start to panic,

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we start to go into lack,

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we start to feel as if there is no way

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that we're going to be able to satisfy

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those negative feelings within us.

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We are not going to be able to go
in the direction of what we need.

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We don't even know how.

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I want you to understand that trauma,

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at its fundamental level,

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is the experience of 
lacking something

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that we need and want.

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Particularly when it applies 
to emotional needs.

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So, once you have identified 
what your unmet need is,

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that need you feel 
is difficult to fulfill,

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I want you to ask yourself 
the following question:

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"What would I have to 
give up in order to have ...?"

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fill in the blank with what you need.

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For example, for me 
to be able to feel love

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when I'm sitting in the
room with someone,

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I would have to give up my 
belief that love is dangerous.

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I would have to give up 
my constant thinking,

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because my mind brings 
me out of my body,

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so I can't feel connection to people 
as real people in the room.

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I would have to give up the story 
that I always lose what I love.

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I would have to give up 
sending text messages

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to that person who 
never sends any back.

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Keep in mind that, anywhere 
we have an identification,

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anywhere our identity is 
wrapped up in a state

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of being, or behaviour, or thought

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that causes one of our 
needs to not be met,

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we will have to come up against

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and let go of, our 
own sense of identity,

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which feels like a life 
and death choice,

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in order to meet that need.

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For example,

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let's say that you are 
the family scapegoat.

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If you are a family scapegoat,

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you grew up developing an identity

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that you are bad and wrong.

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You didn't want to be that way,

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but the ego (the ID),

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became attached to the concept 
of being bad and wrong.

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So let's say that you want love,

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love is a direct contradiction to shame,

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which is feeling like something 
about you is bad and wrong.

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So, when you go to get love,

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instantly your very ego is going 
to fight against that love,

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because it will perceive that 
love as a death of itself.

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The mental understanding of 
what you have to give up

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in order to get needs met 
and actions you can take,

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is absolutely no comparison,

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to the actual physical experience,

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of being able to feel 
that need being met.

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And you can actually do this.

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I'm gonna teach you how.

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For example,

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let's say that you want connection.

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Obviously, my best bet of 
getting this need met,

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is to find someone who 
also wants connection.

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So let's say I find that person,

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I sit down across them in a room.

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What I do is I focus all of my attention

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on them and only them.

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I feel myself open up to them 
on an energetic level.

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I may open up even verbally 
by talking to them,

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(If talking doesn't take 
me out of connection).

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And what I do is I watch the 
resistance that I have to that.

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I watch how my mind 
wants to take me away.

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I watch the thoughts 
that come in like:

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"This is not OK,

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the only reason that this 
person is here right now,

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is because of... 
some ulterior motive."

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You want to watch the 
ways that your own being

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resists the very thing you want.

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Stay with that resistance long enough

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that the resistance 
itself begins to settle,

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and you start to feel yourself go 
into more of a vulnerable state.

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Once you notice where in your 
body you can't feel connection,

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switch your focus to where in 
your body you can feel connection.

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Pay attention to your heart.

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Can you feel it there?

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If not, can you feel in your skin?

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If not, is there a part of your 
body like even your knee,

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where you can actually 
feel that connection?

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From there,

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you wanna bring that 
sensation of the connection,

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as far and deep into your body 
and through your whole body,

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as you possibly can.

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Or let's say that what 
you want is abundance.

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Go to a place that's super fancy,

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something that symbolizes 
wealth, for you.

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Sit there and try to feel like a king,

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try to feel like you own it,

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try to feel that sensation that 
you have so much money

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that you literally can't find 
enough stuff to spend it on.

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When you do this, I want you to watch

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the resistance that comes 
up in your body.

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What kind of thoughts 
are trying to tell you:

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"That this is not the case."

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"This is not what you deserve."
"This is not the reality."

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Anything that is getting in the way
of you actually having access

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to that feeling within your body.

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Stay with that as long as you can,

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until those thoughts and that 
resistance starts to settle.

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And you feel yourself sort of opening 
towards that feeling of abundance.

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Once you notice where in your body

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you can't feel abundance,

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switch your focus to where 
you can feel abundance.

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So maybe you can't 
feel it in your chest,

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maybe it's closed off to 
that sensation of having

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lots and lots and lots of money.

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But maybe in your arms,
you do actually feel

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that feeling of expansion,
that feeling of abundance,

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that feeling of wealth.

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Put all your focus there,

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and spread that through 
your entire body if you can.

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I did a video a while back 
called: "Feeling Signatures".

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If you haven't watched that video,
I highly suggest you watch it.

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Or even if you have,
go watch it again.

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Because I explained how people 
can use feeling signatures

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to make themselves feel better.

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But as it applies to meeting 
the unmet needs,

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it is so valuable.

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So for example, let's say that
what I want is belonging.

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But I haven't really had a 
direct access with belonging.

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And so how do I know 
what that feels like?

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What I do, is I look for some 
experience I've had in the past,

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that was the closest

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to what I think belonging 
might have felt like.

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So let's say, for me,

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the closest I got to belonging

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was this memory I have of
roasting marshmallows

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over a campfire.

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What I do is I take my 
attention and I place it

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fully and totally
(like in a meditation),

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on that memory,
on that experience,

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on the feeling of marshmallows.

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When I feel that in my body,

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I spread that sensation

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through every cell, 
into my bone marrow

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around every single organ.

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I use that sensation as a 
resource for belonging.

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The reality of this universe

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is that it's governed by 
the Law of Attraction.

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Things of like frequency 
match and coalesce.

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This is the real reason that 
people who are born wealthy

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have no problem creating wealth.

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They do not often have 
many thoughts or actions,

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or life experiences that contradict 
the frequency of wealth.

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In the absence of the contradiction

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nothing is preventing them 
from manifesting that need

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immediately.

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When you release resistance

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to the things that are preventing 
you from having what you need,

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when you give up what you have to 
give up, in order to get a need met,

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you can allow yourself to feel the 
opposite vibration of that lack.

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When you feel the opposite 
thing, the thing you need,

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and even more than that,

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when you recognize that 
you are feeling it,

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so it becomes real to your embodiment,

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the need is being met.

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Now, in a Law of 
Attraction-based universe,

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when that need starts getting 
met on that very deep,

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visceral, emotional and embodied level,

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the Law of Attraction must respond to it.

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It responds by bringing 
this need to you

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in ever increasing ways.

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It lines you up with the people

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who can meet those needs.

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It lines you up with ways

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that you can meet 
your own needs.

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It makes you coalesce

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with the circumstances,
to bring about the goals,

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that you want to achieve.

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It's almost like the Universe 
lays the path out

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for you to get those needs met.

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And it's no longer a question,

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because the "how" is done for you.

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Once you start this practise

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of meeting your unmet needs,

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especially those that you 
feel are out of your reach,

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there will no longer be 
a lack within your being.

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You will be restored to
a state of wholeness.

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Have a good week.

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Subtitles by: Krzysztof Piotrowski
& Tanya Duarte