0:00:01.260,0:00:02.909 If you're still struggling with consent, 0:00:02.930,0:00:05.240 just imagine instead of initiating sex, 0:00:05.269,0:00:07.044 you're making them a cup of tea. 0:00:07.463,0:00:09.359 You say: "Hey, would you like a cup of tea?" 0:00:09.402,0:00:12.084 and they go: "Oh my god, yes! 0:00:12.084,0:00:14.886 I would fucking love a cup of tea!" 0:00:15.597,0:00:17.058 Then you know they want a cup of tea. 0:00:18.186,0:00:20.736 If you say: "Would you like a cup of tea?" 0:00:20.736,0:00:24.185 And they're like: "I'm not really sure." 0:00:24.185,0:00:25.835 Then you could make them a cup of tea, 0:00:25.865,0:00:27.525 or not, but be aware: 0:00:27.525,0:00:29.066 They might not drink it. 0:00:29.076,0:00:31.348 And if they don't drink it, then - 0:00:31.348,0:00:33.289 - and this is the important part - 0:00:33.289,0:00:35.682 - don't make them drink it. 0:00:35.682,0:00:37.586 Just because you made it doesn't mean 0:00:37.586,0:00:39.112 you're entitled to watch them drink it. 0:00:39.732,0:00:41.669 And if they say "no, thank you." 0:00:41.669,0:00:44.605 then don't make them tea, at all. 0:00:44.605,0:00:46.537 Just don't make them tea. 0:00:46.537,0:00:47.723 Don't make them drink tea, 0:00:47.723,0:00:48.709 don't get annoyed at them 0:00:48.709,0:00:50.279 for not wanting tea, 0:00:50.279,0:00:52.915 they just don't want tea, ok? 0:00:52.915,0:00:55.452 They might say: "Yes please, 0:00:55.452,0:00:56.791 That's kind of you" 0:00:56.791,0:00:58.406 And then when the tea arrives, 0:00:58.406,0:01:00.244 they actually don't want the tea at all. 0:01:00.244,0:01:01.986 Sure that's kind of annyoing as you've 0:01:01.986,0:01:04.423 gone all the effort of making the tea, 0:01:04.423,0:01:07.763 but they remain under no obligation to drink the tea. 0:01:08.413,0:01:10.424 They did want tea, now they don't. 0:01:10.424,0:01:11.988 Some people change their mind in the time 0:01:11.988,0:01:14.191 it takes to boil the kettle, brew the tea 0:01:14.191,0:01:15.333 and add the milk. 0:01:15.333,0:01:17.510 And it's ok for people to change their mind 0:01:17.510,0:01:19.449 and you are still not entitled to watch 0:01:19.449,0:01:20.859 them drink it. 0:01:20.859,0:01:23.663 And if they're unconscious, don't make them tea. 0:01:23.663,0:01:25.848 Unconscious people don't want tea and they 0:01:25.848,0:01:28.622 can't answer the question "do you want tea?" 0:01:28.622,0:01:31.097 because they're unconscious. 0:01:31.097,0:01:33.049 Ok, maybe they were conscious when you 0:01:33.049,0:01:34.725 asked them if they wanted tea and they 0:01:34.725,0:01:36.697 said yes, but in the time it took you to 0:01:36.697,0:01:38.051 boil the kettle, brew the tea and 0:01:38.051,0:01:40.964 add the milk, they are now unconscious. 0:01:40.964,0:01:42.673 You should just put the tea down, 0:01:42.673,0:01:45.166 make sure the unconscious person is safe. 0:01:45.166,0:01:47.280 And this is the important part again: 0:01:47.280,0:01:49.946 Don't make them drink the tea! 0:01:49.946,0:01:53.314 They said yes then, but unconscious people 0:01:53.314,0:01:55.451 don't want tea. 0:01:55.451,0:01:57.728 If someone said yes to tea, started 0:01:57.728,0:01:59.002 drinking it and then passed out 0:01:59.002,0:02:00.964 before they finished it, don't keep on 0:02:00.964,0:02:02.955 pouring it down their throat. 0:02:02.955,0:02:05.357 Take the tea away, make sure they're safe. 0:02:05.357,0:02:09.990 Because unconscious people don't want tea, trust me. 0:02:10.440,0:02:11.720 If someone said yes to tea around your 0:02:11.720,0:02:14.189 house last saturday, that doesn't mean they want 0:02:14.189,0:02:16.439 you to make them tea all the time. 0:02:16.439,0:02:17.399 They don't want you to come around at their 0:02:17.399,0:02:19.486 place unexpectedly and make them tea, 0:02:19.486,0:02:21.002 force them to drink it, going: 0:02:21.002,0:02:22.852 "But you wanted tea last week" 0:02:22.852,0:02:24.715 Or to wake up to find you pouring 0:02:24.715,0:02:25.717 tea down their throat, going: 0:02:25.717,0:02:28.183 "But you wanted tea last night" 0:02:28.183,0:02:29.377 If you can understand how completely 0:02:29.377,0:02:31.180 ludicrous it is to force people to have 0:02:31.180,0:02:32.714 tea when they don't want tea, and 0:02:32.714,0:02:34.347 you're able to understand when people 0:02:34.347,0:02:36.496 don't want tea, then how hard is it to 0:02:36.496,0:02:39.081 understand when it comes to sex? 0:02:39.343,0:02:41.402 Wether it's tea or sex, 0:02:41.402,0:02:43.821 consent is everything. 0:02:43.821,0:02:45.631 And on that note, I'm going to go 0:02:45.631,0:02:47.316 make myself a cup of tea.