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先講個故事

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幾年前，有個活動策劃打電話給我

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因為我要辦一個講座

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她打給我說

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「我實在想不出來」

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「在傳單上要怎麼介紹你」

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我想說「為什麼想不出來？」

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她答：「看過你演講」

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「我想應該稱呼你為研究員」

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「但我怕這樣寫，沒有人會來聽演講」

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「因為研究員都很無聊、無關緊要」

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(笑聲)

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好吧

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然後她說「但我喜歡你演講的原因」

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「是因為很像在說故事」

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「所以我要稱你為說書人」

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我內心學術、沒安全感那面就跳出來

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「妳要叫我什麼？」

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她說：「說故事的人阿」

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我心想：「何不乾脆叫我魔法小精靈？」

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(笑聲)

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「讓我想一下」

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我鼓起勇氣

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我想：我是說書人

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我是定性研究員

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我工作就是搜集故事

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也許故事就是有靈魂的數據

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或許我真的就是說書人

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我就說：「好吧」

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「你就叫我研究說書員」

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她就回：「哈，沒這東西」

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(笑聲)

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所以我是個研究說書員

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我今天要告訴各位的

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是關於看法的擴展

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我要分享給各位幾個故事

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是我研究的一部份

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這部份徹底的擴展了我的觀點

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並確實改變了我生活、愛、

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工作、為人父母的過程

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這是我故事的開始

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當時我還是個年輕的研究員，念博士

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第一年，我有個教授

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告訴我們

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「是這樣的」

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「你無法測量的，就不存在」

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我想他只是講些好聽話而已

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我就說：「真的嗎？」他回：「千真萬確」

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你們要明白

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我學士、碩士都念社工

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我的博士學位也是社工

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所以我的學術事業

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都圍繞著

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一些相信

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「生活很混亂，愛它吧」的人

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但我是那種「生活很混亂」

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「那就收拾整齊」

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「並收進便當盒裡」的人

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(笑聲)

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我想我找到我的路

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發現一個能帶著我的事業

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社工常說的一句話

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偎緊工作令人不舒服的部份

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我則是那種，遇到不愉快就趕緊

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想辦法對付他並拿A

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我這樣催眠自己

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對此很期待

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我想，這就是我要做的大事了

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因為我對這些混亂的話題有興趣

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但我想讓他們變得不混亂

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我想搞懂他們

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我想徹底研究這些

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我知道很重要的事

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並把秘密找出來分享給大家

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所以我從"連結"開始

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因為，當了十年社工

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你會理解到

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連結就是我們都在此的原因

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這是我們生命被賦予意義的東西

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一切都與這相關

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不管你跟哪個領域的人聊天

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不論是社會公平、心理健康、 受虐與疏忽照顧

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我們知道，連結

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感受到彼此的連結是

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在神經生物學來說，是我們天生的

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我們在此的原因

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所以我想，我要以連結開始研究

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我想你們都經歷過

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老闆給的工作評價

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可能會是37件極佳的表現

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但有一件是 -- 尚待改進

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(笑聲)

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你腦子只會想這那尚待改進的事

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我的研究也是這樣

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因為當你問人們關於愛的故事

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他們會告訴你心碎的故事

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當你問人們關於歸屬的故事

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他們會告訴你那些他們被排除在外

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的椎心經驗

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因為當你問人們關於連結的故事

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他們會告訴你那些分離的故事

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所以很快的，研究開始的六週後

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就是這件不知如何命名的事

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讓連結瓦解

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我不懂也從未見過

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所以我將研究暫停

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我想，我一定要知道這是為什麼

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原來就是羞恥

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羞恥很好理解

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就是害怕失去連結

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我的哪些部份

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如果外人知道了

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會不會不想與我往來

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羞恥，我可以告訴你們

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是普遍存在的，我們都有

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那些沒有羞恥心的人

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沒有同情心與人類連結

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沒人想談羞恥

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越不談感受越大

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鞏固羞恥的東西

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這種「我不夠好」的感受

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我想我們都經歷過

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「不夠徹底、不夠纖瘦」

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「不夠有錢、不夠漂亮、不夠聰明」

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「不夠有才」

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支撐這種

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極痛苦的脆弱感的

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是這種

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為了要有連結

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我們必須讓自己被看見

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真的被看見

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各位都知道，我恨脆弱

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所以我想，這是我

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用量尺贏回來的機會

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我一定要搞懂這東西

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我要花一年的時間，破解羞恥

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我一定要了解脆弱是如何運作

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我要打敗它

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我準備好了，也很興奮

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各位也知道，結果沒有很好

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(笑聲)

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你們都懂

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關於羞恥我可以講很多

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但會佔用到其他講者的時間

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我可以告訴你的是，研究最終

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這是我十年的研究所學到最重要

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的其中一件事

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我的一年

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變成六年

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數千個故事

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數百個面談，團體會晤

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某階段還有人寄給我日記手札

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告訴我他們的故事

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六年間有數千筆數據

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我也大概弄懂了

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我有點明白羞恥是什麼

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是怎麼運作的

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我寫了本書

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出版了個理論

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但有件事還是不對

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就是

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我將我訪問過的人

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分為兩組

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一組是認為自己有價值的人 --

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這也是核心的部份

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個人價值感 --

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這些人有很強的愛與歸屬感

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另一組是掙扎的人

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他們總想自己是否夠好

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兩組間只有一個可變因素

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有強烈愛與歸屬感的人

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與掙扎的人之間

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只有一個可變因素

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這就是，那些

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有強烈愛與歸屬感的人

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相信他們是值得愛與歸屬的

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就這樣

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他們相信這是值得的

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對我來說，困難的部份

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唯一讓我們無法連結的部份

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就是害怕我們不值得彼此連結

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這個在個人以及工作上來說

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我覺得我應該要更精確理解

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所以我

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將所有的訪談裡

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看得出個人價值感的案例拿出來

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只看這些人

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這些人有什麼共同點？

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我對辦公用品有點龜毛

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但這是另一個故事了

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我拿了個分類文件夾、一隻簽字筆

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我就想，這研究要怎麼稱呼?

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我想到的第一個字就是

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全心全意

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這些都是全心付出的人，以強烈價值感活著

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所以我在資料夾上這樣寫

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並開始看我所找到的資料

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事實上

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我所做的是

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前四天都密集研究資料

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回到最初的訪問、故事、事件

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主題是什麼？模式是什麼？

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我老公帶孩子出遠門

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因為我整個廢寢忘食

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我狂寫資料

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進入我"研究員模式"

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我的研究結果是這樣的

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他們共有的

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是勇氣(courage)

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我想簡單解釋勇氣(courage)與勇敢(bravery)的不同

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勇氣最初的定義

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最早變成英語的時候

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是拉丁字源cor，表示"心(heart)"

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而它最初的定義

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就是全心全意講述關於你自己的故事

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所以這些人

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有著承認不完美

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的勇氣

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他們有同情心

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對自己好之後對別人好

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因為，後來發現，你要對別人有同情心

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就一定要先對自己好

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最後，他們都有著連結

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這是困難的部份

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就是"真實性"的結果

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他們願意放下他們想成為的自己

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為了做真正的自己

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而為了與人連結

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就必須這麼做

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他們的另一個共通點

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是這個

232
00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:38,000
他們坦蕩的接受脆弱

233
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:43,000
他們相信

234
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:46,000
讓他們脆弱的

235
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:48,000
會讓他們美麗

236
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:52,000
他們並不是說脆弱

237
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:54,000
是很自在的事

238
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:57,000
也不是很痛心的事

239
00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:59,000
從我早期"羞恥"訪問中發現的

240
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:02,000
他們認為脆弱是必須的

241
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:05,000
他們談到願意先說

242
00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:08,000
「我愛你」

243
00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:11,000
願意

244
00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:13,000
去做那些

245
00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:16,000
不保證美好的事

246
00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:18,000
願意

247
00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:20,000
在乳房X光檢查後深呼吸

248
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:22,000
等待醫生回電

249
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:26,000
願意投入一場戀愛

250
00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:29,000
不論結果好不好

251
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:32,000
他們認為這是很基本的

252
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:35,000
我個人認為這是背叛

253
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:38,000
因為我發了誓要

254
00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:40,000
做研究

255
00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:42,000
研究的定義

256
00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:45,000
就是控制和預測、研究現象

257
00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:47,000
就這麼簡單

258
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:49,000
控制和預測

259
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,000
所以我原本的任務

260
00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:53,000
控制和預測

261
00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:56,000
變成發現到人們都與脆弱一起生活

262
00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:59,000
並停止控制和預測

263
00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:02,000
後來導致我有點小崩潰

264
00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:06,000
(笑聲)

265
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:09,000
應該是這樣

266
00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:11,000
(笑聲)

267
00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:13,000
沒錯

268
00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:16,000
我稱為崩潰，我心理醫師稱為心靈覺醒

269
00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:19,000
心靈覺醒好聽多了

270
00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:21,000
不過我確定就是崩潰沒錯

271
00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:23,000
所以我把工作放下，去找心理醫師

272
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:26,000
告訴你吧，當你打電話給朋友並問他們：

273
00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:29,000
「我想我需要看心理醫生了，你有建議誰嗎？」的時候

274
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:32,000
就瞭解自己是誰了

275
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:34,000
我五個朋友都說

276
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,000
「真慶幸我不是你心理醫師」

277
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:39,000
(笑聲)

278
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:41,000
我就說：「你這什麼意思？」

279
00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:44,000
他們就說：「我只是說說」

280
00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:46,000
「別帶你的量尺就對了」

281
00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:49,000
好吧

282
00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,000
我找到了個醫師

283
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:56,000
我第一次與Diana的會診

284
00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:58,000
我帶上我的清單

285
00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:01,000
就是全心全意訪問清單，並坐下

286
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:03,000
她說：「你好嗎？」

287
00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:06,000
我說：「我很好阿」

288
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:08,000
她說：「你怎麼了？」

289
00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:11,000
我的心理醫師也看心理醫師

290
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:13,000
因為每個人都有心事

291
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:16,000
然後他們胡扯的功力都很厲害

292
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,000
(笑聲)

293
00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:20,000
然後我說

294
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:22,000
「是這樣的，我在掙扎」

295
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:24,000
她說：「掙扎什麼？」

296
00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:27,000
我說：「我跟脆弱槓上了」

297
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:30,000
「我知道脆弱是丟臉和害怕」

298
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,000
「的核心」

299
00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:34,000
「為了自我價值的掙扎」

300
00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:37,000
「但似乎也孕育出了」

301
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:40,000
「喜悅、創造力」

302
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:42,000
「歸屬和愛」

303
00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:44,000
「所以我想我遇到困難了」

304
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:47,000
「我需要幫忙」

305
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:49,000
「但是，不要跟我講」

306
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:51,000
「我家庭怎樣」

307
00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:53,000
「我童年怎樣的廢話」

308
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:55,000
(笑聲)

309
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:58,000
「告訴我怎麼做就好」

310
00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:02,000
(笑聲)

311
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:05,000
(掌聲)

312
00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:07,000
謝謝

313
00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:12,000
然後她就

314
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:14,000
(笑聲)

315
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:17,000
我問：「很糟吧？」

316
00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:20,000
她答：「不好也不壞啦」

317
00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:22,000
(笑聲)

318
00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:24,000
「不就這樣」

319
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:27,000
我說：「天哪，我完了」

320
00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:30,000
(笑聲)

321
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:32,000
是也不是啦

322
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:35,000
我看了一年的醫生

323
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:37,000
你們知道有些人

324
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:40,000
在明白脆弱與溫柔很重要之後

325
00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:43,000
會舉旗投降

326
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:45,000
A: 這不是我的個性

327
00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:48,000
B: 我不跟這種人交朋友

328
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:51,000
(笑聲)

329
00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:54,000
對我來說，很像長達幾年的街頭鬥毆

330
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:56,000
打鬥很激烈

331
00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:58,000
脆弱揍我，我打回去

332
00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:01,000
我輸了

333
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:03,000
但卻贏了我的生活

334
00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:05,000
所以我繼續這個研究

335
00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,000
花了幾年時間

336
00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:10,000
試著搞清楚這些全心全意的人

337
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:12,000
他們所做出的選擇

338
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,000
他們怎麼應付

339
00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:16,000
脆弱感的

340
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:18,000
為什麼我們如此掙扎？

341
00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:21,000
只有我與脆弱掙扎嗎？

342
00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:23,000
不是

343
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:25,000
這是我所學到的

344
00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:29,000
我們麻痺脆弱

345
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:31,000
例如我們在等待重要電話時

346
00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:33,000
蠻好笑的，我在推特和臉書上打了

347
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:35,000
「要如何定義脆弱？」

348
00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,000
「為什麼會感到脆弱？」

349
00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:40,000
大概一個半小時後，我收到150個回覆

350
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:42,000
因為我想知道

351
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:44,000
大家的情形

352
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:47,000
找老公幫忙

353
00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:50,000
因為我病了，而且才新婚、

354
00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:53,000
向老公求歡、

355
00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:55,000
向老婆求歡、

356
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:58,000
被拒絕、邀人去約會、

357
00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,000
等著醫生回電、

358
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:03,000
被辭退、辭退員工 --

359
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:05,000
這就是我們的生活

360
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:08,000
我們生活在脆弱的世界裡

361
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:10,000
而我們應付脆弱的其中一個方式

362
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:12,000
就是麻痺脆弱感

363
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,000
我認為這是有證據的

364
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:16,000
證據存在不只是唯一理由

365
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:18,000
我認為這是美國史上

366
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:22,000
越來越多負債、

367
00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:25,000
肥胖

368
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:28,000
成癮、依賴藥物、

369
00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:30,000
成群的很大原因

370
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:36,000
問題是 -- 這是我從研究中學到的 --

371
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:39,000
你無法選擇去麻痺情感

372
00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:43,000
不能說，我不喜歡這感覺

373
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:45,000
脆弱感、悲傷、羞恥

374
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,000
害怕、失望等等

375
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:49,000
我不想要有這種感受

376
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:52,000
去喝啤酒和香蕉堅果鬆餅解悶

377
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:54,000
(笑聲)

378
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:56,000
麻痺這些感覺

379
00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:58,000
我知道這笑聲

380
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:01,000
我把你們的生活都研究透徹了

381
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:03,000
天哪被發現了

382
00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:05,000
(笑聲)

383
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:08,000
要麻痺難過的感覺

384
00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:10,000
就要麻痹憐憫、情感

385
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:12,000
你不能選擇性麻痺

386
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:15,000
當我們麻痺這些

387
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:17,000
我們麻痺喜悅

388
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:19,000
我們麻痺感激

389
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:21,000
我們麻痺快樂

390
00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:24,000
之後感到痛苦

391
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,000
然後追求目標與意義

392
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:28,000
之後感到脆弱

393
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:31,000
然後去喝啤酒和香蕉堅果鬆餅解悶

394
00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:34,000
如此變成惡性循環

395
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:39,000
我們必須想想

396
00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:41,000
我們為什麼、如何麻痺

397
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:44,000
並不一定是因為習慣了

398
00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:46,000
我們會做的另一件事

399
00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:49,000
是確定那些令人不確定的事

400
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:53,000
宗教已從信仰與神秘

401
00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:55,000
變成確定的事

402
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:58,000
我對、你錯、閉嘴

403
00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,000
就這樣

404
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:02,000
就是確定性

405
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:04,000
我們越怕，就越脆弱

406
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:06,000
然後更害怕

407
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:08,000
有點像現今的政治

408
00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:10,000
沒有談話

409
00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:12,000
沒有交談

410
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:14,000
只有責怪

411
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:17,000
你們知道研究上怎麼描述"責怪"嗎？

412
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:20,000
釋放痛苦與不安的方式之一

413
00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:23,000
我們追求完美

414
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:26,000
世上唯有我希望生活如此

415
00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:28,000
但不這麼稱心

416
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,000
我們選擇將屁股的脂肪抽出來

417
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,000
並拿去豐唇

418
00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:35,000
(笑聲)

419
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,000
我希望幾百年後的人們

420
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:39,000
會對此瞠目咋舌

421
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:41,000
(笑聲)

422
00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:43,000
我們追求完美時，最危險的

423
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:45,000
就是要孩子完美

424
00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:47,000
跟你們講怎麼對待孩子吧

425
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:50,000
他們生來就得掙扎以達目的

426
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:53,000
當你手上抱著完美的寶寶時

427
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:55,000
我們的工作不是說：「看看她，真完美」

428
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:57,000
「我的工作是讓她保持完美」

429
00:17:57,000 --> 00:18:00,000
「確定她五年級時選上網球隊，國一跳級念耶魯」

430
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:02,000
這不是我們的工作

431
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:04,000
我們的工作是看著他們說

432
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:07,000
「你知道嗎？你不完美，你生來就得掙扎」

433
00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:09,000
「但你值得愛與歸屬的」

434
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,000
這才是我們的工作

435
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:13,000
如果一整代孩子都這麼養

436
00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:16,000
那今日的問題都可迎刃而解

437
00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:20,000
我們假裝我們所做的

438
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:23,000
對他人沒有影響

439
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,000
我們在他人的生活中都是這麼做的

440
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:27,000
還會合作完成--

441
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:29,000
不管是財政援助或油輪漏油、

442
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:31,000
產品回收--

443
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:33,000
我們假裝我們所做的

444
00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:36,000
對他人沒有極大的影響

445
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:39,000
大公司們，我們沒這麼好騙

446
00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:42,000
我們只要你們老實的說聲

447
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:44,000
「對不起」

448
00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:47,000
「我們會彌補」

449
00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:52,000
但還有別的方法的，我留此作結

450
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:54,000
這是我發現的：

451
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:56,000
讓自己被看見

452
00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:58,000
最深層的那面

453
00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:01,000
脆弱的那面

454
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,000
全心全意去愛

455
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,000
即使不保證有回報

456
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:07,000
即使很困難

457
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:10,000
尤其身為一個家長，我告訴你們，當我們恐懼時

458
00:19:12,000 --> 00:19:15,000
表達感激與喜樂

459
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:17,000
是很痛徹心扉的

460
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,000
當我們想：「我能否這麼愛你？」

461
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:21,000
「我能熱情地相信嗎？」

462
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:24,000
「我可以對此勇敢嗎？」的時候

463
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:26,000
能夠停下來，別把一切想的太糟糕

464
00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:29,000
然後告訴自己:「我很感激」

465
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:32,000
「因為會感到脆弱代表我還活著」

466
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:36,000
最後，我想最重要的是

467
00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:39,000
相信自己足夠了

468
00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:41,000
因為如果我們都能

469
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:44,000
相信自己「我夠好了」

470
00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:48,000
那我們便會停止抱怨並開始傾聽

471
00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:51,000
我們對身邊的人會更溫柔仁慈

472
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:54,000
對自己也會更溫柔仁慈

473
00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:56,000
就這樣，謝謝各位

474
00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:59,000
(掌聲)