Those of us who have been sexually abused or assaulted can struggle with our sexuality and sex life afterward. Today we talk about why many who have been abused or assaulted end up feeling very hypersexual. Meaning that we will want sex frequently, and even place ourselves in unsafe situations in order to have sex. It can be done impulsively, and without much care for our safety or wellness. In my experience, there are 3 reasons we act out in this way.

1. To regain control! Since being abused can cause us to feel like we have no control over our body and what happens to it, we can use sex as a way to show we have taken over that control. Meaning that we get to decide when we want sex, with whom, and how often. In a way, we are showing that instead of someone else deciding, we now decide.

2. Validation. If the abuse or assault happened in our formative years, we can grow up thinking that love, support, and validation come in the form of sex. This may have been the only time someone gave us one on one attention or told us they loved us. Therefore, we can grow up thinking that sex us the only way someone can show us, love. Being hypersexual really just means that we are seeking out love, support, and validation, which is something we all need.

3. Chemical. I know this sounds a bit odd, but sex releases feel-good hormones and neurotransmitters when we have sex. Therefore, we can actually become addicted to it. Since we may have lived much of our life getting this "high" from sex without knowing what it was, we can miss that feeling and seek it out. This leads to hypersexuality and is usually why many find themselves in risky situations because we are seeking it out no matter what the cost just so we can feel that way again.

Know that the majority of those who have been through sexual abuse or assault are hypersexual as a result. I am sure there are many more reasons for this, so please share your thoughts in the comments. I hope this helps you realize that you are not alone, and how you feel is very normal.

The best way to treat hypersexuality as a result of sexual abuse or assault is to see a trauma therapy and an addiction specialist. That way we can not only treat that chemical urge to seek sex out but also help you heal from the sexual trauma you sustained as a child. With both of these treatments on board, you can heal from your past and live the life you deserve. xoxo

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I'm Kati Morton, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos - Depression, Eating Disorders, Anxiety, Self-Harm and more! Mental health shouldn't have a stigma attached to it. You're worth the fight!

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